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| Topic: another Joke - part 2 | |
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An elderly couple was celebrating their 60th wedding anniversary. The couple had married as childhood sweethearts and had moved back to their old neighborhood after they retired:
Holding hands, they walked back to their old school. It was not locked, so they entered. They found the old desk they'd shared, where Jerry had carved: 'I love you, Sally' On their way back home, a bag of money fell out of an armoured car, practically landing at their feet. Sally quickly picked it up and, not sure what to do with it, they took it home. There, she counted the money, fifty thousand dollars! Jerry said. "We've got to give it back." Sally said. "Finders keepers." She put the money back in the bag and hid it in their attic. The next day, two police officers, who were canvassing the neighbourhood looking for the money, knocked on their door. "Pardon me, did either of you find a bag that fell out of an armoured car yesterday?" Sally said. "No." Jerry said. "She's lying. She hid it up in the attic." Sally said. "Don't believe him, he's getting senile." The agents turned to Jerry and began to question him. One said. "Tell us the story from the beginning." Jerry said. "Well, when Sally and I were walking home from school yesterday...." The first police officer turned to his partner and said. "Buddy, let's get out of here." 
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Funny
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F
 UNNY
An elderly couple was celebrating their 60th wedding anniversary. The couple had married as childhood sweethearts and had moved back to their old neighborhood after they retired: Holding hands, they walked back to their old school. It was not locked, so they entered. They found the old desk they'd shared, where Jerry had carved: 'I love you, Sally' On their way back home, a bag of money fell out of an armoured car, practically landing at their feet. Sally quickly picked it up and, not sure what to do with it, they took it home. There, she counted the money, fifty thousand dollars! Jerry said. "We've got to give it back." Sally said. "Finders keepers." She put the money back in the bag and hid it in their attic. The next day, two police officers, who were canvassing the neighbourhood looking for the money, knocked on their door. "Pardon me, did either of you find a bag that fell out of an armoured car yesterday?" Sally said. "No." Jerry said. "She's lying. She hid it up in the attic." Sally sa 't believe him, he's getting senile." The agents turned to Jerry and began to question him. One said. "Tell us the story from the beginning." Jerry said. "Well, when Sally and I were walking home from school yesterday...." The first police officer turned to his partner and said. "Buddy, let's get out of here."
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A man walks into a bar with a paper bag. He sits down and
Places the bag on the counter. The bartender walks up And asks what's in the bag. The man reaches into the bag and pulls out a little man, about One foot high and sets him on the counter. He reaches back Into the bag and pulls out a small piano, setting it on the counter As well. He reaches into the bag once again and pulls out a tiny piano bench, which he places in front of the piano. The little man sits down at the piano and starts playing a Beautiful piece by Mozart! 'Where on earth did you get that?' says the bartender. The man responds by reaching into the paper bag. This time he pulls out a magic lamp. He hands it to the bartender and says.... 'Here. Rub it.' So the bartender rubs the lamp, and suddenly there's a gust of smoke and a beautiful genie is standing before him....... 'I will grant you one wish. Just ! One wish~~ each person is only allowed one!' The bartender gets real excited. Without hesitating he says....... 'I want a million bucks!' A few moments later, a duck walks into the bar. It is soon followed by another duck, then another. Pretty soon, the entire bar is filled with ducks And they keep coming! The bartender turns to the man and says...... 'Y'know, I think Your genie's a little deaf. I asked for a million bucks, Not a million ducks.' 'Tell me about it!!' says the man, 'do you really think I asked for a 12 inch pianist?
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A man walks into a bar with a paper bag. He sits down and Places the bag on the counter. The bartender walks up And asks what's in the bag. The man reaches into the bag and pulls out a little man, about One foot high and sets him on the counter. He reaches back Into the bag and pulls out a small piano, setting it on the counter As well. He reaches into the bag once again and pulls out a tiny piano bench, which he places in front of the piano. The little man sits down at the piano and starts playing a Beautiful piece by Mozart! 'Where on earth did you get that?' says the bartender. The man responds by reaching into the paper bag. This time he pulls out a magic lamp. He hands it to the bartender and says.... 'Here. Rub it.' So the bartender rubs the lamp, and suddenly there's a gust of smoke and a beautiful genie is standing before him....... 'I will grant you one wish. Just ! One wish~~ each person is only allowed one!' The bartender gets real excited. Without hesitating he says....... 'I want a million bucks!' A few moments later, a duck walks into the bar. It is soon followed by another duck, then another. Pretty soon, the entire bar is filled with ducks And they keep coming! The bartender turns to the man and says...... 'Y'know, I think Your genie's a little deaf. I asked for a million bucks, Not a million ducks.' 'Tell me about it!!' says the man, 'do you really think I asked for a 12 inch pianist? F🤣U🤣N🤣N🤣Y
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A religious young woman went to confession one day.
When she had entered the confessional she said, "Forgive me Father, for I have sinned." The priest said, "Confess your sins my child and be forgiven." The young woman said, "Last night my boyfriend made mad passionate love to me seven times." The priest thought long and hard and then said, "Squeeze seven lemons into a glass and then drink the juice." The young woman asked, "Will this cleanse me of my sins?" The Priest said "No, but it should wipe that smile off of your face!"🤣🤣🤣 |
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Oh my God Apple too funny
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Let's laugh away our stress with ants.
1. 5 ants + 5 ants = Tenants. 2. To bring ant from another country into your country = Important. 3. Ant that goes to school = Brilliant. 4. Ant that's looking for a job = Applicant. 5. A spy ant = Informant. 6. A very little ant = Infant. 7. Ant that has a gun = Militant 8. Ant that is a specialist = Consultant 9. A proud ant = Arrogant  10. Ant that is cruel and oppressive = Tyrant 11. Ant that is friendly and lovely = Coolant 12. Ant that changed from evil to good deeds = Repentant 13. Ant that accumulated so much food in winter for summer = Abundant 14. Ant that doesn't need a change: Reluctant 15. An ant that keeps financial account = Accountant 16. Ant that occupies a flat = Occupant. 17. Very big ant = Giant 18. The best ant = Excellant  19. Big ant = Elephant 20. Ant that is important = Significant 21. A sarcastic Ant = Mordant 22. An extremely fast ant = Instant 23. Shouting Ant = Rant 24. An ant that doesn't keep changing = Constant. 25. A dirty Ant = Pollutant 26. Any you don't like = Irritant 27. An ant who wouldn't give up - Adamant 28. The Bubbly Ant - BouyAnt 29. The Loving Ant - FondAnt 30. The Dignified Ant - ElegAnt 31. Ant works for his master.. Servant |
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Father In Church - Anthony
  Whiskey In Night - Antibiotics   Wife In Life - Anticipated   NICE RADIANT  One Apple🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗 |
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Funny Apple
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°° Anniversary °°
 A man asks his wife on their 25th marriage anniversary: - Darling, have you been unfaithful to me? - Yes, honey, three times. - When was the first time? - Do you remember the situation when you went to a bank, but nobody would give you any credit ? And finally the CEO of the bank himself signed the credit allowance to you. - Thanks, darling. And when was the second time? - Do you remember when you were very ill and nobody would agree to perform the surgery on you? And finally the head of the department himself took care of you? - Thank you darling, you saved my life. And with whom have you been unfaithful to me for the third time? - Do you remember when you were a candidate to the position of city mayor and you still needed 26 more votes |
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°° Anniversary °°
A man asks his wife on their 25th marriage anniversary: - Darling, have you been unfaithful to me? - Yes, honey, three times. - When was the first time? - Do you remember the situation when you went to a bank, but nobody would give you any credit ? And finally the CEO of the bank himself signed the credit allowance to you. - Thanks, darling. And when was the second time? - Do you remember when you were very ill and nobody would agree to perform the surgery on you? And finally the head of the department himself took care of you? - Thank you darling, you saved my life. And with whom have you been unfaithful to me for the third time? - Do you remember when you were a candidate to the position of city mayor and you still needed 26 more votes |
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Funny Apple
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Funny Apple  .Enjoy Julie  
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°° Anniversary °° A man asks his wife on their 25th marriage anniversary: - Darling, have you been unfaithful to me? - Yes, honey, three times. - When was the first time? - Do you remember the situation when you went to a bank, but nobody would give you any credit ? And finally the CEO of the bank himself signed the credit allowance to you. - Thanks, darling. And when was the second time? - Do you remember when you were very ill and nobody would agree to perform the surgery on you? And finally the head of the department himself took care of you? - Thank you darling, you saved my life. And with whom have you been unfaithful to me for the third time? - Do you remember when you were a candidate to the position of city mayor and you still needed 26 more votes F🤣U🤣N🤣N🤣Y Damn was she married... one from the voters  
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While examining a female patient, Doctor tells her, “Your heart, lungs, pulse, BP are fine. Now let me see that cute little thing which gets you ladies into all kinds of trouble.
"The lady immediately started taking off her jeans and underwear. The doctor, shocked, said, “No! No! Please put on your clothes. Just show me your tongue…” 🤪🤪🤪 |
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F
UNNY Oh Doctor... I'm sure he must have attended her after clinic 🤫 |
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Funny
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A boy, his father and his mother are having dinner. But the boy doesn’t want to eat his broccoli.
Eat your broccoli! – says the mother. No! – exclaims the boy. The father then leans toward the boy and whispers something in his ear. The boy quickly eats his broccoli and goes into his room. What did you tell him? I told him that if he didn’t eat his broccoli, his mickey wouldn’t grow. The woman then stands up and slaps the man as hard as she can. What was that for? – he asks, confused. FOR NOT EATING YOUR BROCCOLI WHEN YOU WERE A CHILD! |
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A boy, his father and his mother are having dinner. But the boy doesn’t want to eat his broccoli. Eat your broccoli! – says the mother. No! – exclaims the boy. The father then leans toward the boy and whispers something in his ear. The boy quickly eats his broccoli and goes into his room. What did you tell him? I told him that if he didn’t eat his broccoli, his mickey wouldn’t grow. The woman then stands up and slaps the man as hard as she can. What was that for? – he asks, confused. FOR NOT EATING YOUR BROCCOLI WHEN YOU WERE A CHILD! FUNKYsize matter babu size matter
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