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| Topic: How do you Men feel about women... | |
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Edited by
indianadave4
on
Sat 12/15/18 01:51 AM
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IMO, men like to chase women BUT the woman must respond when the man shows interest.
If she plays the "Chase Me Game" most men will drop them like a hot potatoe. Women who want to play Chase Me are arrogant and men hate that. |
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Very well said and informative... Thanks Tom 
I love the movie, "What Women Want". After watching it I wondered what it would be like to have it reversed, "What Men Want". Although, maybe it's a good thing we can't hear each other's thoughts, lol.. Learning each other's language and seeing through the eyes of another is an excellent way to understand what works for them. That's pretty important when it comes to relationships, and the initiating process. If someone hates roses, you don't give them roses just because you love them and expect that person to be happy with them. Someone must have heard you... What Men Want (2019) Comedy, Fantasy, Romance | 8 February 2019 (USA) http://www.imdb.com/title/tt7634968/ A woman is boxed out by the male sports agents in her profession, but gains an unexpected edge over them when she develops the ability to hear their thoughts. Here's a trailer for the movie http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oIrQ7q0xdVc |
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Frankly, I don't give a damn about the "Me Too" thing. I was simply making a response to the topic and offering an opinion of why men might want a woman to be more agressive than in the past. As River said, the topic is about how men feel. If she (or anyone else) wants to understand that, then this is one part of the topic that does need to be covered with more than just a cursory reference. It's not about whining or complaining. It's about reaching a common understanding. Personally I respect others, man or woman. I also place no value on status because we all bleed blood and every single one of us dies at some time. There's no reason to be hostile to anyone unless you've become mad at the world and that is a whole different personality issue. And here you touch on another aspect that makes men pull back. Many women have attitudes, and are verbally combative. They go full-offense, using that offense as their defense without giving a man time to think, let alone gain some composure and control over their emotions. If the man says he needs to walk away to collect himself, the woman won't grant him the opportunity. Just look at reality t.v. It's full of stuff like this. Personally, I can't stand reality t.v., but there are millions in this country who watch it on a regular basis. That's going to have an impact on how people behave around other people. I'm turned off by women who are like that. Just as I'm turned-off by constant trash-talking -- it can be fun in small doses, but some people make it a way of life. But, from a man's point of view (help me out here guys) there are some things we would love to see from a woman in the relationship 'game'... Lets see if we can come up with an action plan for those women that want to be more aggressive without coming off as sleazy. Cheerfulness While being over-all cheerful can't hurt the cheerfulness I'm referring to is the light up you display when you see someone you want to meet. I know I notice the extra glow in her eyes when she looks at me. I kinda like that because it makes me feel that she is extra happy to see me. This opens me to positive interaction with her. Sadness or Stress Sadness and stress usually gives negative results unless the man you are targeting has a need to help women in distress. I'd be careful with that because after a relationship is established it could make that personality type cause sadness or stress to fill his needs. Being Complete Many women think men respond well to needy women. Some men do want to complete you. They want to fix you, provide for you and save you. That is another dangerous personality. When I see a woman that needs a man to be her, I see a woman that doesn't know how to take care of herself. When I see a woman that has her shidt together it makes her attractive to me. Be self-assured and personally complete. Appearance Appearance is kinda tricky. For the most part she should look and smell clean. She shouldn't have everything caked on like a clown. Her clothes should be practical for the activity they are attending. Evening gown at a bowling alley, shorts and tank top at a fine restaurant, that kinda thing is out of whack. Location I believe the location is important as well. Most of the time, outside is the best place to approach. If you're hitting on me while I'm supposed to be working and the boss is watching, I'm not gunna like it. If you hit on me while I'm playing a game of football or basket ball, I'm probably not going to notice you and even if I did, I wouldn't be able to give you any attention because my attention is on something else. Wait till I am out away from distractions to deliver your advance. Personally, I have no idea what to do about cell phone addiction. I find people on their phones as unapproachable because they are 'occupied' and I don't want to interrupt them. The Man's Conditions This is pretty important. If you observe your target before approaching and get to know his habits and comfort zones you won't find yourself dismissed as much. If he's filthy dirty and hot from work, wait till he gets cleaned up. If he is anxious about something, wait till he is more cordial and relaxed. If he is displaying illness symptoms, you might wait till he's feeling better. Yes, you might be able to offer him relief or compassion but he's probably not going to respond like you hope. I deal with pain and sickness and when I'm in pain or feeling nauseous I'm certainly not looking to be approached by woman for a relationship. Quite frankly, I won't even be paying you much attention. Choose Your Words What you say to me is going to set the tone of the interaction. Not sure about other men but I appreciate direct. Just say it, don't beat around the bush and expect me to pick up what you mean. I really don't want to play those games. Its not high school. We're adults and think like adults. Say what you mean and mean what you say. I'm sure there are other men that could offer you more understanding or tips to get our positive attention. Rejection No matter what you try, you tried. If rejected, just move to your next target. Consider, if you did the best you can, he might not be the one that matters. You don't need to find 'every' man, you only really need to find one (for most people). "Okay, this one didn't work out, NEXT..." Here you dive right into positive and constructive thought, but to be realistic, you must acknowledge both the positives and the negatives. I understand that you're trying to keep the thread from spiraling into a gripe-fest. The problem is, you can't just ignore the negative types of behavior that make some men wary about women. Just as women don't want a man who's abusive or womanizing, men don't want a woman who's going to use him or make him feel like trash. As it turns out, one big area that you left out was ATTITUDE. You touched on it only tangentially, but attitude can be either a turn-on or a turn-off. It's a lot more than just Cheerfulness, Sadness/Stress, Completeness (aka Independence), Man's Condition (aka Empathy), Wording (aka Tactfulness), and Appearance. For instance, what about: Composure (outside of rejection) Interaction (with others while you're with each other) Habits (OCD? No filter? Loud? Heavy drinking? Etc.) The point is, if a woman wants to approach a guy and land him, she's going to want to put her proverbial best foot forward. The problem with that becomes, is she still being herself, or just pretending to be something she's not? That's the flaw in what you've presented. As a guy, I don't want someone who puts on a show just to impress me. I want to be sure that she and I are compatible even on our worst days. I want to see the real her. Otherwise, it's not going to last more than a handful of dates. I write off a lot of women because I just don't like what I see. I'm speaking of the entire package, not just appearance. The number one thing I look for in a woman? Depth of personality Very well-worded expression on topic! 
Here you dive right into positive and constructive thought, but to be realistic, you must acknowledge both the positives and the negatives.
The way I see it, a woman seeking to understand what to do already experiences what not to do. An Assumption on my part but I want to try to respond with positives to encourage women to try. Mainly because I prefer a woman that tells me she is interested in me. There are plenty of negatives (which you covered nicely) but when we focus on the negatives it shuts down the learning brain. If the thread is all about the negative, they're not gunna read it and take it to heart. The problem with that becomes, is she still being herself, or just pretending to be something she's not?
That's the flaw in what you've presented. I also believe this is very important. The suggestions were hypothetical and only to be considered. The woman, is expected to be able to understand herself enough to know which qualities she already possesses in her personality. It also allows a woman to change and everybody changes, especially when you get positive reinforcement. I believe you have a good grasp on the traits you don't want. Depth of Personality is very important as well. Problem is, how is a woman supposed to learn from it? How can they be encouraged to show their depth of personality if she is having a problem getting the courage to even say hello? 
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Hey
I thought it was obvious since I'm here . Lol So really the Hollywood endings we think we might end up in if guys made the move is an illusion . Lol, how silly of me! Yeah, I'm beginning to believe that. So next time I end up in the elevator with some man and there's a mistletoe above us I won't wait for him to kiss me first... I'll be the one doing it 
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IMO, men like to chase women BUT the woman must respond when the man shows interest. If she plays the "Chase Me Game" most men will drop them like a hot potatoe. Women who want to play Chase Me are arrogant and men hate that. Hi indianadave, in saying "most men" are you including yourself in that? Do you believe that all women who desire a man to pursue them or ask them out first are playing the "chase me game"? |
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Very well said and informative... Thanks Tom
I love the movie, "What Women Want". After watching it I wondered what it would be like to have it reversed, "What Men Want". Although, maybe it's a good thing we can't hear each other's thoughts, lol.. Learning each other's language and seeing through the eyes of another is an excellent way to understand what works for them. That's pretty important when it comes to relationships, and the initiating process. If someone hates roses, you don't give them roses just because you love them and expect that person to be happy with them. Someone must have heard you... What Men Want (2019) Comedy, Fantasy, Romance | 8 February 2019 (USA) http://www.imdb.com/title/tt7634968/ A woman is boxed out by the male sports agents in her profession, but gains an unexpected edge over them when she develops the ability to hear their thoughts. Here's a trailer for the movie http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oIrQ7q0xdVc WooHoo! Thanks Tom, I'll be sure to go watch it.
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Edited by
I_love_bluegrass
on
Sat 12/15/18 07:49 AM
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The point is, if a woman wants to approach a guy and land him, she's going to want to put her proverbial best foot forward. The problem with that becomes, is she still being herself, or just pretending to be something she's not? That's the flaw in what you've presented. As a guy, I don't want someone who puts on a show just to impress me. I want to be sure that she and I are compatible even on our worst days. I want to see the real her. Otherwise, it's not going to last more than a handful of dates. I write off a lot of women because I just don't like what I see. I'm speaking of the entire package, not just appearance. The number one thing I look for in a woman? Depth of personality Odd you say that about "putting you best foot forward"... I've had some guys be downright mean and demanding right off the bat....like, bro....you think *that's* the way to impress/ win over someone? I wouldn't want a *guy* to put on a fake front, engage in subterfuge, etc... Because, even though that might *initially* be interesting to me....how long can he keep it up? I see no point in that. Be yourself, because odds are your real self is cool, and interesting to me... 
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IMO, men like to chase women BUT the woman must respond when the man shows interest. If she plays the "Chase Me Game" most men will drop them like a hot potatoe. Women who want to play Chase Me are arrogant and men hate that. Hi indianadave, in saying "most men" are you including yourself in that? Do you believe that all women who desire a man to pursue them or ask them out first are playing the "chase me game"? There is a difference between a woman making interesting glances or a quick Hi and a woman who aggressively goes after a man. Interesting glances and friendly responses when the man initiates a conversation go along way to encourage a guy. In this age of #Metoo decent men are a bit hesitant to start something out of the blue. Eye contact can be a positive motivation. IMO most women hesitate to be aggressive with a stranger: even if he is handsome. ---------------- The "chase me game" is a woman who thinks she's God's gift to men. That every man on earth should desire her. At my age If I attempt to start a conversation (to see if she's interested) I expect her to respond as an adult not as a 16 year old high school girl. |
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IMO, men like to chase women BUT the woman must respond when the man shows interest. If she plays the "Chase Me Game" most men will drop them like a hot potatoe. Women who want to play Chase Me are arrogant and men hate that. Hi indianadave, in saying "most men" are you including yourself in that? Do you believe that all women who desire a man to pursue them or ask them out first are playing the "chase me game"? There is a difference between a woman making interesting glances or a quick Hi and a woman who aggressively goes after a man. Interesting glances and friendly responses when the man initiates a conversation go along way to encourage a guy. In this age of #Metoo decent men are a bit hesitant to start something out of the blue. Eye contact can be a positive motivation. IMO most women hesitate to be aggressive with a stranger: even if he is handsome. ---------------- The "chase me game" is a woman who thinks she's God's gift to men. That every man on earth should desire her. At my age If I attempt to start a conversation (to see if she's interested) I expect her to respond as an adult not as a 16 year old high school girl. Well of course we are, didn't you read the Bible?  
I t always baffled me when someone says "act my age"... How exactly does "an adult" act? How is a 56 year old supposed to act? Rhetorical questions btw... Me personally, I don't adhere to the "act your age" crap... I just act the way it feels right for me!
I know what you're saying about the ones on a high horse though, I don't care for men with that kind of personality either. |
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Act my age, sorry that isn’t possible. I enjoy who I am and what I do and if I’m acting silly or childish, it’s always in a fun way. I’m not afraid to shoot nerf guns or throw snowballs or dance with my dog. I don’t want to be with anyone that has lost that playfulness. |
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Act my age, sorry that isn’t possible. I enjoy who I am and what I do and if I’m acting silly or childish, it’s always in a fun way. I’m not afraid to shoot nerf guns or throw snowballs or dance with my dog. I don’t want to be with anyone that has lost that playfulness. 
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Act my age?? When that happens, I'll be ready for the morgue!!
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Its all a matter of effectively displaying what you might think your target is wanting.
You display your feathers and if they are interested, they'll respond. The question is when, what and how much? This thread is about making the first move and how MEN react to women that make the first move. I suggested that men comment on the things that make them take notice of a woman making the first move. For some reason, nobody can offer anything constructive on the subject. Many responses are focused on the negative. Personally, I like it when a woman initiates the first move. It gives me a sense of importance and I and certainly attentive to her. That 'first move' varries person to person but its not really the first move that matters. Its the attention they give me personally. If you are trying to make the first move, it seems to me that you wouldn't do things that are normal for the situation. You will do or say something to me personally that makes it stand out that you are interested in getting to know me above anyone else. So, anything that is personal towards me indicates you are focused on me. Touch my hand when you talk, look me in the eye, stand directly in front of me. That is going to get my attention focused on you. Then, once you have my attention, say something that indicates your intentions. Hi, I'm "..." isn't enough. Include that you noticed me and you want to get to know me better. That would certainly inspire me to respond favorably, even if I am not interested in you. Personally, I would state that I am not intrested in anything intimate but we can still be friendly if I don't find you attractive. But, if you never try, you will never now. Rejection doesn't mean there is something wrong with you, it only means that I don't feel an attraction to you right now. Just move on... However, if I am attracted to you, things might go very differently. That fisrt conversation with a potential is very important. You keep the focus of the conversation on me and what I do to make you attracted to me. My response would be to also tell you why I find you attractive, then I might ask if we can do something together or meet again. I might ask for your phone number. |
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Women are the aggressor more times then people may think. It is just not spoken about because it breaks the " law of the jungle"
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Women are the aggressor more times then people may think. It is just not spoken about because it breaks the " law of the jungle"
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Act my age, sorry that isn’t possible. I enjoy who I am and what I do and if I’m acting silly or childish, it’s always in a fun way. I’m not afraid to shoot nerf guns or throw snowballs or dance with my dog. I don’t want to be with anyone that has lost that playfulness. 
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Its all a matter of effectively displaying what you might think your target is wanting. You display your feathers and if they are interested, they'll respond. The question is when, what and how much? This thread is about making the first move and how MEN react to women that make the first move. I suggested that men comment on the things that make them take notice of a woman making the first move. For some reason, nobody can offer anything constructive on the subject. Many responses are focused on the negative. Personally, I like it when a woman initiates the first move. It gives me a sense of importance and I and certainly attentive to her. That 'first move' varries person to person but its not really the first move that matters. Its the attention they give me personally. If you are trying to make the first move, it seems to me that you wouldn't do things that are normal for the situation. You will do or say something to me personally that makes it stand out that you are interested in getting to know me above anyone else. So, anything that is personal towards me indicates you are focused on me. Touch my hand when you talk, look me in the eye, stand directly in front of me. That is going to get my attention focused on you. Then, once you have my attention, say something that indicates your intentions. Hi, I'm "..." isn't enough. Include that you noticed me and you want to get to know me better. That would certainly inspire me to respond favorably, even if I am not interested in you. Personally, I would state that I am not intrested in anything intimate but we can still be friendly if I don't find you attractive. But, if you never try, you will never now. Rejection doesn't mean there is something wrong with you, it only means that I don't feel an attraction to you right now. Just move on... However, if I am attracted to you, things might go very differently. That fisrt conversation with a potential is very important. You keep the focus of the conversation on me and what I do to make you attracted to me. My response would be to also tell you why I find you attractive, then I might ask if we can do something together or meet again. I might ask for your phone number. Thank you Tom
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নাইচ
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কোন রিয়েল মেয়ে থাকলে আমাকে নক করবেন
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Can you please translate that?
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