Thanks newbiechick,
You're right you never get the full story about what happens behind closed doors, which is why I've learned not to covent what others have. You might just get what you wished for! All of it, not just the pretty part

I recently went to my sorority 20th anniversary, in Atlanta, and had a blast. But in talking to my line sisters I found a disturbing trend.

Many we're married and had children and were content with their lives, the kicker was that most confessed that they were NEVER attracted to their husbands. They married them for various reasons: they wanted families, they knew he would be faithful, they knew he would be a good provider, they knew he would provide a stable environment. Most loved their husbands but were never in love with them. Sex and intimacy was something that they DID to get what they wanted.

That sounds so sad to me. To spend my life with someone I wasn't excited to see or hold. To be with someone who didn't give me butterflies or when i saw them grin so hard my lips went numb.

I've been on lots of dates, with men that I've met online. We have had a great time, had plenty in common, but for me no spark.

My question is: am I'm expecting too much to have the physical attraction as well as the honesty, faithfulness, security, etc? Am I short changing myself and him for settling for anything less?

Input?

It seems that so often we get caught up in looking for what we think we want that we don't see what we have right in front of us.

Nice, honest, single women are everywhere, heck that describes most of my girlfriends.
But, if we are not wrapped up in the 'dressing' you have convinced yourself that you want, you walk away from something that has the potential to be more amazing then you ever dreamed of.

The ladies are out there, so are the men, we just need to see each other for who we are rather than who we think we want.

It ain't easy!

Sexiness is still a big part of attraction, but everyone finds different things sexy.
I had an ex that told me the sexiest thing about me was my confidence and how I carried myself.

I'm a strong believer that a great personality definitely make you more attractive and hence sexier.
It seems that everyone has something different that rings their bell and makes them sit up and notice.

I believe that the only true love at first sight I've seen is a mom setting her eyes for the first time on her newborn.

Always read the profile.
It amazes me what some people will post as a screen name or say in their profiles.
Or those that say absolutely nothing in their profiles.

Not a myth, I know women who engage in NSA relationships.

I work in healthcare and just the thought of this is super scary

Wow,
Thanks dmckinnon. I've never participated in forums before but I find the topics and responses from others here interesting and thought provoking

I'm not sure what you mean exactly by 'condone' sexual activity but will go with what I know for myself.

First I have to be honest about myself with myself. So am I perfect?, absolutely not. Have I enjoyed a sexual relationship outside of marriage? Yes. When asked do I admit that? Yes

I've been told by several people that they are hesitant with people claiming to be Christians because they are often people that present themselves as 'morally superior' to others, sit in judgement of others and then it all comes crashing down when skeletons in their closets are revealed. And I mean seriously nasty skeletons!

The way I reconcile my faith is knowing that every time I make a mistake I can come, with a sincere heart, and ask for forgiveness. God works, almost exclusively, with screw ups in the bible.

What I believe is, that as Christians we need not to be afraid to show our faults and insecurities with others, we are not immune because of our faith, but we also need to show how we face and deal with these issues through our faith. That we take these opportunities, learn from them, allow our church families to be our support and Christ to be our guide.

Do I advocate for casual sex with multiple partners? No. Do I sit in judgement of those who do? No. My heart aches for so many because I have no idea what path I life has lead them to the place they are now. If they ask for my opinion I first ask do they want the truth or do they want to hear what they want to hear. If it is the truth then I give it to them and why I believe what I do.

This may not be the best answer, but it is an honest one.

I tend to be straight forward and prefer to tell someone what I want upfront. This helps both of us realize if this is something worth pursuing. I respect other's time and energy and would hope they would respect mine.

I'm at an age where I'm comfortable with myself on almost every level, physical, emotional, spiritual, etc, so this is it. If that doesn't work for someone then we should keep it moving.

Now with that being said I'm also a great believer in the slower reveal. I will not be sharing all of my heart's desire in those first 5 dates because you have to continually assess the relationship and its progression or lack thereof.

Be honest, be upfront but don't spill your guts in the first 45 minutes of meeting.

Yes, sex is REALLY necessary in a romantic, monogamous relationship.
Sex can be shared in various forms.
But sex does help to open up ways to communicate effectively with your partner and I believe that most of us understand how important that is to the survival of a relationship

Single and OVER it!

Him, watching my face light up when our eyes connect
Me, seeing that self satisfying smirk appear when our eyes connect
Both of us thinking that all me right there!

For family and friends who want the best for me and believe in me when I don't believe in myself!

A vet at Sea World San Diego.
It's been a dream of mine since I was 6 years old

A vet at Sea World San Diego.
It's been a dream of mine since I was 6 years old

Let's see, after several incidences of 'mis-communication' standard questions:
1. Are you single?
2. How long have you been single?
3. And is your last girlfriend and/or wife aware that you are single?

It seems that some men have a propensity to change their status without informing their partners of the change.
Go figure

You must have lasers in your eyes because you have stunned me

You must have a fever. You're way too hot

I wish I was a DNA helicase, so I could unwrap your genes

Why aren't you in jail? It's illegal to look that good

All have been sent to me multiple times on multiple sites and all are HORRIBLE

Los Angeles!

Sure,
We can start a conversation.

I was a Biology teacher for 3 years and think you teaching in China sounds really interested. I would like to hear more about that.

When I worked in public health I did a lot of travel to Sacramento. In the 7 years of travel I watched the city really build up in that time. I know it's not said often, but I did find a subtle beauty in Sacramento.

Hopefully, we can start a dialogue and become friends.

I look forward to hearing from you.