I figure ..whoever invites... pays. I sure am not going to invite someone to a cruise and expect them to pay. Same concept for a movie or dinner. "Hey let's go to dinner and a movie!" "okay sounds good!" .. "Ok you pay!" ... Somehow it just doesn't pan out for me. If you invite, you should be paying. If they invite, they should be paying. Just the way I view it.

I don't know about everywhere else but if a guy pulled that kind of stuff in my circles he would get such a big social freeze out he would think his jewels went down with the Titanic.

If I were you I would be expecting to find some reindeer crap in my Christmas stocking. Hope your car insurance is really good.

I believe that any first date should be discussed beforehand. Discuss where we are going, and the method of paying for it. That way, there are no surprises.

HEY!!! if there is any decentsy left in this world the man should pay, i am and allways will be a male chouvanistic pig and believe there is a mans place and a womans place , i think our grandfathers had it bout right imho peace

So, what's a man's place and a woman's place?

a woman deserves to be treated like a lady, cos she's the one that bears the children, while the man goes off to do the huntin, no matter what the circumstance the male is the stronger sex(physically) , the woman should be at home lookin after the house/children etc etc makin sure the man is well enough to do his performin

simple!
....and if you know you can't pay, don't ask for a date!

My how things have changed! But, I'm sure you will find some women who are still ok with staying home and taking care of the house.

good point that no one else has raised - if u can't afford to take someone out to dinner then suggest a walk % a cup of coffee, or a couple of beers (depending on time of day)

there are numerous low & no cost options

and yes, if someone asked me to dinner I might well leave the house without cash - I might have a card on me but not necessarily budgeted a dinner out for that pay period - I have had men ask me to places that normally I could not afford in my budget except for special occasions

and sorry - as much as I might want to get to know you - I do not consider a 1st date a special occasion nor should it be a surprise expense - for either the man or the woman

just one more reason to choose something low cost - to avoid this whole issue until u know each other better

it's pretty tacky to be discussing all of this with someone u don't even know - JMHO

I actually think it's a good idea to bring this kind of stuff up with someone you are considering going out with, if it's something you're worried about. That way, there are no surprises.

I wouldn't be going out to a fancy restaurant on a first date, so there would be no worries about not being able to afford at least my share of dinner.

I do agree that there are lots of low cost options for a first date, though. That's definitely a good idea, as you never know how the date will go and if you don't spend much money, there's not much lost if it doesn't work out.

it's not something I would bring up and if a man did I don't know how I would perceive that - unless it was someone I already knew fairly well, for example - then that is different.

I don't typically have men ask me to pay on a date - I offer to pick up some portion each time but they always say no - they've got it

and I do think if he invites me, he should expect to pay for at least the part that he invited me to.

I do not like going out to dinner anyway as a first date. and I definitely think it is even more tacky to use a guy as a wallet. So if I am not interested in someone I will not continue to accept dates regardless of their cost

I think that is good advice in terms of compatibility - I see a man's willingness to pay as his level of interest in me

but some men have an attitude about paying for a date - not a man I would be compatible with anyway -even tho I would not waste his wallet, I'm not compatible with that attitude

The reason I say it may be a good idea to discuss beforehand is for the people who assume the other will be paying. Especially, since as we can see from this thread, people have very different ideas of how dates should be paid for.

What do you mean they have an attitude about paying for a date? I'm not sure I understand what you're saying.

OK, I'll buy! The foods getting cold already.

People spend too much time worrying about the little things.

The coin toss.

Rock Paper scissors.

Guess which hand.

The check please lol!

Works for me.

Well I'm thinking "how much can the girl eat after all?"

All you can eat places sound good for me. Some even serve wine.