I've recieved emails from men in Africa who is also looking for marriage.....I've already been married, and will never walk down that path ever again in this life!

But GOOD LUCK to the OP

Just when I was about to pop the question. Great, thanks a lot find. You heart breaker. love ya!

A big fat kiss for you my little darlin!

{{{MUAHS}}} Michael

Hi Sing

I think that you and I just have different communicative ideas and objectives. I speak from my experience and don't wish to label you or anyone else in their approach to life and the way they want to conduct themselves. Hope I have not offended you.

I'm not offended. Just surprised that you have continued to label people who do certain things based solely on your own experience, assuming they're all the same. Like I've said before, maybe one day you'll realize that not everyone is exactly like those of your past.

I'm guilty of this myself. Intellectually, I know that not everyone has to be the same in any particular circumstance. Experientially, I have nothing to support the idea of someone being different. It resolves itself in an expectation that everyone will, eventually, turn out to be lying to me, because they "always do." Sure, I'd love to find someone different, but I have nothing concrete to prove that such a person really exists.

When in doubt, experience trumps blind (and wholly unsupported) hope....

I think that maybe you are thinking I'm labeling people. Could you give me an example of me doing so.

The big example would be the way you talk about people in bars. As you've let us all know, you would sleep with women anytime you went to a bar and you seem to think that women in bars now are all like those you used to deal with. And you seem to think all men are like you used to be.. the "bar fly" you now don't like.

Maybe you should read those particular posts more carefully and ask about specific quotes from them to see the meaning behind the quotes if you have questions about them. Your painting a character about me that I don't see in these posts. Your making some board swipes with your comments that I don't think people including myself would agree with your interpretations. I appreciate that your trying to make a point by creating a point but you are doing so going outside of the words said (and their meaning)to get there.

All I've done is go by what you've posted here. When I brought up having a drink with someone, you made sure to point out how you felt about women in bars. Maybe you were just talking about your past, but it seemed as though you had the same opinion of those who meet others for drinks in bars these days as well.

If that's the case, no worries. You and I don't think the same way and don't agree on much at all.

see who you have that certain "je ne sais qua" with?



^^ What he said

If there's a special bond, the rest will click into place.

Sing

I went back and looked at my comments. I believe the one you are referring to that you have made into and issue is "After 2 drinks things start taking on that different look. Let me ask myself. Michael, have you ever hung out in a bar and not got laid?". From this comment you have spun off in a direction that is not so clear. Maybe you should attempt to make it more so or ask me about it. Making loose statements about how someone thinks can and does get a little touchy and you seem to want to approach that line with people. This to me is a good example of what I or someone like me would mean by not being honest. It's a twisting of the words to make something out of something else that we (the people who wish to be straight up) do not get into. If you and I were out on a date talking like this it would be a drag would you not agree? We see this statement as saying two different things altogether. One is what I said and the other is what you made it into. Now who would want a date that went like that? Or who would even want to waste their time on the potential of a date like that?

Being straight up is exactly that. It's getting at the truth without twist and turns along the way that don't need to be there. it's listening to the other person for the sake of understanding and not judgment. Some how you have taken what I have said and instead of asking me "straight up" about it you rephrased it and threw it back out. It would have been much simpler to have said can you explain.

Are all women in bars bar flys?

Don't know the ones that approached me were.

What did you mean by getting laid?

I got women that came up to me through the night groping and offering themselves to me for sex.

Do I think all women are like this?

Only the ones that did it to me, which sometimes were quite a few during the night.

Did I fall into this trap?

Unfortunately yes, but I must explain this was after my divorce of only ever being with one women up till the age of 27 and never having experienced the pick up bar fly scene before.

Did this last long or continue?

No, once I came to my senses that I was being treated like a piece of meat I stopped the bar scene.

Do I have a different view of bars than others might?

Probably but the stories I hear sound pretty similar. Either they were amazed at how many women were approaching me and they wanted some of that or they were in the same boat or they were just there for the purpose of getting laid. Honestly there was not a ton that went on that didn't involve the s word at the bars that I went to. even if the guys were shooting pool they were checking out some butt. I was not like this I'm proud to say.

Please feel free to ask me about this time of my life but I can guarantee you it is not the essence of my core but more a time of disillusionment. I'm not much of a bar person, don't drink, don't smoke, and don't like the smell. Also this was a 3 year out of 52 year life. And even though many of my friends still do this I am the designated driver happily.

If only all we had to worry about were the obvious scammers.

You're still making assumptions that most people are like those you've encountered in bars. Either from your own experiences, or from the stories you've said you've heard. That's fine. You can think whatever you'd like. You and I are much different, so it's not hard to imagine that we have different experiences. If you're not a bar person, no worries. Not everyone is the same. But, there's no need to put those down/act as if they're doing the wrong thing just because it's not something you enjoy.

If I've misunderstood you and you'd like to make things more clear, go for it. I am not going to grill you in order to see if you mean something other than what you've said, though.

I found this a little odd, though:



Getting laid and people groping you/throwing themselves at you are different things, though.

She's a woman who knows what she wants.

My apologies! The people who I met in bars were this way. I have no other experience to base another opinion on. Saying people in bars are not this way for myself would not be an honest statement. Others can make that statement based on a different experience but I can not and this is a thread about saying what we want and feel is the truth to us.

I think you misunderstood again. I'm not telling you not to think some people are the way you think. I'm just letting you know that not all people are the way you think. That's all.

Boy are you having a tough time with this. Should we seek counseling?

Emily, is that a Hipastatic app photo?