Community > Jokes & Funny Stories

Topic: Funny/Weird/Favorite Pickup Lines
Lôôking4U Joined Mon 10/29/07 Posts: 3921	Thu 08/05/10 06:17 AM
You, me, a sheet of visqueen and a gallon of olive oil, what do you say?

bushwalker Joined Mon 07/26/10 Posts: 127	Thu 08/05/10 06:57 AM
Your eyes are like diamonds. Cold and hard. Your teeth are like stars. They come out at night.

Spleggie Joined Mon 11/26/07 Posts: 3885	Thu 08/05/10 07:29 PM
Is your dad a baker cause you got great buns Are those astronaut pants, cause your *** is outta this world Lets rearrange the alpahbet and put u and i together

Tribbles Joined Tue 11/17/09 Posts: 7349	Thu 08/05/10 07:56 PM
You must work at Subway, cuz you just gave me a footlong!

jp_greenville13 Joined Sat 12/27/08 Posts: 21	Tue 08/10/10 10:15 PM
I lost my teddy bear. Will you sleep with me? Nice shoes. Wanna ****?

Dancere Joined Sun 04/06/08 Posts: 14561	Tue 08/10/10 10:27 PM
The oddest one that really stuck w/ me ... : "You look like you'd be someone's girlfriend ... " Huh ... ???????????????????????

tigercub Joined Mon 11/03/08 Posts: 5	Wed 08/11/10 03:36 AM
Wanna play army? lie down & i'll blow u

mbcasey Joined Wed 02/14/07 Posts: 1805	Wed 08/11/10 08:29 AM
Oldie but a goodie... If I told you that you have a beautiful body, would you hold it against me?

Dancere Joined Sun 04/06/08 Posts: 14561	Wed 08/11/10 12:54 PM Edited by Dancere on Wed 08/11/10 12:55 PM
One right arse would not stop sayin': "Did it hurt ... Did it hurt when ya fell from Heaven" Over and over and over ... W/ a feigned hillbilly affectation right out of "Deliverance" Dunno who's eye I more wanted to stick a fork in - his or mine ... Edit: Oh, wait, yes, I did know ... =[

jp_greenville13 Joined Sat 12/27/08 Posts: 21	Wed 08/11/10 02:51 PM
nice legs. what time do they open?

venusenvy Joined Sat 07/31/10 Posts: 2984	Wed 08/11/10 02:54 PM
This thread is frickin hilarious

tigercub Joined Mon 11/03/08 Posts: 5	Wed 08/11/10 05:16 PM
Does i'm in the police i could be shot & killed 2mo so u should come back to mine with me count? what kinda girl falls 4 that

tigercub Joined Mon 11/03/08 Posts: 5	Wed 08/11/10 05:18 PM
I'm not feeling myself tonight can i feel you?

crossroad123 Joined Sat 06/12/10 Posts: 3299	Wed 08/11/10 06:00 PM Edited by crossroad123 on Wed 08/11/10 06:01 PM
Excuse me would you like to play bear well bend over and growl and I will throw you the meat

BtownNative Joined Tue 08/03/10 Posts: 85	Thu 08/12/10 12:58 AM
Used on 2 people: "Hey, let's play a game. You can be Peanut, she'll be Butter, and I'll be Jelly. And you know what, I'm thinking we should make a PB&J sandwich. " And the infamous: "Can I get some of that?" this topic is hilarious

BtownNative Joined Tue 08/03/10 Posts: 85	Thu 08/12/10 09:14 PM
oh, there's always the misogynistic "it won't s*ck itself" I need to try that "nice shoes" one

redhead44613 Joined Fri 01/18/08 Posts: 12976	Thu 08/12/10 10:57 PM
Guy: Hey you wanna get a pizza and f*** Girl: No Guy: What you don't like pizza?

fenway2k Joined Wed 02/11/09 Posts: 259	Sat 08/14/10 12:42 AM
Wanna play army? lie down & i'll blow u OMG if a woman used that on me I would either think I'd have died and went to Heaven.... Or I would start looking for Ashton Kutcher

fenway2k Joined Wed 02/11/09 Posts: 259	Sat 08/14/10 12:46 AM
were you raised on a chicken farm? cuz you sure know how to raise a ****. (; Ok, I'll bite. raise a what? egg? Obviously that one flew by me so fast I missed it in the blink. I can't believe no one helped this poor person out... The missing word is word that starts with a 'c' and can describe both a chicken and a male organ....

motophotodude Joined Sun 09/27/09 Posts: 35	Sun 08/15/10 06:38 AM
Hey I have some great wine and cheese do you want to have sex?