So would anyone get involved with anyone who did not tell you that they had debts, that they were not making any payments?

I would not, as that’s a lie and if there going to lie about that to you then what else are they going to lie about?


but if they did tell you would you get involved with them ?

Thats a good point. You know your not going to talk about that on a date.

This happened to me. He did not tell me that he was having financial problems. He never thought this was dishonest.

Not on a "date" but at a certain point if you are thinking about living together it needs to be discussed. Money can be a very emotional issue for some people.

If its starts to get serious between you both then, do you think you must come clean so you both know where you stand with each other?

Would you discuss debt on a first date?
That would be an awkward situation.

I have debt and am not making payments. Because that's what the lawyer told me to do. I'm slowly paying for a bankruptcy. Life happens, and suddenly you are making half of what you used to make. Sometimes life is more important that killing yourself at a job just because of the pay.

You want to be told, huh?

But, can you handle it?

However, I would agree that not informing is still a lie, without regard to whether the person being informed can handle the answer or not.

Debts, will do nothing to you, except that they will reduce the other side real earnings. You simply sign an agreement stating that those debts are forever to belong to this or that side...blah blah bla...

Hell yes I wouldn't want to be past broke.

Amen.

I won't tell my finances to someone unless I'm serious about them. It's private to me.

Not making any form of payment is not good, btw.

If they lied about it, heck I wouldn't get involved with them


If they told the truth, maybe I will amd make them pay the debt

Thats really not any concern to my date. It's MY business and not anyone elses. It's something that I have to deal with, not anyone else. How would that be a lie?

People get in over their head, and Im not one to judge. I will not however pay for THEIR debts.

Fact is most us are in debt these days!!

Why not honey?

haha

This is a serious issue. It also becomes more of a problem the older you become. I think the best way to address this is to NOT rush into a financial commitment with a new man or woman. Keep your finances SEPARATE.

"Thou shalt not combine resources or finances"

Thats my newly invented commandment. There is no reason to make such a grievous error. If you're new mate is insisting that you share credit cards or bank accounts right away, thats a red flag. I have gold balls credit and the main reason I have this at 36 is I NEVER co-signed for a man on ANYTHING.

very good answer.

If I am just dating the person, then no I don't think it is my business. Now if there is a relationship forming then I believe I have a right to know.
I have worked hard to keep my credit in the high scores and well I would like to keep it there.

second good answer

it seems that some people really have an understanding of what someone with bad credit and debts can do to there life's.

if you keep control of the money cashflow and overheads in check you can live very will.