Congrats Gypsy, of course I'm a little jealous of the guy.

He sent six cards? Wow, I think I got six total from everyone I know. How many more hoops do you have for him to jump through?

I dont make him jump through any hoops!!! He is just a really great guy!!!

NO HOOPS????

Do you have a sister?

Ya......but she is 3 years older, and married and NOTHING LIKE ME!!!

Just my luck...

Just out of curiosity. How many dates do the men feel are appropriate before intimate contact should begin to take place and how many dates would a woman feel should happen before touching and kissing is permissible?

I figured this might give us a gauge of sorts.

Well Krimsa, I can answer for (some of) the men. When I was young and we were socialized into the act of dating and courtship (by modern standards) we were given the three date rule. That after the third date, you should try to, uh, hit the sheets.

Now as lockerroom talk goes I'll add one more chestnut (given to me by a senior when I was a sophmore): "If you haven't gotten into her panties by date six you move onto other chicks." I know with it rymhing like that someone else had to hear it.

Now, since I brought up the old school dating, I'll add what I was taught by my Grandfathers: when a woman is ready for you to become more "physical," she will let you know.

It is this latter rule that I tend to follow, and this is the same rule that lands me in "The Friend Zone."

I would need to agree with your grandfather on that. However, if a woman was forcing you to wait and wait and wait and was not allowing even the slightest sample of affection like a kiss or a hand, then I would probably ask her what was happening. That seems only fitting and there would probably be a reason for it. Usually early on in a relationship there is an overall sense of how things are going.

I don't have a set number of dates. It's a subjective and relative thing, depending on the dynamics involved, but if I begin to feel frustrated or exasperated I back away and put it down to her loss.
It's happened before that after I have backed away, I've recieved a call saying something like "what happened? I thought you liked me" and my response is "I do like you but I don't like feeling used". I'm quite happy just being friends, and do want to give a lady the opportunity to get to really know me, but if there comes a point along the way where I begin doubting that "more than friends" isn't a likelyhood, I'll adjust my attitude accordingly.

I would agree that its probably not fair for a woman to use a man indefinitely for gifts and courtship if she has no intention of taking the relationship beyond that stage. I think the point being made is its a two way street. A man can not simply expect to "buy a woman" or rush her along simply because he is eager to have sexual contact.

There must be something dreadfully wrong because I find myself in total agreement with you this time Krimsa.

No pre requisite amount of time for me when it feels right for both you usualy know it, with some it was the first date with others was after weeks or months.

I tend to take a while. It can be upwards of 3 months. Generally there is a gradual warming up period that will consist of a LOT of foreplay. I guess every woman is just different in that respect.

I've heard of one couple dating for 4 years, before sex and marrage. They really got to know each other.

Wow. I don't think I ever thought about it that way. I guess because it never occurred to me to allow a man to continue to try and gain my affections if I was not feeling something for him as well.

It's always interesting to see things from the other side from time to time.

In my world it is.

I would rather die a virgin gentleman. I've been on a lotta dates and been dumped and abused for bein the "nice guy". But I'm old fashioned, and with the millions and billions o gals in the world there is bound to be one for me.

Ive met a man on here who was raised a Christian. He is now 60 and a virgin though he regrets it all. He is trying desperately to find a woman now. Sad.

wow...a 60 yr old virgin????? although its been so long for me I think Im a born again virgin

Me to. Im pushing a year now.