Community > Posts By > Loves2Please

 
Loves2Please's photo
Sun 03/04/07 11:48 PM
no no ,,,,no rubber ducky this time,,maybe next time,,lol,,lmao

Loves2Please's photo
Sun 03/04/07 11:47 PM
Beauty is only in the one that has words so deep and the feeling of this
poem is to the heart,,and I feel lifted as I read on to know that there
are more out there with the same feeling,,,love to all here,,,and yes
great poem,,,,,

Loves2Please's photo
Sun 03/04/07 11:29 PM

Two young boys were picked up by the cops for smoking dope and appeared
in court on Friday before the judge. The judge said, "You seem like nice
young boys, and I'd like to give you a second chance rather than some
hard jail time. I want you to go out this weekend and try to show others
the evils of drug use and get them to give up drugs forever. I'll see
you back in court on Monday morning, bright and early."

The two boys where in court that Monday morning, and the judge asked the
first one, "So, How did you do over the weekend?"

"Well, your honor," he replied, "I persuaded 22 people to give up drugs
forever."

"22 people? That's amazing. How'd you accomplish such a feat?"

"I used a diagram, your honor. I drew two circles and told them the big
circle is your brain before drugs, and the small circle is your brain
after drugs."

"That's admirable," said the judge.

"And you, how did you do?" he asked the second boy.

"Well, your honor, I persuaded 214 people to give up drugs forever."

"214 people! That's unbelieveable! How on earth did you manage to do
that?"

"Well, I used a similar approach," he answered. "I drew a large and a
small circle. Pointing to the small circle, I said, this is your azzhole
before you go to prison..........."

Loves2Please's photo
Sun 03/04/07 10:56 PM

Three ducks went into court. The judge called the first one to the
stand.

"What is your name?" he asked.

"Quack." the duck answered.

"And why were you arrested?" the judge asked.

"I was blowing bubbles." he answered.

The judge didn't see anything wrong with that, so he dismissed the duck
and called up the next one.

"What's your name?" he asked.

"Quack," the duck answered.

"Why were you arrested?" the Judge asked.

"I was blowing bubbles." the duck replied.

Again, the judge saw nothing offensive, so he called up the next duck.

"What's your name?? No wait, let me guess, Quack." he said.

"No," said the duck, "My name is Bubbles."

Loves2Please's photo
Sun 03/04/07 10:51 PM
lol I know and thats what make everyone so great here ,,taking on the
jokes and feeling good,,even from the dirty south,,,love to all here....

Loves2Please's photo
Sun 03/04/07 10:45 PM
gut hurts,,thanks for that one,,lol

Loves2Please's photo
Sun 03/04/07 10:44 PM
to damn funny,,you go girl,,keep them coming....

Loves2Please's photo
Sun 03/04/07 10:40 PM
I mite not be from Texas,,but I can say some of the people there are
cool as sshhiitt,,,,,,,,even in Austin.....and anyone that rides a 2000
pound bull is crazy as ffuukk...so hells no I would not mess with
them,,lol,,then again,,hmmmm Love to all here

Loves2Please's photo
Sun 03/04/07 10:31 PM
Hmmmm Harly,,,let me check on that,,lol,,

Loves2Please's photo
Sun 03/04/07 10:30 PM
I think I would be done just by having the thought,,lol,,then
again,,hell call that cheap gas....

Loves2Please's photo
Sun 03/04/07 10:29 PM


Maria is a devout church going woman. She gets married and has 17
children. Then her husband dies. She remarries two weeks later, and has
22 children by her next husband. Then he dies. A while later, she dies.
At the funeral, the priest looks skyward and says, "At last they're
finally together."

A guy sitting in the front row says, "Excuse me Father, but do you mean
her and her first husband, or her and her second husband?"

"I mean her legs!"

Loves2Please's photo
Sun 03/04/07 10:13 PM


A big-city California lawyer went duck hunting in rural Texas. He shot
and dropped a bird, but it fell into a farmer's field on the other side
of a fence. As the lawyer climbed over the fence, an elderly farmer
drove up on his tractor and asked him what he was doing. The litigator
responded, "I shot a duck and it fell into this field, and now I'm going
to retrieve it."

The old farmer replied, "This is my property, and you are not coming
over here."

The indignant lawyer said, "I am one of the best trial attorneys in the
U.S. and, if you don't let me get that duck, I'll sue you and take
everything you own."

The old farmer smiled and said, "Apparently, you don't know how we do
things in Texas. We settle small disagreements like this with the Texas
Three-Kick-Rule."

The lawyer asked, What is the Texas Three-Kick-Rule?."

The farmer replied, "Well, first I kick you three times and then you
kick me three times, and so on, back and forth, until someone gives up."

The attorney quickly thought about the proposed contest and decided that
he could easily take the old codger. He agreed to abide by the local
custom. The old farmer slowly climbed down from the tractor and walked
up to the city feller. His first kick planted the toe of his heavy work
boot into the lawyer's groin and dropped him to his knees. His second
kick nearly wiped the man's nose off his face. The barrister was flat on
this belly when the farmer's third kick to a kidney nearly caused him to
give up.

The lawyer summoned every bit of his will and managed to get to his feet
and said, "OK, you old coot! now, it's my turn." The old farmer smiled
and said, "No I give up, you can have the duck.

Loves2Please's photo
Sun 03/04/07 10:04 PM
wouldnt have that taste if you had a job,,lol,,lmao

Loves2Please's photo
Sun 03/04/07 10:03 PM
lol

Loves2Please's photo
Sun 03/04/07 05:31 PM
FOUUUUUUURRRRRRR,,,oh hold on I mean KAWASAKI..lol

Loves2Please's photo
Sun 03/04/07 05:29 PM
Drink up everyone,,

Loves2Please's photo
Sun 03/04/07 05:29 PM
hey there one thing on going down on a woman ,,and anothere on smelling
what love you have for me,,lol,,lmao

Loves2Please's photo
Sun 03/04/07 05:27 PM
it a hard life out there being a lil boy,,lol

Loves2Please's photo
Sun 03/04/07 12:52 PM
I cant seem to think why I would run,,lol

Loves2Please's photo
Sun 03/04/07 12:02 PM
hmmm if theres a mamma how about yo daddy,,hell we need some good ones
here anyone up for it....Love is all we have for each other,,

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