Topic: One GLORIOUS profile | |
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"I am 20yrs old 5'5 brown hair hazel eyes. I love to go on walks and write poetry. I also like to watch movies. I like a man with a head on his shoulders."
Otherwise he's dead. |
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this one I read this morning!!!!!!! Why can't a man ever please a woman? Because no man has a penis made of chocolate which ejaculates money!! |
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"i love blue-eyed blondes or green-eyed redheads if i dont find a girl lik rthat then ill judge her based on her traits"
Guess I'm getting judged on my traits with this guy! |
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===>>o<<===
"I'm Cool. If you find you agree, we'll be glad." Interesting. |
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I have seen so much silliness and ignorance on profiles that I try to block them out directly after reading... Thank you all for unlocking all the wonderful memories!!!!!
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"ok...so b4 u read on there is sumthin u MUST know.... God comes first in my life... not U,my momma or my daddy but God....i am who i am becuz of what he's done...and i bet that scared a million guys"
Apparently He completely forgot about the "education" thing.... Make that a million and one.... |
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"blonde hair, green eyes, atheltic... i have a daughter thats almost 11 mo old looking for open relationship"
You think she's ready for that? |
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"i always hate these description parts. but any ways im 22 year olds. i attend college. im gettin my assicoates degree hopefully very soon. im a preschool teacher at a daycare"
Hey, look, everybody, another teacher who can't spell! Good luck with that assicoates degree, whatever that is. It's when you sit in wet paint. You get ass-coats. |
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"This is awkward, because I recognized half the people on here."
That's because those are all your other profiles. Sy-Bil! Sy-Bil! Sy-Bil! Sy-Bil! Sy-Bil! SYBIL!!!! |
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"Hi I am looking for a sweethearted guy to help me rise my one year old daughter"
The kids name doesn't happen to be Lazarus does it? And does the person you're looking for happen to be Jesus? |
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"im ashley and im 5'6 and 5'7"
Look, I don't come here to do math.... There are three kinds of people in the world: Those who understand math and those who don't. |
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"I am a 19 yr old. I dont drink, but every couple of months I have a 1 yr old son."
How does THAT work? Damn aliens are taking our dates now too! No WONDER I never get lucky! I nearly cracked a rib on this one. I nominate this for GRAND PRIZE! Best of Show! |
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"I am 20yrs old 5'5 brown hair hazel eyes. I love to go on walks and write poetry. I also like to watch movies. I like a man with a head on his shoulders."
Otherwise he's dead. But is that one on each?? |
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"blonde hair, green eyes, atheltic... i have a daughter thats almost 11 mo old looking for open relationship"
You think she's ready for that? I say we hook the kid up with the 1 year old aliens that pop out every couple months... |
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Here's a guy already in a bad relationship and apparently looking for another ... His profile says looking for woman for dating...
Well I'm 25 In a really bad relationship (no pitty party needed) and I have a daughter that is my everything! I work hard and play harder I love my profession and am very succesful at what I do. I work a ton of hours so I don't have alot of free time to get a chance to find someone new to get to know. If you would like to know more just drop me a line and maybe we could chat sometime. |
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This one is not from this site but it does exist out there:
"I DON'T NEED A MAN!!....but I'd like to find someone who might become my best friend and........" Well, perhaps a pot of water, a nice kitchen and a pet rabbit to boil? When someone is going all caps and yelling that they don't need a man (or woman) on a singles site I can't help but think it's not that unlike walking up to a water fountain and yelling, "I DON"T NEED WATER." Technically we get it, need vs. want, but wow way to be open to a possibility. :) Drew |
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"I DON'T NEED A MAN!!... Methinks thou protesteth too much ! |
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Ohhh yeah! Hey Lex, what about the people searching for their "Sole Mate"?!?! Is she looking for a guy who looks good in her pumps? Or is he searching for a dame who likes his steel-toe construction boots? |
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Ohhh yeah! Hey Lex, what about the people searching for their "Sole Mate"?!?! Is she looking for a guy who looks good in her pumps? Or is he searching for a dame who likes his steel-toe construction boots? Yeah, I love those. I thought maybe that was about fish. "Filet of Sole Mate." I also like when they say they're looking for a "sweatheart." |
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Sweatheart.... just look for anyone going with the "Few Extra Pounds" selection. I'm gonna get some feedback on this one... |
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