"Well, here I am revamping this description. I want a man who can communicate both in person,on the phone and by answering messages sent to them."

Both of those, huh?

"My description of myself is best told from what others say about me."

Then how is it YOUR description of yourself?

"This may be harsh but if your not serious about getting to know me or justing trying to get laid, don't waste your or my time."

You mean jousting, right? I'm serious about jousting.

"I do not like pushy people, so just take it easy."

Sorry, I don't know what came over me....

"I'm looking for a goog man."

Well, sure, who isn't?

"I am a hardworking woman who gives 110% in all aspects of my life."

And who is apparently conversant with the most banal cliches in sports terminology, too.

Found a couple funny ones...

"I am a man, not a large man but not a tiny man. I like to keep things simple, no drinking, smoking for me. I believe in more types of pure fun, something I can remember and appreciate."

Oh you enigma you!

Here's the other one.

"About Me
a majority of the time i spend hanging out in my mind, searching for new ideas and trying to grow as a person. that may not be horribly exciting but i think my hobbies are at least slightly entertaining. my main interest is music, either listening to it and reflecting or writing it.. i really love playing guitar and creating sounds with synthesizers. i also spend a large chunk of my days playing video games.

i may have much more potential than i realize, which is to say i could be viewed as aloof, or lazy. the problem is that it is easy for me to accept situations and deal, however i am always working on applying myself more so that i can continue to press onward.

First Date
anything really, it doesn't even need to be a "date."

"Hi. This is my second attempt at this site. I'm going to try without a photo to see if i atract with my words over my appearance."


"I have a good job as a bell-ringer at the Notre Dame Cathedral...."

I believe page 50 of this thread has been the best so far. Thank you Lex. It made me giggle.

Thank you. It's good to know that my deranged and obsessive need to make fun of people's writing skills (or lack thereof) can bring us all closer together.

At least the ones who can write!

"I AM STUBBORN, MOUTHY, VERY SARCASTIC, AND I NEVER THINK BEFORE I SPEAK."

I might as well be dating myself then....

"wanted:someone i can't live without
iwantsomeoneiwantsomeone i want someone iwant someone."


Hang on, I'm not sure I understand what you're trying to say....

"Hi! This is kind of ackward."

It sure is.

"she's different. she dosent care what others think. She does what she wants, wears what she wants, says what she wants.She's the most outgoing girl you will ever meet."

Great! Who the hell is she?

"I would like to know something guys.. what is your definition of a REAL woman??? Do any of you know?????"

Someone who's not on MySpace?

Or is this a trick question?

"I'm interested in finding a man with a good heart and stable mental fiber..."

That sounds just like me!

Oh, I'm sorry, I thought that said "stable mental fibber"....

"I feel that I have to change what I have said about myself."

Go ahead, I don't think it will make much difference.

"I'm drawing a big blank here. This should be easy. I keep writing and deleting."

If you skip the "deleting" part, you'll still have stuff on there for people to read.

"!960 Sport Model: Low miles,dependable,one previous owner,looks good when polished,will last for years if treated properly,all original parts INCLUDING HEADLIGHTS"

Sexy car metaphors. Ooooooh.

Do I get to kick the tires? And put a sticker on the bumper?