"
Concur; my actions in the beginning were absolutely my own. In the middle and the end....not so much.

My true self would never commit armed robbery. I would never hit someone with my car. I would never kidnap and tape and tie another.
In my own mind I would never hire someone to injure another.
In my own mind, I would never try and kill myself.
Under the influence of drugs.....anything can happen. And usually does.

As I have said....my story is long and shameful. And a mind that hasn't been deadened...will never place themselves in predicaments that I have. The drugs will and do kill our humanity. So much so...that I did not recognize myself.

Kat
Kat

lemme just go to the hospital and get those cancer patients in a self help program

Nice point, doc.

jonlaw, keep it rollin, this thread is depicting reality. You all are maintaining equilibrium, quite inspiring y'all!

"
cancer is a disease, are you all seriously telling me that alcoholism and drug addiction are on the same field as cancer?

in my eyes, and the eyes of many, you are hurting your own cause by speaking as if it were.

"
listen... i'm not at all trying to lessen you lot's victory over addiction. if anything, my way of thinking is better imo. you were responsible for your addictions and your actions just as you are now. you have beaten something that's hard. you yourself and noone else. you've shown that you have the strength to overcome.

don't cheapen it by saying it was anything but you

I can not see that in the eyes of many do you actually believe your own bull****

"

shut the .... up

That was lame

aint is in the dictionary

Ain't is an informal/slang word in a book about words that are spoken by people.

The Diagnostic Statistical Manual is a book of diagnoses that were researched heavily by the medical community.

Comparing those two books is like comparing apples and oranges.

"
Isn't it amazing what can come from jail?

THE LIFE
This is the life, if you don't say "nope" and you've dedicated you're life to dope.
Whether you snort, slam or smoke a glass dic. You've sold you're soul to something really SICK.
You don't notice, but you're life will change. You'll become scarey, and something strange.
People offer you food, thinking of you're condition.
They see you all torn up from malnutrition.
Once again you pass the food on the table, and go to another issue, for now you are able.
You spin around town thinking you are cool.
Puck what they think, you're nobody's fool.
But one by one, people leave you alone.
Their starting to see the monster you've grown.
First it's you're friends, you're kids, you're husband or wife............ you're convinced you
don't need them trashing you're life.
Then one day you realize they are all part of a conspiracy.
You shake that thought and do another blast.
Thinking and wondering, how long will this last?
What once was days now have no length.
You're habits roll on growing in strength.
Now you get a brainstorm and think you should deal.
Now---------The Sheit just took a turn.
You've jumped into the fire and started to burn.
At first you're shaken and taken, and treated like a lame.
But before long you're hip to the game.
First thing you realize and this is a must. Is that you are the only only one that you can trust.
Now all you're time is spent making rounds.
First quarters, grams, then ounces and pounds.
Now on to the last chapter of the book.
Ha! You decide you're gonna be a cook.
You know in you're heart it's gonna be trouble.
Sitting in the lab watching the bubble.
Now things in the life are too freaking intense.
You think what happened? It doesnt make sense.
Then one night you're sitting and minding the store.
When 16 punk cops come crashing through the door!
They slam you down with their feet in you're chest.
And say "Hello stupid" You're under arrest!
You know it's all over when you get to court.
There's 15 informants on you're report.
While you walk the yard you have time to reflect, on how your life has become so wrecked.
Then suddenly you have flashes like a neon sign..........hey there brother, want another line?
Suddenly you realize in a world of strife.
The price is heavy for living " the life"


Kat

Just stopping by to give Jon a huge hug......Thanks for the vent yesterday it did a world of good......It amazes me how the Lord knows exactly when you need something and in your path it goes.

Thanks

"


Thank -you we all helped eachother and I repect your story and value your input I will remember your brother in my prayers.

Everyone one here has helped me remain clean and sober one more day.

thanks for the share scttrbrain......I just love and respect you more.....didn't think possible....but it is.