Wongo says to do whatever you need to do to keep healthy!!

Hey Winx,

U avoidin me?

Caveman

I love the road to happy destiny. There are so many good passages. I really love the section on Dr. Bob's nightmare and how Dr. Bob and Bill first met. Sometimes when I beat myself over the head to much it is almost like a V-8. It is like gees, I am an addict and an alcoholic. What used to normal was to get drunk and to get stoned. I also like the section on Easy Does It but do it. I wouldn't trade my best when I was using and drugging for my worse day in recovery. On my worse days I can atleast say I didn't take that first fix or first drink. I am not self-medicating today. I am not qualified for physician heal thyself because I have a tendency to over prescribe. For one is too many and a thousand is never enough. Great to see the thread is still going. What is cool is that our one meeting place for AA is upstairs and our one meeting for NA is downstairs. We sometimes have a real tradeoff for our combined seventh tradition in both groups since somebody is always forgetting sugar, cream, coffee and cups.

Yes it is good to see this still going as sometimes I just come here and read the posts and am reminded I am not alone.

I have met someone here and that has complicated things a little in my life and I am still not sure if its to the better or not. my family is concerned because they really do not want me to get hurt or relapsed but I,m a big boy and whatever happens I know I have friend right here I can turn to for advice or even experience so again thanks for being here each and everyone of you.

You have been clean how long?

Kat

Jonlaw,

Will it be difficult to concentrate on yourself so early in recovery with this new situation? You are your priority.

They say 1 year sober is best before making big decisions.
If its just dating, it may be OK. Remember to take care of the HALT/ Hungry~Angry~Lonely~Tired. Sponsors help tremendously.

Doc Bob's Friend.

My sponsor told me to remember K.I.S.S. when my life gets too complicated, Jon. I hope you are doing okay, today.

Life is good today. Sponsors are great, ain't they?

Bearsman (returns)

KEEP IT SIMPLE STUPID....

Kat

KEEP IT SIMPLE STUPID....

Kat


I do not particularly like the KISS acronym. It is too negative for me, so I try looking for the positive. Maybe it can be rephrased differenly like; KEEP IT SIMPLE STUBBORN.

Any suggestions?

The man for change (vote for me)

Bearsman

Hey Everyone thanks for the valuable feedback and yes I really need to focus on myself for awhile. We have ended this relationship and I have deleted this person from my contacts. I actually feel relieved because deep down I knew I was headed to disaster and so I talked with my niece who has been sober for 11 years now and made the decision after talking to the lady in my relationship. I am not going to get into detail about why this occurred as I do not have a right to feel better at anothers expense. Anyway thank you all and will check in later.

Yeah, Bear. They are great. I remember my first sponsor. He said that I had beautiful veins. What a compliment, eh? He had to wear support hose because he had just about ruint all of the veins in his legs from using a needle. I had written a 28 page fourth step and did my fifth step with him. He didn't even read my little novel. Funny thing was I had such a hard time starting the fourth step but once I got into it I just kept on writing. I was going to write the fourth step to end all fourth steps. One of my counselors thought it was a good start because it was just full of resentment against my dad. I sent the work to my dad and dad corrected all the typos. Then he drove up to see me at the treatment center. We had a good visit for about the first time in my life. I got my say in. I grew up terrorfied of the man. Later, I found out that you don't just do the fourth step one time. I found out with that first sponsor that sponsors are not infalliable. I was going through a treatment center infatuation and he helped me when she left and tore my heart out. He helped me to recover. Next week, I will be damned if he wasn't going through an infatuation and I was there for him. The K.I.S.S. acronym got to me, too. I have been hearing lately at the meetings that you aren't suppose to sponsor you sponsor.

Trout,

Wherever two or three are gathered in (the higher power of your choice here) there shall I be among them.

One alcoholic talking with another, sharing experience strength and hope.

Bob's friend

hello all, it's been awhile since I posted. I have a friend who violated his parole (DWI) and has spent the last 5 mo. finishing jail time. I met him this summer at a small town celebration. He was drinking and I didn't know he was a recovering alcoholic. He slipped off the wagon and ended up in detox and failed to make it to his parole officer's weekly meeting. I had three weeks to get to know him and we were hitting it off until everything happened. I'm scared to death, cuz he gets out next Mon. and wants to know if we can see each other.

I'm wondering if I should not start anything w/ him, cuz he may need rehab (he doesn't think so). I want him to NOT WANT TO DRINK, FOR HIMSELF... NOT CUZ I WANT HIM TO STOP. Is that a smart thing???

chances are the only way he's going to stop drinking is if he does it for himself. I don't suggest getting back together with him. At least not until he gets the help he needs. chances are if he continues to drink he will continue to have problems.

"


Hi again and nice to see you again. Yes its not only the smart thing to do its probably the only way he is going to quit. Alcohol is more powerful than even love to a alcoholic just ask anyone who is in Alanon. my prayers will be with the both of you and please keep comming .

I usually use subtle suggestion about this type of question. However, your friend is in need of an honesty check. He has to have a desire to stop drinking for himself.

The Big Book says on page, 20 and 21:

Now these are commonplace observations on drinkers which we hear all the time. Back of them is a world of ignorance and misunderstanding. We see that these expressions refer to people whose reactions are very different from ours.
Moderate drinkers have little trouble in giving up liquor entirely if they have good reason for it. They can take it or leave it alone.
Then we have a certain type of hard drinker. He may have the habit badly enough to gradually impair him physically and mentally. It may cause him to die a few years before his time. If a sufficiently strong reason - ill health, falling in love, change of environment, or the warning of a doctor - becomes operative, this man can also stop or moderate, although he may find it difficult and troublesome and may even need medical attention.
But what about the real alcoholic? He may start off as a moderate drinker; he may or may not become a continuous hard drinker; but at some stage of his drinking career he begins to lose all control of his liquor consumption, once he starts to drink.
Here is the fellow who has been puzzling you, especially in his lack of control. He does absurd, incredible, tragic things while drinking. He is a real Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde. He is seldom mildly intoxicated. He is always more or less insanely drunk. His disposition while drinking resembles his normal nature but little....... He uses his gifts to build up a bright outlook for his family and himself, and then pulls the structure down on his head by a senseless series of sprees.

I always suggest to my sponsees not to make important decisions and not to go steady with any one women. I say woman, because I don't work step 13.

From me it is a definite, NO!

Cave

step #13??????? Women vs woman????? Not following.
Good advise though thanks