I think there is irony to be found in this, however.

I myself grew up during a time of great foment over prejudice, and through many efforts to decrease it. One thing I noticed from the beginning, which may be getting worse again right now, is that many individual instances of interracial or intercultural difficulties, are actually made much worse, by people "calling others out" about it.

This is especially the case, because I have again directly witnessed many instances, where the reason for the accusation of racial prejudice was made, was because the person making the accusation was themselves racist, and didn't realize it.

And then of course, race played a part in the many-faceted situations in my twenteen years, where lots of people were playing trick and game after trick and game with each other's psychology, entirely in order to "hit it and quit it." In the case of race-based tricks, the fact that lots of people WERE actively trying to overcome any sense of prejudice in themselves, was used by "player" after "player," to guilt-trip them in to going with someone, and doing things with them, despite not actually liking them, and despite the fact that they were clearly being used.

The short of all that, is that I think it is a defective strategy, to accuse people of being afraid to date outside their race. Any change to their behavior in response to that accusation, will not be a logical one, it will be something less than honest, and less than honorable. No one should decide about others based on fears associated with other people entirely, but nor should anyone decide to go with someone to try to "prove a point."

I SO appreciate my mother! When I was dating a beautiful Jamaican girl, my backwoods Missouri bigot Grandmother said, "Don't you think he should stick with his *own kind*?"

...My mother said, "I'm SO PROUD OF YOU MOM!.....that you would champion my son if he were gay! I had no idea you were so progressive."

(I wasn't there). My sister told me the story. I *literally * fell on the ground laughing!

hello

Ernestly speaking, thats the plain truth nothing more and nothing less

maybe they are not afraid.. they just don't want to

Its not for me..
When I see a white dude with an asian female..ugh..
yep, looks like I'm a racist..
then I wonder what is wrong with the white dude, that he can't get a white girl..sorry folks.. Like should stay with like, IMHO

hi

hi

I have no issues with people that want to date.
Personally I go for women I find attractive, doesn't matter her skin color.

Anymore, seems I just repel any women I find attractive.

now thats funny,,,'own kind'


always makes me wonder what 'kind' is that? intelligent kind, moral kind, successful kind, loving kind or merely 'kind' of race,,,,

hi

I don't know why really older men are more interested in black young women . what's with that do you find them easier to date than your own race? here in Africa 60 year old men ( pensioners ) are the trend with 20 something year old women. it may be love to both parties but few will believe it is love

Ew

Wow, happy to hear that, I wish I will find my perfect match too

Am new in here, wish to find my perfect match regardless who he is or where he's from or the name he call God, all I care about is love, care and attention

The first time I dated interracially, I was in my young twenties

I was never raised to have a stern BIAS against the idea of people who aren't "black' in terms of dating. So I had never been one of the ones who said I would NEVER date this race or that race. The issue was more one of youth and environment. I did not live someplace where it was common for a person to consider something other than what they were 'used' to, which in a primarily segregated world,, was usually same race.

As I left high school and started college, I was exposed to more and surrounded by others who also were exposed to more. The possibility of compatibility beyond ONE race became more of an option to me.

Physically, I was never attracted to paler skin or thinner lips but I was attracted to many other things. It so happened my best friend introduced me to someone with man of those 'other' things that I AM attracted to, mostly character traits, that made his physical features no longer the focus and actually , I think, made him APPEAR even more handsome to me.

Anyway, He was Serbian and had come to the country at the age of 10. His interests and values and 'culture' of struggle and overcoming were very close to my own. We hit it off immediately and I realized how silly the notion of 'race' when seeking compatibility with COMPLEX individuals really was.

Since then, I've dated Italians, a german man and a Welsh man and would not change any (except maybe the welshman, but only cause he turned out to be quite emotionally unstable)


for me, having the same race is irrelevant, having similar 'culture' is much more an issue.

I think that interracial dating is beautiful

Identity is key.. Especially if u are so called black because we are the only race whos history is a mystery... Up to this day even racism is still amongst the tongue of many. If you dont who you are or where you stand in this life as a black man or black women then interracial companionship is just a way of rejecting yourself subconsciously to support a modern day way of thinking.
I am not a racist but I wouldn't date a white women even if she ticks all the boxes.. There will always b a box untickable.. we are not the same... By nature somewhat yes, in spirit.. no. I would feel incomplete.

there will always be a box untickable

with any potential partner,, none will tick 'all' boxes,

everyone is different though, I do not feel anyone else will make me any more complete,, that is something I have to do for myself

Don't forget about human nature: a lot of our "race" preferences come from simple physical imprinting as youngsters.

(Based on the assumption of a two parent upbringing):

A child will find attractive what they have been brought up with.

A girl will "imprint" on the physical image of her father who she associates with love & caring (he is the male that she has seen in a romantic connection with her mother).

A boy will "imprint" on the physical image of his mother for the same reasons.

If they see no other physical type of couples (all relatives are of one race) then that is what they will seek out as adults.

Unfortunately this also works when it comes to negative personality traits such as abuse etc (why the children of abusers become abusers or accept abuse...)