Your inbox is always full.

Are you freaking Kidding me !!!!
I am one that does send emails to men all the time Guess what I even send them to women...

I am not nor have I ever been a prostitute.!!!!!


I have always been that if I see something someone posts something I like I send an email..

If I see a profile that is wonderfully written I send an email..

I guess each to their own

there are several things that are against the men and this is one of them
***NOT ALL WOMEN FIT INTO THE FOLLOWING***
old fashioned women were taught to wait to be courted by a man, because if they were flirty, they were shamed by society

then there are middle aged women who have been through one or more bad relationship(s), have several problems in their life, and have a chip on their shoulder. now they have expectations that no man can ever live up to

the young women are so carefree they engage in relationships with both genders and grew up in an instant gratification world that owes them
***thank you for not taking any offense to that***
you would think that on a dating site that people of both genders would be more willing to put aside whatever keeps them from meeting someone locally and be more willing to have a conversation. i guess all the horror stories of catfish and predators keep people from taking a risk. thing is, there are ways to minimize the risks

too bad we can't see more matchmaking threads instead of the men vs women threads that keep popping up(not to say this thread was meant to be a men vs women thread)

Thank God for that Sweetheart.

I once sent a message first to a man. He lives up where I was going on vacation so I messaged ahead and asked him where to go for pizza up there and he answered

and i did not go for pizza there it was pretty grimy

great now we have to send letters to?,..
i have got many first msg from woman,,and very happy for the last one,,

me too babe

can you do for me that...lol

Your matchmaking thread was awesome!

Wow, variety is the spice of life. I've sent a few first messages, usually when I'm checking someone out from what they've posted in the forums. I like to say hi, just passing through, checking you out - it seems more polite than just looking and not saying anything - although sometimes I do that too if there is nothing in the profile. And some respond and some don't. Meh. I don't see it as something to get uptight about. Someone lovely will turn up I hope sooner or later and I don't think who messages who first will matter in the long run.

Things happen or not, when they do or how often can't be quantified since we all have our own paths to tread and can only guess at another's. There are very different kinds of people, on this site and elsewhere, man or woman, and each have different reasons for doing what, when and how often ;)

sorry that answer was a little vague for me

not quite sure you covered all the bases

care to uh...narrow that in a little ?

lol... The subject of the post is pretty vague as well. I don't know if women or men do send messages first and about what. I'm new here, so I haven't sent or received anything, lol

Good man got a sense of humor
gonna need that in here
welcome to forums

I have the feeling I'm going to need more than a sense of humor in here, judging by this thread alone.
Thanks for the welcome, TMommy

Love is like baseball, You can get some strikes, you only need one hit. You don'��t need 50 women to message you if you'��re looking for a long-term relationship, as you say you are. You just need one good one.
Make your online dating profile stand out and radiates confidence.
Most people want to find someone who can make them laugh, so show people you have a sense of humor. If you can make someone laugh, it'��s a great icebreaker and could get your conversation off to a great start.
Good luck in your search!

:-) I'm not afraid to. I have to feel attracted to the person, before sending a message to them.

I have done online dating off and on for maybe 35 years. My experience is if you are discreet and make a first contact any more than of a friendly gesture than a "flirt" you have a lot more chance of the guy following back and pursuing than if you lay all your cards on the table and say you are interested in actually dating them. The direct approach has less than a three percent success rate.

I am not sure if it is a cultural taboo or just something that guys label as desperate or suspect. I think the extensive number of first contacts by women being "commercially " based still paints women in general in a negative light. (Some sites being worse than others.)

I do believe MANY men on line are not looking for "Bimbos" or being Catfished and I think are going to take a step back maybe hang onto that little reservation in the back of their mind so they look for a fatal flaw if women are too direct. Especially if they have already been ripped off a couple times.

I do think men like being encourage, reassured, and especially Thanked when they do say/do something "right" and as long as it is not too phony sounding is going to up your "dateable" score. It certainly is a great ice breaker for me.

I think it goes back to the natural order of things where women put themselves in the path to be pursued but don't jump their desired "catch" before he is allowed to decide he wants to chase or enjoys the chase. And I would stake my life on that men do enjoy the chase; especially when women play nice. .

TOPIC: Why Are Women Afraid to Send the First Letter?

What are you talking about? Almost every woman on here initiates contact with me by sending me TWO letters!

Of course they are usually "F" and "U".