Topic: Why doesn’t love keep us together?
oldhippie1952's photo
Mon 03/11/13 01:44 PM





I certainly think that’s a big reason.

Another reason under the same general heading of Options, would be that more women are educated than have been in the past. With education comes broader thinking and continued growth throughout life. The more two people, in a couple, grow as individuals the more likely it becomes that they will grow in different directions....or “grow apart”.



I disagree, I look at it as an opportunity to grow closer (appreciate what you've got).


I like you're thinking, but I don't think that happens very often. flowerforyou


Probably why I'll never have a great marriage, if no woman wants to work as a team.


do you find most women to be selfish then, hippie... that we cause the break ups because we don't want to work together as a team?


No, I'm saying if women use education to come apart rather than grow together I don't have a chance. Because I would want my wife to be all she could be.

1Cynderella's photo
Mon 03/11/13 01:44 PM


I certainly think that’s a big reason.

Another reason under the same general heading of Options, would be that more women are educated than have been in the past. With education comes broader thinking and continued growth throughout life. The more two people, in a couple, grow as individuals the more likely it becomes that they will grow in different directions....or “grow apart”.


You're absolutely right about the continuing growth, or lack of, becoming an obstacle... do you think maybe all the college graduates in these modern times that have huge education debts to pay off but aren't able to get the jobs they need causes problems too?


No doubt...debt can be a major issue in a marriage. I think it's the biggest of the issues that are brought into a union(but probably second to crabs). When one person's financial issues become "our" financial issues, and those issues hamper the forward momentum of the household, there are bound to be resentments.

Financial issues that a couple occur together are huge issues too, especially if they don’t agree with monetary policy. But, even those debts are not as shredding on a relationship as when...my debt + your debt = our debt.

That’s a bit of a particular with me. Since I don’t believe in debt and have worked hard my whole life to stay debt free, I would have trouble being with someone who has spent years building a long string of maxed out credit accounts. It’s not even about the debt...but the fact that this person and I will argue over the principal of financial habits.

no photo
Mon 03/11/13 01:46 PM

Why doesn’t love keep us together?


As the saying goes...
"Too many Chiefs and not enough Indians"
lol

I think whether it is the man or the woman
Someone has to hold the reins in a relationship
Though all decisions should be mutually discussed and agreed upon
If they effect both persons lives
Such as who is best at the budget,bills and expenses,etc
It does need to be give and take in order to share happiness

JMHO...

KiK

(married for 25+ years and still best friends}
Though we are divorced now
happy


I like how you said it, Kik.. it needs to be give and take in order to share "happiness"... and if truth be told... I think that if couples are happy with each other, the love never dies... imho

1Cynderella's photo
Mon 03/11/13 01:47 PM






I certainly think that’s a big reason.

Another reason under the same general heading of Options, would be that more women are educated than have been in the past. With education comes broader thinking and continued growth throughout life. The more two people, in a couple, grow as individuals the more likely it becomes that they will grow in different directions....or “grow apart”.



I disagree, I look at it as an opportunity to grow closer (appreciate what you've got).


I like you're thinking, but I don't think that happens very often. flowerforyou


Probably why I'll never have a great marriage, if no woman wants to work as a team.


do you find most women to be selfish then, hippie... that we cause the break ups because we don't want to work together as a team?


No, I'm saying if women use education to come apart rather than grow together I don't have a chance. Because I would want my wife to be all she could be.


Actually this works for you, because they say that we hit intellectual maturity in our 30's, which means that all the 30 someting divorced women available to you have basically reached their intellectual peek now. flowerforyou Perfect timing. :wink:

no photo
Mon 03/11/13 01:49 PM



People don,t take the time or effort to put what it requires to make it work.
Too many people have the ability of disposing of everything way to easily including friends, family and spouses. SAD isn,t it?


I've never considered the idea of easily disposing of people... After the 18th year of my marriage I just couldn't keep contending with all his outside influences... yes, it was very sad...

Oh 18 years is not what I meant. I mean one little thing goes wrong and they leave. I have seen it happen too many times.
People have become way to selfish to work things out.
Others like yourself, have put a lot of effort to no avail.


and that's the sad part.. all the effort that failed to bring about lasting results... we're much better friends now though.. bigsmile

oldhippie1952's photo
Mon 03/11/13 01:50 PM







I certainly think that’s a big reason.

Another reason under the same general heading of Options, would be that more women are educated than have been in the past. With education comes broader thinking and continued growth throughout life. The more two people, in a couple, grow as individuals the more likely it becomes that they will grow in different directions....or “grow apart”.



I disagree, I look at it as an opportunity to grow closer (appreciate what you've got).


I like you're thinking, but I don't think that happens very often. flowerforyou


Probably why I'll never have a great marriage, if no woman wants to work as a team.


do you find most women to be selfish then, hippie... that we cause the break ups because we don't want to work together as a team?


No, I'm saying if women use education to come apart rather than grow together I don't have a chance. Because I would want my wife to be all she could be.


Actually this works for you, because they say that we hit intellectual maturity in our 30's, which means that all the 30 someting divorced women available to you have basically reached their intellectual peek now. flowerforyou Perfect timing. :wink:



I don't know if I could get interested in a young woman.

no photo
Mon 03/11/13 01:53 PM




I certainly think that’s a big reason.

Another reason under the same general heading of Options, would be that more women are educated than have been in the past. With education comes broader thinking and continued growth throughout life. The more two people, in a couple, grow as individuals the more likely it becomes that they will grow in different directions....or “grow apart”.



I disagree, I look at it as an opportunity to grow closer (appreciate what you've got).


I like you're thinking, but I don't think that happens very often. flowerforyou


Its true dat ppl grow apart as time passes a person mature. Wat we think a big issue now is like a small problem in future wen v look back at it. Hence it is important that even though u grow apart u can always find something else in your partners dat can make u fall in love wid dem all over again. And smebody else said "making it work" is d most important factor dat binds any relationship.


falling in love with the same person twice? after we've seen all their worst attributes that destroyed the love the first time? do you really think it's possible?

no photo
Mon 03/11/13 01:56 PM






I certainly think that’s a big reason.

Another reason under the same general heading of Options, would be that more women are educated than have been in the past. With education comes broader thinking and continued growth throughout life. The more two people, in a couple, grow as individuals the more likely it becomes that they will grow in different directions....or “grow apart”.



I disagree, I look at it as an opportunity to grow closer (appreciate what you've got).


I like you're thinking, but I don't think that happens very often. flowerforyou


Probably why I'll never have a great marriage, if no woman wants to work as a team.


do you find most women to be selfish then, hippie... that we cause the break ups because we don't want to work together as a team?


No, I'm saying if women use education to come apart rather than grow together I don't have a chance. Because I would want my wife to be all she could be.


That makes sense... and women are lucky when they have a man that encourages their growth rather than stunting it.. :thumbsup:

no photo
Mon 03/11/13 01:59 PM



I certainly think that’s a big reason.

Another reason under the same general heading of Options, would be that more women are educated than have been in the past. With education comes broader thinking and continued growth throughout life. The more two people, in a couple, grow as individuals the more likely it becomes that they will grow in different directions....or “grow apart”.


You're absolutely right about the continuing growth, or lack of, becoming an obstacle... do you think maybe all the college graduates in these modern times that have huge education debts to pay off but aren't able to get the jobs they need causes problems too?


No doubt...debt can be a major issue in a marriage. I think it's the biggest of the issues that are brought into a union(but probably second to crabs). When one person's financial issues become "our" financial issues, and those issues hamper the forward momentum of the household, there are bound to be resentments.

Financial issues that a couple occur together are huge issues too, especially if they don’t agree with monetary policy. But, even those debts are not as shredding on a relationship as when...my debt + your debt = our debt.

That’s a bit of a particular with me. Since I don’t believe in debt and have worked hard my whole life to stay debt free, I would have trouble being with someone who has spent years building a long string of maxed out credit accounts. It’s not even about the debt...but the fact that this person and I will argue over the principal of financial habits.



Yes, I agree about the "my and your" debt issues too.. But, I'm lost on "crabs"... what's that?

Toodygirl5's photo
Mon 03/11/13 02:01 PM

That’s a bit of a particular with me. Since I don’t believe in debt and have worked hard my whole life to stay debt free, I would have trouble being with someone who has spent years building a long string of maxed out credit accounts. It’s not even about the debt...but the fact that this person and I will argue over the principal of financial habits.



I Agree..I met too many Older men online who had huge debt from their ex wives and other relationships. I am not trying to get into a huge MESS like that.

no photo
Mon 03/11/13 02:02 PM


That’s a bit of a particular with me. Since I don’t believe in debt and have worked hard my whole life to stay debt free, I would have trouble being with someone who has spent years building a long string of maxed out credit accounts. It’s not even about the debt...but the fact that this person and I will argue over the principal of financial habits.



I Agree..I met too many Older men online who had huge debt from their ex wives and other relationships. I am not trying to get into a huge MESS like that.


:thumbsup: flowerforyou

1Cynderella's photo
Mon 03/11/13 02:16 PM




I certainly think that’s a big reason.

Another reason under the same general heading of Options, would be that more women are educated than have been in the past. With education comes broader thinking and continued growth throughout life. The more two people, in a couple, grow as individuals the more likely it becomes that they will grow in different directions....or “grow apart”.


You're absolutely right about the continuing growth, or lack of, becoming an obstacle... do you think maybe all the college graduates in these modern times that have huge education debts to pay off but aren't able to get the jobs they need causes problems too?


No doubt...debt can be a major issue in a marriage. I think it's the biggest of the issues that are brought into a union(but probably second to crabs). When one person's financial issues become "our" financial issues, and those issues hamper the forward momentum of the household, there are bound to be resentments.

Financial issues that a couple occur together are huge issues too, especially if they don’t agree with monetary policy. But, even those debts are not as shredding on a relationship as when...my debt + your debt = our debt.

That’s a bit of a particular with me. Since I don’t believe in debt and have worked hard my whole life to stay debt free, I would have trouble being with someone who has spent years building a long string of maxed out credit accounts. It’s not even about the debt...but the fact that this person and I will argue over the principal of financial habits.



Yes, I agree about the "my and your" debt issues too.. But, I'm lost on "crabs"... what's that?


I'm not 100% sure myself, but it's a really bad kind of Venereal Disease! I don't want someone bringing THAT into a relationship either! noway

no photo
Mon 03/11/13 02:35 PM





I certainly think that’s a big reason.

Another reason under the same general heading of Options, would be that more women are educated than have been in the past. With education comes broader thinking and continued growth throughout life. The more two people, in a couple, grow as individuals the more likely it becomes that they will grow in different directions....or “grow apart”.


You're absolutely right about the continuing growth, or lack of, becoming an obstacle... do you think maybe all the college graduates in these modern times that have huge education debts to pay off but aren't able to get the jobs they need causes problems too?


No doubt...debt can be a major issue in a marriage. I think it's the biggest of the issues that are brought into a union(but probably second to crabs). When one person's financial issues become "our" financial issues, and those issues hamper the forward momentum of the household, there are bound to be resentments.

Financial issues that a couple occur together are huge issues too, especially if they don’t agree with monetary policy. But, even those debts are not as shredding on a relationship as when...my debt + your debt = our debt.

That’s a bit of a particular with me. Since I don’t believe in debt and have worked hard my whole life to stay debt free, I would have trouble being with someone who has spent years building a long string of maxed out credit accounts. It’s not even about the debt...but the fact that this person and I will argue over the principal of financial habits.



Yes, I agree about the "my and your" debt issues too.. But, I'm lost on "crabs"... what's that?


I'm not 100% sure myself, but it's a really bad kind of Venereal Disease! I don't want someone bringing THAT into a relationship either! noway


Wow! No kidding... me either... :thumbsup:

oldhippie1952's photo
Mon 03/11/13 03:38 PM



Yes, I agree about the "my and your" debt issues too.. But, I'm lost on "crabs"... what's that?



Human based "fleas" in the pubic region....

1Cynderella's photo
Mon 03/11/13 03:45 PM




Yes, I agree about the "my and your" debt issues too.. But, I'm lost on "crabs"... what's that?



Human based "fleas" in the pubic region....


Really? Someone once told me they were living bugs, and I didn't believe them. That's disgusting! sick

oldhippie1952's photo
Mon 03/11/13 03:48 PM





Yes, I agree about the "my and your" debt issues too.. But, I'm lost on "crabs"... what's that?



Human based "fleas" in the pubic region....


Really? Someone once told me they were living bugs, and I didn't believe them. That's disgusting! sick



They are like head lice... a mild venereal disease.

no photo
Mon 03/11/13 03:58 PM




Yes, I agree about the "my and your" debt issues too.. But, I'm lost on "crabs"... what's that?



Human based "fleas" in the pubic region....


how gross... surprised

no photo
Mon 03/11/13 04:00 PM





Yes, I agree about the "my and your" debt issues too.. But, I'm lost on "crabs"... what's that?



Human based "fleas" in the pubic region....


Really? Someone once told me they were living bugs, and I didn't believe them. That's disgusting! sick


When you first said it I thought you were referring to all of us Cancers... laugh

minemine2013's photo
Mon 03/11/13 04:44 PM
Athen I have to be honest with you we should go back to old fashion marriage. The man is the head of the family he should provide,protect, and control his family. The woman is the help mate she must submit to the man and support him. The man must love and respect his wife so that the woman will always obey him. Whether the woman is working or she is very rich she must submit and obey her husband. Men should be more hard working and responsible take of your wife still provide, love and treat her like a woman even if she is richer than you.

no photo
Mon 03/11/13 04:46 PM
I can't be so sure that money would affect dating a university student. For one, male university students, I've dated a few, and money was the last thing that could ever come between us. We liked each other, and that was all that mattered. It was always a younger guy. They were quite caring. I can see why their parents were proud of them. In todays working world, it's hard to know whether it's even worth studying for any diploma or bachelor degree anymore. As almost every job is being cut by the government, so who is gonna find worth in earning any sort of degree, when in the end, they may turn you away anyway, because the government made them do that. I can see why teens think education is hardly a step on the employment ladder these days. Education, why did I ever bother? lol ;)