I actually dont think arranged marriages are automatically messed up

I think many more relationships might last if people close to us picked partners based on what they know about us,, instead of us picking partners so often based on the 'impression' we have of them initially,,,

it all boils down to does the girl want to get it on and if she does she wont let people tell her she is a slut or anything

Well, this post is way out in the blue off topic. But,since it's directed at me I'll address it.

I think everything you said is true, but it's not it's not the complete picture. It's only what you've gleaned from these forums. I also have a fun, silly light hearted side that seldom comes out here.

I have no idea why any woman would want to go out with me. But, I never have trouble finding a date. So, I must have something going for me. But, this is no different than women.

Really, what does a woman have to offer a man that will make his life better other than sex? There was a time when a woman would wash a man's clothes, cook his food, clean his house and shine his shoes. But those days are over. Now he comes home to a dark house every night and cooks his own food. How is this any different than him being single?

I was married to a stay at home wife that still didn't clean the house! And if I asked about dinner she'd say "What am I? Your slave?" And she'd complain that I didn't help her out enough. When I lived alone, my house was clean. She thought I should make the living AND clean up after her.

Isn't it more honest to just be single and get together for sex when it's convenient for both?

I do have some roots. I still call the town I was born in home. My father still lives there and I see him every time I'm in town. My mother passed away a couple of years ago. She and my father were married for 60 years. Also my sons live there and I see them both at every opportunity.

I've never paid for sex and I'm a little insulted at the implication. I'm sure an insult was how you meant it, so give yourself a pat on the back. The greatest pleasure I derive from sex is pleasing my partner. Hookers are for the pleasure of the of the purchaser. So, me paying for sex would defeat the purpose of me having sex at all.

I don't like compromise. Compromising means neither partner is getting what they actually want. Compromise is a sad replacement for happiness in a relationship. The more compromising you have to do, the more likely it is you're with the wrong person.

Whether you care to admit it or not, there are women out there that abuse men. They take advantage of men by faining interest and trick these men into buying them gifts and dinners and paying their bills without ever having sex with them. I fell for it in my youth, but not anymore. I see women as equals in every way now. I wouldn't pay a man's rent for him, so why would I pay a woman's?

It's alright for a woman to insist on taking her time before investing sex in a relationship. That's just her protecting herself. But, if a man tries to protect himself from the attempts of a woman to get her hands on his assets or calls her out on her head games, he's a pig, a misogynist, a sexist or worse.

I guess I'm like a woman that's been tricked by a few "players." These women see players everywhere. I've been tricked by women, so now I see female trickery everywhere. Yes, I'm cynical.

Lastly, I don't want to kick her out. I want her to be independent. To have her own place and pay her own bills. I wouldn't expect her to support me and I won't support her. I've saved my money for my retirement and my sons. She can save hers or not. It's up to her and I don't care.

And the comment about the android was a joke.

Am sorry to budge in like this but to be honest ladies and gents...aftr everything is said and done...personally i think sex is juss overated...up to an extent where most ladies are using it against men...for they know how much we love it...so wether a lady decides to give it up on the frst ,second ,or third day...doesnt really make a difference at the end of it all we'll end up having it.So if it feels ryt at the time...lets do it.

I don't get sexually involved with people I don't like. Personal choice I guess. I'm not saying 'love'. But if you share your body, you hope it's someone you can later share coffee with. And for the record I (and I think many women) don't have a predetermined timeline. But as far as meeting someone in a bar and going home with them . . . nope. As to an actual date, there are some people that you have an immediate connection to and some you don't. And some just make you wonder if they're playing a game.

This question cracks me up!!
If a Man is interested, he will keep seeing a woman if she has sex with him or not on the 1st date.
Women on the other hand may like him and wish to see him again so we DO NOT have sex on the 1st date!

Men can have sex with anyone with a VJayjay and not blink an eye...
with those odds against us, We can't have sex on the 1st date with a guy we REALLY like!

And for the record... Women love sex JUST AS MUCH, when done properly!
It's just that men try to have the sex first , foremost, and only... If that's all I wanted, I'd rather be on the street making money from it!
Why give it for free and not even get the relationship?!!

I noticed there was one point I missed addressing in my last post.

I put a great deal of thought and effort into planning a date. I want her to feel comfortable, but I also want to set things up so that we have lots of opportunity to get to know one another. I plan at least four stops. The first one might be coffee. The second could be an art gallery or museum. The third is likely a meal. And the forth will be drinks. This usually takes about 10 to 12 hours. So, one date with me is like 3 or more with another man.

Throughout the time we spend together I'm paying close attention to her comfort level. Yes, I'm climbing the ladder to sex. But, I'm also paying attention to how she's reacting to me. Give and take, push and pull. It's like a dance. I'm leading, but I never force her to follow. She follows because she's enjoying herself.

At the end of the night I always have a reason for her to come back to my place other than just sex. Then sex can "just happen."

So, I'm not just hooking up with strangers. I'm investing as much time as she feels she needs. And I'm planning everything to cost as little as possible. I think this is an awesome date because it's not about a movie, it's about the two of us getting to know each other.

But, if you like him and want to see him again and want to have sex why are you putting it off? Why can't you have sex on a first date? What are you getting by waiting that you won't get in you don't wait?

Okay, so what do you gain from a relationship other than sex?

Wow, I had no idea that so many women really like me

Are you serious? You would rather go on the game than sleep with someone that hasn't made some big commitment to you?

To answer your question, a lot of people don't want a serious rrelationship or just want to keep it fairly casual until they have decided whether or not they really want to be with somebody and perhaps spend the rest of their life with them.

Let me ask you a question: Why should I jump into a relationship before I even know what she's like in bed ? I am not saying that I try to sleep with every woman that I go out with on the first date because I don't and if I am in a sexual relationship with someone it is a relationship but I think I have more respect for independant women that have sex because they want to have sex than I do for people that are asking what else there's going to be in it for them, particularly if it comes down to money. That doesn't mean that I'm not happy to take a girlfriend to nice places and all the rest of it but once they start using it as a weapon or a bargaining counter...

I'm not giving him the time of his life if he's not feeling me like that! My sex and the relationship is hand in hand. That's why

I'm not saying wait for a ring! I agree... I want to test him out too! But there has to be some spark of " this could go somewhere" other than the bedroom

Sex is the bonus! The cherry on top ( pardon this pun) of an already nice situation! A good guy I can hang out with and talk with.

I probably won't jump into bed on the first date (but there are no rules and no judgment about that.) HOWEVER, I sure do evaluate the potential on a first date. Is there chemistry? Sometimes I can't even imagine kissing a man, let alone sleeping with him...and there's no second date. That's the "usual" progression and if I wouldn't be willing to go there EVER then it's not fair to either party.

Hmm, so you would base a chance of any type of relationship strictly on sex? Wow, I only thought teenagers thought that way. How can you base one night sex on how good a person is sexually? You have no way of knowing each other's bodies; what is stimulating, what turns you off, etc. You have just met each other and don't know squat, so there is a good chance the sex will not be that good. Also; you don't know that person and its dangerous to hop in bed with a complete stranger as you don't know their background or if they have a criminal background.

Yes I am,That is your right to dissage I would never stand in judgement of a woman who has sex on the frist date everyone has the right to live there life as they want,but what about STIS, unwanted preganciegs?Postistios sorry cant spell get paid,& i have more respect for them than people not just women who sleep around,but i want not just sex!Not standing in judgement just the way i feel

With you there I feel the same,guessit,s what you want out of life