Even though YOU are done with her, she could cause major problems with your new girlfriend. I truly believe that you should finish any past relationships before you try to start a new one!! Get the divorce done and then you won't have any problems!! If you are dating someone and your wife comes around..then you could say this is my ex wife instead of my wife!!
I guess you have to ask yourself, would you want to date someone who is still married?? I mean lets be honest, sometimes women can be psycho about getting a divorced..esp IF they are not the ones who wanted it!! Do yourself and whoever you date a favor...just file for divorce and get it done!!!
Good Luck

Aside from what I had posted late last week I also agree
with Justme659. I am currently separated n it doesn't have
to b lonely. Focus on U get out there n do new things meet
new people. I mean that's what this site is for, it doesn't
mean u have to search for something romantic but if that's
what u want n need then u go for it! :)

although divorce is an emotional thing...more than anything it comes down to a business deal...get the paper and deal with the baggage first...i dont thinks its fair to bring someone in right away...in my experience it just dont work out...ive been divorced for almost 5 years...still single ~woot~ lol

Agree.

From my view, it is not just the fear of reconcilliation, it is also the fact that you are tied to another woman, there are many things that woman look at, like how long have you been seperated? months years, if it has been too long I would worry about your commitment to a new relationship, why havent you gotten the divorce? what kind of connection do you still have with your wife?
Any way there are a lot of things to think about, I hope this helps!

exactly!!!!!!!
when i had met the old bf it wasent a romantic thing at first for we had been friends at least a few months before we even started dating and dumb me i let him move in with me . he was lazy only freaken job he had was working at the fair every summer.. that didnt pay the bills..i ended up working 3 side jobs, 2 outside the home and one on the computer.. yea i kicked him to the curbs, and approx 6months later he got married to some girl he had been talking to on the net for a yr
and get this. he has email me in facebook a few times asking if i wanted to play around.....DONT THINK SO!!!!!!!!

just something to think about...just because you have divorce papers, doesn't mean the ex won't try to make your life hell or try to ruin future relationships. Hell that doesn't even require marriage for that to happen.

i didnt have to worry about my ex hubby trying to make my life hell or try to ruin any of my relationships.. he ruined his own by cheating, i have no clu why he still with his 2nd wife.. love is so freaken blind.. it took me 2yrs and they have been together about 20yrs something like that and she still hasent seen through him

Never been married....

Well my opinion is you should take time for yourself before dating again. It just shows that you are needy. You need time to find your identity again. So much of who we are has to do with who we were with. Rebounds never last. We don't want to admit it...but some of us just don't like to be alone...so we jump right back into the fire again. When you stop thinking about your ex then its time to mingle.

I think you should get over the bitterness

before you even start looking for someone new!

I see a lot of cynicism on this thread. While cynicism is good, it is sad that most of the people expressing the cynicism probably have not properly applied it to their lives.

After all, how many of ya'll who say dating a separated person is a bad idea have an invisible sky daddy and believe a cosmic jewish zombie who was his own father hung himself from a tree to save you because a snake told a rib-woman to eat a fruit from a magical tree? That makes no sense at all, but it's amazing how many people actually believe it.

Here's how you make this work. You start talking to the person who's separated. You get to know who they are, get to know them as a person. If they make you happy enough, then you might consider taking the chance and jump off the deep end. If they don't make you happy enough to overcome your insecurities, then don't bother jumping off the deep end.

The simple fact of the matter is you won't know unless you try. You won't know if he's working on his divorce, and will get it, that it's just a matter of time, unless you actually go for it.

I understand you've probably been hurt before. I know I certainly have.

Maybe I'm stupid or something. But at least I don't hold any fairy tales near and dear. :)

I'm still angry at my ex from nine years ago.

There's a song by a band called Combichrist that describes that ex perfectly. It's called "Lying Sack of S***." You ought to listen to it sometime.

I can never forgive my ex for what they did. It seriously was an ultimate sin.

You know that cosmic jewish zombie can help you with that bitterness.

Seriously?? WTF?? If your really done with her be a man and step up and get the divorce!! (Thought that would be pretty obvious!!) If your not willing to take that final step and are content with being separated only it shows you still have some sort of reason for that decision. Deep down do you still have feelings for her? Get some closure both for yourself and your future happiness.....until you do you will not move forward....Being a woman I can say most women don't want or wont hook up with a guy who still is legally tied to the ex.....cuz it shows you still obviously have more than legal ties to her....

Seriously?? WTF?? If your really done with her be a man and step up and get the divorce!! (Thought that would be pretty obvious!!) If your not willing to take that final step and are content with being separated only it shows you still have some sort of reason for that decision. Deep down do you still have feelings for her? Get some closure both for yourself and your future happiness.....until you do you will not move forward....Being a woman I can say most women don't want or wont hook up with a guy who still is legally tied to the ex.....cuz it shows you still obviously have more than legal ties to her....

Sorry...get divorced first. Too many women have been burned before, so "just do it!"

When someone stays attached to someone is for a reason, i believe one must be mentally cleared that is it, and that there is no going back,but until then is when the big decision needs to be made. the paper work is not hard, what is hard is to make the decision. it took me 5 yrs to finally obtain the courage to do it, once the feelings are out, the decision is easier and less painful.

first of all you need help, one time at mass the priest said that we waste our valuable time thinking on what is painful, and what makes us cry. instead of forgiving and moving on we scare ourself for life with memories that have no meaning, life is short you need to move on and find peace within yourself, in order to be completely happy

you look handsome are you still single