31 single tring to get in the dating scene, really hard,and have no clue, wish it was easy

yep, I'm 49 getting back out there..rules have changed, I have no clue. I'm thinking I'm doing it wrong...

I think Iam too!

It would seem that I have been doing it wrong the whole damn time....lol

yep me too... a year ago I thought I'd get back out there and I've gotten stood up 3 times, that's it. The common denominator all 3 times is me...so I must be doing it wrong!

So I guess I should feel priveleged. I'm not doing it wrong.

Of course, I'm not doing it right either.

Hell, I'm not doing it at all and haven't in years. I don't think I remember how it works although I'm pretty sure it involves being asked to go out with somebody, somewhere, to do something. I didn't even know there was a wrong way to do it! Now I'm even more nervous about this possible but improbable future endeavor.

45 and must also be doing it wrong

Yep you r all right just got divorced and as nervous as hell about my future and what it holds,silly yes i know but thats me and yet 15 yrs ago i would of thought nothing of it and just took it as a challenge,but now i have got to get a place to live as i moved back to my parents etc.. doing my head in but with out them i would have been on the streets so glad of them really.
Ok then this dating on the web canot get it right i see a girl i like send her a mail tell her how nice it would be to chat and all that and they don't reply so i have i have given up with paying for memberships now i think i will just stick to forms like this one.
Look sorry to waffle on but i felt like getting it unloaded pleas reply if you see fit or take the pea,hey i ain't going to know if you don't say

51 and I am doing it right!!!

I am 37 and just dating again after a short marriage and a LONG divorce. I only seem to run into men who are looking to be "taken care of" financially and it's starting to get me down. . Where are the MEN living these days?

I don't think it's about "doing it wrong", I think we've all changed after marriage and then the divorce.. We pretty much know what we want and are certain of what we don't want.. We're a little pickier now that we've been through things... It takes time to meet a person that we mesh with...

I think learning to love living with yourself comes before loving and/or living with someone else. Dating can be a real downer if you look at is as "oh it has to be me doing something wrong"..

Probably the only thing being done wrong is picking the wrong type of person or picking a person that isn't upfront and honest and really how can one foresee that?

Don't be so tough on yourselves.. Look at it as making friends and enjoying new experiences in life... When it's time it will happen, that's much better than a bunch of oopses or broken hearts...

yeah, Im 40 but Im enjoying loving and pampering myself and my kids. Its a big adjustment when you get used to having that SOMEONE else whose happiness you concern yourself with and whom you look to to reinforce your own happiness.

I am interested in having that ONE, someday. But I know my age and my independence will be a pretty big challenge, coupled with my attitude that a partner is something I dream about(like the lotto) but not something Im despearate enough to settle about. Right now, I would love to make even one FANTASTIC friend, but it is tough, because adults have become so accustomed to jumping right into dating.

I would suggest going to dating website, make a profile without a picture, make one post in the forums and leave, never to be heard from again.

yes its a shame everyone is so set on finding a beautiful woman OR man, yes u ladies do it too, that everything that really matters gets tossed. I tried to meet someone on several sites without using a pic but couldnt even get a hello. Forget the pics and just respond to people that u have common likes and interests for a while then check out the pics, wonder what would happen?

You'd probably meet a lot of great people that you have tons in common with and have aboslutely no physical attraction to.

There has to be some attraction, otherwise you're just going to be friends.

this is the thing that scares me the dating after so long
ahhhhhhhhh when i 20 i had no problem with it but now i worry that i wont meet anyone else

Me 3!!

Depends on your definition of 'some'... I personally put looks at around 20% and substance (what's in their heart) at around 80%.... too many people have it just reversed...