What do you think?
xxx

as for horror film best lines my favourite has to be "My name...My name...My name....My name is Alice. And I remember EVERYTHING!" lol

Just got a message from a guy in India proclaiming his love for me...I(we've never even chatted, he's just seen my profile which admittedly is mostly in Portuguese - really need to change that), a few from guys who are \God fearing/ Christians looking for good Christian wives (I really should put 'Anti-Christ Incarnate' as my description, and a few from guys who've told me that I'm so beautiful, I look like an angel, and they can't believe that I'm on this site looking for a partner, etc", real fingers down the back of the throat stuff! Pleeeeeeeeeeeeeeeease! If I had a pet rabbit I'd be hiding it by now! LOL.

Oh right, just looked at your profile. You are genuinely an arsehole!

Is that meant to be a joke or are you genuinely an arse hole?

Well, no, afterwards he didn't actually....

Are bi curious-es allowed? LOL
xxx

Oh god! I watched it for about 5 minutes and then switched it off in digust! Horrible, horrible, horrible film!!!

originally heard this as a GWB joke.

A nun is taking a bath when there's a knock at the door.
"Who is it?!" She asks.
"It's the blind man," cames the reply.
The nun shrugs and thinks what the hell and tells him to come in.
"Nice ****", says the man. "Now where do you want these blinds?"

A woman is driving along a country road when she accidently hits a rabbit. She immediately pulls over and gets out of the car, distraught.
A man is kind enough to see her distress and stops behind her. She explains what has happened and points to the twitching rabbit lying on the side of the road.
The man goes to the boot of his car and pulls out an aerosol can and sprays the rabbit liberally with it. To the woman's amazement, the animal springs to it's feet and bounds off into the hedge. Feeling much better, the woman continues her journey but is slightly surprised as she sees the rabbit running along side her car waving its paw at her. After two or three miles she stops again. The kindly man again stops behind her. The woman explains what she's seen and asks him what he used to revive the animal...
"Oh, that." he replies, showing her the can. "It's hare restorer with permanent wave..."

A rabbit walks into a corner shop and thumps the counter several times.
THUMP! THUMP! THUMP!
An irate shopkeeper emerges.
"A half a pound of carrots, please." says the rabbit.
The shopkeeper fetches the carrots but asks the rabbit not to thump the counter as it's annoying. The rabbit apologises profusely.
The next day, the rabbit goes back into the shop.
THUMP! THUMP! THUMP! " half a pound of carrots please."
The shopkeeper glares at him. "Fine, I'll serve you the carrots but I've asked you before not to bang the counter like that. It's really annoying!" Again the rabbit apologises profusely.
Day three and the rabbit returns to the shop.
THUMP!THUMP!THUMP!
The shopkeeper is at the end of his tether at this point and grabs the rabbit by the throat. "Look, I've told you before NOT TO BANG THE COUNTER!!! The next time you do that I'm going to nail your paws to the counter with six inch nails!"
Day four, the rabbit walks meekly into the shop and asks for a bag of six inch nails. The shop keeper looks confused.
"We haven't got any six inch nails,"......

THUMP! THUMP! THUMP! "A half a pound of carrots please..."

(Sorry, this might be slightly racist.)

Two rednecks friends go hunting together. One accidently shoots his friend and rushes him to the nearest hospital. He waits anxiously pacing the corridor to speak to the doctor. Eventually the doctor emerges and the friend asks him how his friend is doing.
"Well, I can't lie to you sir. It's touch and go. It might have been better if you hadn't gutted him first....."

Not Whitney but Diana from frankie boyle ( a scottish comedian who has been in hot water with the bbc more than once)

"I was really surprised that the Royal family decided to hold a Memorial for Diana in the form of a Pop Concert. I mean Diana wasn't really associatedc with the pop world. If they really wanted to give us to remember her by I think they should have gone with something that celebrated her the way she lived her life...a gang bang in a minefield maybe? LOL

(Okay, it's probably very unpatriotic of me to post this as not only am I British I'm Welsh!!!) But still find it hysterically funny!!!
LOL

A husband and wife had a raging argument one night before going to bed. Not wanting to be the first one tgo break down the Husband leaves his wife a note. "I'm going fishing tomorrow with the guys. Wake me up at 6 am." He promptly and smugly goes to sleep. The next morning he wakes up. It's 11am and there's no sign of his wife. There is however a note on her pillow saying "It's 6am. Get up!"
lol
xxx

ble mae dy got di? 'Dy ti wedi tyni
Where's your coat - you've pulled! LOL

well, if it means I get to play alongside Carlos Oliveira (who's actually a Middle Eastern actor) that's a double yes from me!! LOL

That's odd, a double ss has been blacked out, didnt think it was that offensive. what about the British version a-r-s-e-? what do others think?

Anyother ladies want to be Alice and really kick ***?
LOL x