Either way, I wish everyone the best of luck, health, happiness and success!

Peace & Blessings!

You're absolutely right. Some people just don't want to change, and there is nothing you can do about that.

What I'm trying to say, is that you can at lest share your knowledge with people. Especially if it could help them. Then if they can make up their own minds. If a child kept burning himself because he likes to pay with matches...wouldn't you tell the child to "stop playing with matches or your get burned?" And yes, sometimes as adults, we need to be reminded of simple examples like that.

This whole topic came about because Men claimed they couldn't find "good Women". So I shared my ideas about why this was. That's it. I may have expounded on the subject to make it broader...but that's all it is.

Someone said it best: "know yourself, look for inner qualities that compliment your own, and don't bother with the negative." I feel that this can be applied to life. We all have a choice. Some of us like to learn and grow...others are comfortable in their own misery. Some are neutral...but we are all free to make that choice.

Peace & Blessings!

Good insight!

Please speak for yourself. This is a major problem thanks to certain "Reality" TV shows. New Jersey has many good, honest, hardworking people, and to lump the "whole" of NJ into this "fictional" category of "Selfish and Shallow" people, is not fair.

I know young people may not understand this, but please learn your NJ History, have some pride. Too many people have built, slaved, and died to make the "Garden State" what it is today. Try telling our local farmers who put "food" on your table that they are all "Shallow & selfish".

In the end its all in "individual choice" to behave or not. To treat each other good or not.

Peace & Blessings!

Just a question: Isn't the guy "quick to judge" a woman just because she's wearing red lipstick? I mean, if he said that at the first meeting w/out knowing "why" she's wearing it..that sounds like "judging a book by it's cover". Some Indian cultures use make up (including red lipstick) for religious and cultural expression.

Just saying...

Peace & Blessings.

I agree! :)

There's another post putting down women from NJ. I think there's good and bad all around. I believe it's best to just know yourself and look for the qualities you like in the other person. Let the bad go their own way and wish them all the best in the process.

Peace & Blessings.

Wow! I'm sorry that you feel that way. What part of NJ are you from? I do see where your coming from though. I think Hollywood and Entertainment in general may have some influence over that. Money, Sex, Fame, Power, Beauty...those things are constantly in our faces. So it's easy to get sucked into all of that. But as one poster said “maturity & experience” helps us see through the smoke screen to what really matters in ourselves and others.

I feel that a lot of people "think" they know what type of person they are looking for. But really, the question to ask oneself is: “ Do you know what type of person is really suited for you?” And to answer that questions, you really have to “know yourself”. And then you also have to factor in the current stage of life you're in (another poster mentioned his transformation as he got older).

Sometimes we may be attracted to those people who aren't good for us, due to various reasons. Ex, would be a young lady who dates guys that beat her, because she was abused as a child. Or it could even be “subconscious” little thing like; a man who's Mother was overly strict and unwittingly taught her son “perfection” is key. So he ends up marrying a trophy wife, who doesn't love him, etc.

And I think the key factor is: “What type of energy & attitude are you putting out there?” It's so true. When this was brought to my attention, it really helped me refocus and change for the better. You literally do “attract” what you “present” to the world, whether it's intentional or subconscious. Change your “perception/attitude/mindset” and you will see a BIG difference. :)

So I've come to really learn “who” I am, and look for a partner who compliments me, stimulates me (mind, body, spirit) and most importantly; has the other qualities I “lack”, so that I'm constantly learning and growing in the relationship.

Peace & Blessings!

...then what about helping people to better understand a situation? If someone called you a "liar", and miss-understood what you were"truly" all about. Wouldn't you kindly correct them?

"True ignorance isn't a choice. But once you know the true nature of a thing, then you can choose to live in bliss"

-JLH

Hi, Thanks for your post. You've made some good points.

I would like to point out that I am not complaining. I was just saying that you can't dump a bad label on a whole gender or group of people because of a bad experience. And as you've hinted, we all have to take accountability for ourselves.

This sums up my hope for the future:

"I think everyone should get back to what really matters. Finding people you really connect with and taking the time to enjoy the "whole" experience. That includes, friendship, chemistry, learning from each other, growing as a result, and discovering the little "mysteries" that make us all (as indivual) so special and unique."

Peace & Blessings!
:)

Thanks and same to you!

Who indeed! :)

Happy New Year & Thanks for responding.

Yes! Central Jersey over here!!

Happy New Year!

Another good one...are you a comedian as well?

a Katherine Heigl movie is how they found Osama Bin Laden

there was an on going debate whether Waterboarding while interrogating prisoners was torture or not, and besides this method wasn't getting them the information they seeked,

one of the male interrogators began having flashbacks of how his girlfriend torture him so they decided to show a Katernine Helgi chick flick movie to one of the prisoners in wide screen surround sound in 3D-a-vision with a pair of stereo headphones

the prisoner after viewing the opening credits said ok look I'll tell you where Bin Laden is but first you have to promise to do two things......turn off that freaking movie and bring back waterboarding


LOL! That's a good one!

...to handle a Real Woman?
.....Are they strong enough to take responsibility??


Greeting, Peace & Blessings to you all!

I must address something that was posted on the board. I will not say where it originated out of "respect", but I feel strongly about it.

Something was written about the "lack of quality" of New Jersey Women.

It was the title of the "original" poster that was off putting. But after reading what one poster said, it wasn't as bad as I thought. But it is the "attitude" of the original poster that I have an issue with. Here's what was written, and then I will post my reply, and then comment. Please feel free to share your thoughts. My goal is to "enlighten" and learn what I lack. But I also have a responsibility to stick up for what I believe is right. Thanks, and God Bless! :)

[The women in Jersey aren’t much better]



{My reply}:

I agree for the most part, about women waiting. But I DO have a PROBLEM with the Title of the Topic. What you're talking about is, much broader. What was said can apply to both men & women throughout the US, if not the world. And to say that women in NJ are "not much better" is an insult to good, honest, hard working women like myself - who are still "single" because we ARE NOT giving it up.

I'm not hating...just voicing my concerns. And I've dated older men, who "claim" to want quality and would wait, and guess what? They couldn't handle it. Then when they get dumped by some easy piece, that they claimed to have fallen in love with, they get bitter and angry. And then all of a sudden, ALL women are lairs, cheaters, and manipulates. You guys can't have it both ways. You have to do the work, and make the effort for a solid and lasting relationship too.

And shouldn't men (when they reach a certain age of maturity) wait too? Shouldn't they have the self-esteem, and self love/self worth, to hold off on intimacy? Men never seem to want to take responsibility for their behavior. But as soon as a women does it...all hell brakes loose. I'm not saying that women should get a "stud" card and equal "player" rights too. I think everyone should get back to what really matters. Finding people you really connect with and taking the time to enjoy the "whole" experience. That includes, friendship, chemistry, learning from each other, growing as a result, and discovering the little "mysteries" that make us all (as individual) so special and unique.

Peace & Blessings!
:)

{My Comments}:

You know...the problem from day 1 has been, that men have been objectifying women. Using women as sex objects, slaves, breeders, nursemaids, etc. Now I'm not talking about the good men in general. I'm taking about the immoral and unethical ones that still do these things to this very day for profit, pleasure, or just plain insanity.

Men “claim” to want a good woman, yet secretly long, and lust for “young succulent flesh” to quote an a friend of a friend. So if men want a “good woman”, then start treating women “good” every day. Better yet, start treating “yourselves” good every day. Because that where it all begins. If you don't hold yourself in “high esteem” ( like you do your car, or other prized possession) then you will treat others the same. Think about it. If your favorite sport star, or singer, or actor, wanted to visit you for the weekend; what would you do? How would you treat that person for the next three days? Would you clean your house? Would you go shopping for the best food? ($100 on a keg of beer, get the best cut of steaks, or $300 for a bottle of wine?) Would you talk to that person any old kind of way? Wouldn't you drive yourself nuts just to make sure that weekend went perfect??

So if you want a good woman, why would you treat women in general, “any old kind of way?” Don't you know that a woman gave birth to you? Don't you know that Women keep humanity going? Yes, men help but do they bring babies to full term? Do they go through the pain of giving life? Do the incur the risk of physical injury or even DEATH to make more “Men?” If it weren't for the strength, courage, patience, kindness, determination, and skills of a woman, none of us would be here. So don't woman deserve the “highest respect” there is?

But no. Men, (again, not all men..you know who you are) you keep making & buying porno. You pay for escorts. Entertainment is based on supply and demand. Sex sells, because YOU demand it. No one can go 10 ft with out seeing sex on the billboards, on sides of buses, TV Ads, etc. You subscribe to the magazines that parade woman around like hot beef on Sunday, lol! And there's nothing wrong with admiring the female form...but the objectifying and abuse of woman has grown into this wild free world of sexual frenzy, where everyone is over sexed, and living on fumes of lust (again,this applies only to those who feed into all of this). So you’ve created this monster, where women are giving it up on the 1st date.

One thing you have to know about women, is we want love. And most women feel “obligated” to have sex, even if they feel comfortable about it at first. Because they want to please you, to love you and be loved in return. It's sad that our morals have taken such a nose dive. But my “point” is that men have brought this on themselves. You cannot want a “good woman or wife” and then continue to make/ help endorse a generation of “loose women”. You can either have the “Prostitute” or the “Good Woman.” And if you're smart enough...then you would realize that if you treat the “good woman” right...she will give you MORE spice in your life than you can handle.

Peace and Blessings!

We can change. Each day is a new one. The choice is yours.

Happy New Year...Thanks and God Bless!

I agree for the most part, about women waiting. But I DO have a PROBLEM with the Title of the Topic. What you're talking about is, much broader. What was said can apply to both men & women throughout the US, if not the world. And to say that women in NJ are "not much better" is an insult to good, honest, hard working women like myself - who are still "single" because we ARE NOT giving it up.

I'm not hating...just voicing my concerns. And I've dated older men, who "claim" to want quality and would wait, and guess what? They couldn't handle it. Then when they get dumped by some easy piece, that they claimed to have fallen in love with, they get bitter and angry. And then all of a sudden, ALL women are lairs, cheaters, and manipulaters. You guys can't have it both ways. You have to do the work, and make the effort for a solid and lasting relationship too.

And shouldn't men (when they reach a certain age of maturity) wait too? Shouldn't they have the self-esteem, and self love/self worth, to hold off on intimacy? Men never seem to want to take responsibilty for their behavoir. But as soon as a women does it...all hell brakes loose. I'm not saying that women should get a "stud" card and equal "player" rights too. I think everyone should get back to what really matters. Finding people you really connect with and taking the time to enjoy the "whole" experience. That includes, friendship, chemistry, learning from each other, growing as a result, and discovering the little "mysteries" that make us all (as indivual) so special and unique.

Peace & Blessings!
:)

Hi!

Any good single Christian men on the East Coast? NY/NJ/PA? Age: 29-49?

Please feel free to message me,

Peace & Blessings!

Both. And the good Men should be cherished and loved too!

Peace & Blessings!

Amen! Thank you for the blessing!

AMEN!

Thanks, I really needed that. It's getting more difficult to stay focused on the positive. I don't watch TV but the news is still so negative online. The Lord sent me here for just this message. Thank you Jesus, Glory Hallelujah!