I have a question for all those who proclaim quite loudly and descriptively how hardened their heart is and how untrusting they are - Why are you on a dating website if that's how you feel?

If it's for socializing, there are plenty of non-dating websites.

I'd wear it, but then some my dresses/skirts are occasionally referred to as one of my "belts" by my kids.

You can always try leggings under the dress. You still get the look, but everything important is covered up.

Once again it's easy for everyone else to say "dump him."

If the two of you have something good going, give him a chance. Guys don't always think "romantically". TALK to him, don't just drop "hints", be prepared to give him examples of what YOU think is romantic. Also be prepared to offer a trade, maybe dressing in lingerie, something HE finds romantic.

If he still doesn't come up with anything, then you need to ask yourself if you can live with it. If you can, DO IT. If you can't, then it's time to look for someone who can give you what you want/need.

If the relationship is worth having and keeping, be prepared to put a lot of work into yourself.

Just my two cents.

Well, since we're quoting movies here, as Tom Cruise said in Risky Business - "Sometimes you just have to say what the fudge."

I also would counsel holding off for a while on the marriage, but if you have vacation time coming, why not go for a long visit? See if the euphoria lasts, if it does great! If not, you gave it a shot and tried, at least you DID something about it.

Find out what time sunset is - get to the beach about 5-10 minutes before that. Take along a jacket for her. DON'T take a blanket - that just says "I wanna do you on the beach" to some girls so don't take that chance.

Also take a thermos of cocoa, tea or coffee whatever her favorite drink would be.

Then as you walk on the beach tell her you wanted to share the sunset with her.

By the way, in my opinion, taking a short break and breaking up are two way different things.

If you want to find out if he owns his house, you can go the Hall of Records in whatever county he lives in and check. I think there's a small fee to look it up, but just give them the house address and they'll find out who owns it.

Why would that be a different story?? Both partners can still get an STD no matter who's tubes are tied.

Guys fall in love???!!

Geez, why play games? Just call and tell her that her actions have you confused and you'd like to know what the situation is. If she beats around the bush (so to speak) - then you have your answer. Otherwise, if she really is just busy, she'll tell you, and you'll still have your answer.

Again, it's really easy for other people to say walk away or dump him. It's not that EASY.

You need to pick a calm time when you're both alone with no upcoming appointments or commitments and TALK to him.

Tell him how YOU feel, not what he's doing wrong, but how what he's doing makes YOU feel.

You also need to ask yourself if you're better off with him or without him. I'm not just talking about the afraid to be alone thing - does he truly make your life better or not, does he make you feel good or not. Every relationship has rough patches - what's the relationship like over all?

He may just be being a total guy and not even realize what you're feeling. I go on the theory that if there are two ways to interpret what a guys says or does, one way hurts your feelings and the other way doesn't. He DOESN'T mean to hurt your feelings. Give him the benefit of the doubt, he's a GUY, and most likely he just doesn't see it. TELL him and then go from there.

JMHO

Marti Lou

You can listening to what she's saying with her mouth or you can listen to what she's saying with her actions.

You can't define anyone else's concept of love, only your own. Ask yourself if this is love according to your definition, if it's not, then realize it's not love.

It's easy for other people to say "dump her", but it's your emotions and your pain and your decision.

JMHO and wishing you the best. If only there was some way we could all just sleep past the pain. . .

Marti Lou

I'll admit that I don't know what men want. I listen when men SAY what they want, but when they get it - they're gone.

I'm thinking it's that "It's all about the chase" thing.

Leave you alone?! Does that mean we have to go to the sports bar and watch while you stay home???

I'm happy with myself, but I hate being single.

I don't want to be joined at the hip with someone, but I would like to have someone steady in my life. I miss being able to talk to someone (other than girlfriends) about the import things that happen in my life and the silly, trivial things too.

<sigh> Still single

I'm with solestria on this one.

I've had sex on the first date, I've waited weeks, I've waited months. The two relationships that I've had that lasted over 10 years each - both were sex on the first date. As long as everyone's safe and happy why not? Sex is so much FUN!

Quite honestly, if one of the guys had confessed to something like this, most of the women would be ready to shred him.

You need to reverse viewpoints on this. If he had lied to you, would you want to know about it or would you want him to just disappear?

You said you think your a good mother - you need to ask yourself what kind of example you're setting for your children. Unless they're infants, don't think they don't hear your phone conversations or realize that Mom is different when she's on the phone. Kids pick up way more than anyone gives them credit for.

If you're not happy in your marriage, you need to make a decision, stay or go.