I can see both sides of the issue. However, for me I want people to know something about me. I actually use it as a means to see who is really interest in me the person.

I get a lot of stupid questioned asked that are clearly on my profile. That tells me right away they are not really interested in getting to know me the person.

I prefer to see something on a profile. It tends to tell me that a person is vested in actually finding someone to date. With that said I take care in reading a profile looking for the RED FLAGS to avoid the scammers/fake profiles. They are easy to spot for the most part. Some are a little harder than others but, are easy non the less.

I don't respond to many profiles at all. I usually just read them. I spend more time on the forums letting people get to know me and my points of views. It helps them understand me and my profile.

OP, here is a thought. How about writing an original, thoughtful, charming, and possibly humorous message and see if that gets a response.

I apologize for suggesting it if you're incapable of accomplishing such a task.

As he alluded to, and as I agreed with...a lot of times even a "original, thoughtful, charming, and possibly humorous message" gets no reply.

So, I can see the point of after while getting frustrated with composing yet *another* "original, thoughtful, charming, and possibly humorous message" to send to someone who doesn't evennhave the basic decency to acknowledge it and if not interestred say so.

That BS about "no reply *is* a reply" is just that..BS.
It cost you nothing to be a decent human being and spend 30 seconds to type "thanks, but not interested/ we're not compatible".

"What you put out in the universe"...and all that....

Another thing to consider is the "Phishing Scams".
Once you reply, they mark you as a 'target'.
In regular email, they now have your email address and IP address which can reveal significant information about you or the information can be sold to data mining entities.
That's why you want to stay in the site's messaging system and not go offline to make contact till you're sure who you are talking with is who they claim to be.

I know, if I don't know you and you message me, I won't respond unless I am interested in meeting you. My silence tells you no, not interested and protects me from twisted motives of others.
Liars can be convincing and scammers are liars.

Replying online is different from replying in person.
In person, it is courteous but online it can be foolish.
Online, your manners can cause more harm then good because people take advantage of any opportunity you give them.

Odd you'd say that..in light of your previous posting:
"OP, here is a thought. How about writing an original, thoughtful, charming, and possibly humorous message and see if that gets a response.

I apologize for suggesting it if you're incapable of accomplishing such a task."

No, what you missed was the one that said there's no reason to be unecessarily rude/ insulting to someone asking what *they* feel is an honest question.

I never said I wasn't rude. Look at my name that'll give you a clue. I did not choose it randomly. All that said, I do not see how one thing relates to the other.

If you wish to get a response from someone then it seems logical to put in a decent effort.

If someone says something I believe to be illogical or stupid (*gasps*) my response will tend to be sarcastic or rude. That's me. I'm an acquired taste.

I usually respond to most of my messages ! Unless. They are one words like Hi.

Friend. Request I delete almost daily.

When men cannot get through my Filters, they send one.

I have heard several women complain that the men only sent them short messages, often filled with sexual innuendos.

Ladies, all I am saying is give us a fair chance.

How can we send something meaningful when you have not provided any info about yourself?

_____________________________________________________________________

The above is absolutely correct!

and it wouldn't hurt to send a nude photo with the other info on yourself.... gives us sometime to look at while we read the words.

I never respond to doubtful messages, I delete.
I've learned not to say all the polite rejections - the men reply with vulgarity and anger.

Better they're angry with being ignored, than me putting myself up for that kind of abuse.


.

I liked your words

Online dating is a numbers game, pure and simple. Not all women will respond back so to increase the chances of getting a date it starts out like this. Send out as many initial messages as you can. Let's say you find 25 ladies you like. Out of those 25 maybe 10 will respond back, and out of those 10 maybe just maybe one will end up on an actual date. So for a guy to write out a thoughtful paragraph for each initial message would make online dating so undesirable men just wouldn't do it.

Maybe that's how it works on other sites like Match, OKCupid, POF, and many others, but that's not how it works here.

This site began as JustSayHi, but the name was later changed to Mingle2 largely because of the forums. At the time this site began, the vast majority of dating sites did not have a discussion forum. So members were left to play the odds by messaging multiple women. But here at Mingle, the idea has been to get to know members through the forums **before** messaging. Through regular interaction in the forums, your chances of finding someone both receptive and compatible improve greatly.

So if you're using Mingle like you would every other dating site, you're cutting off your own legs, so to speak.

Makes sense. I just found the forums tonight. The other side is full of scammers and doesn't seem to have many real ladies in my area and age range.

It's a common mistake made by new members. It's partly why we don't have as many active participants in the forums as we used to.

But I've had 2 girlfriends because of Mingle. One was from profile/email. The other was met through the forums.

The former of the two read the forums but very rarely posted. She contacted me because she had read my posts.

With the latter, I had a relationship that lasted a little over 2 years.

In essence, I met both of them because of the forums.

Seems like it would be difficult to happen upon a lady on these forums in your area and in the age range. Probably be more likely to find a long distance relationship.

Yep..I agree...
The odds...
There are very few guys in my age range within 100 miles of me, period.
Then the few that are, are rarely online, and I doubt any are on the forums.

Im1wthu11,

I will say for most women to respond to you, you might want to fill out something on your profile and tell them about your self, what your looking for etc.

Most women are not going to respond to a blank profile. JS

I wish you the best of Luck.

Yes, that has long been the case.

Like I said, many newcomers make the mistake of ignoring the forums. Then when they get frustrated with playing email roulette, they leave the site without deactivating their profiles first. So we have an awful lot of inactive profiles that still show up in searches.

If more newcomers would actually participate in the forums rather than just sticking to search and email, over time it would become easier to find people in your local area and close to your own age. So all I can -- or anyone else -- can do is to encourage new members to be active in the forums.

I had a longer profile on here for years. I was looking for a boyfriend. I changed it about 2 months ago and I get the same messages.