Not your physical age, your personality preferences.

How often do you adhere to values and morals of your youth?

Do you look for dates, companions, friends that share those 'old' values?

What are some examples of qualities you look for that are distinctly related to your age and how YOU were raised that are different from other generations?

People at 50 now are considered in the tail end of the Baby Boomer generation.
There are a lot of us Baby Boomers.

How important is it to you to maintain the idealisms you grew up with?

If you have adult children or adult children with their own families, how important is it for them to adopt your ideals?
Can you accept the differences in ideals that other generations have?

I came of age, during the 1980s.

I've always figured it best, if I avoid the
morals of that era.

The morals and values that were installed in me from my parents, grandparents and other family are used by me everyday. I built my life based on them. Many of my decisions are based on them.

I would look for a woman who shares the same " core" values as I.

It is important as we age that we examine those teachings to see if they are still relevant to our life today. For instance, most of us are beyond the child raising years so some of the standards we maintained for our younger children are no longer needed. Also as we age, we need to reevaluate our expectations for dating and partners. Hopefully we have all gotten more comfortable with our bodies and are sexuality.

One of my most humbling experience was being in the hospital and so weak that the nurse had to help me use a urinal; so much for your masculinity and privacy!

One of the reasons I posted this thread was because I find that many of the values I had most of my life were built on delusion and inaccuracies.

When I got laid up and could no longer be a functional part of society my life needed to change or I knew I was going to go insane and kill myself.
Part of that change was to examine everything about me honestly.
I needed to remove my delusions and embrace the reality before me.

In trying to embrace reality I needed to look at my perceptions and determine if they were reality or deluision and I found that many of the morals and values I based my prior life around were in fact delusional or just flat out lies.

More importantly, I determined that some of my morals and values were reality. They are important because they are reality. Its been 10 years and I am still examining and still finding moral realities. Still identifying moral delusions.

The personality I seek may or may not have the same values and morals as I but the ones she has need to be reality. I have found women that have morals and values based in reality but also a disproportional number based in delusion. Of those women, I find it is their reluctance to consider the delusion that turns me off.

How often do you adhere to values and morals of your youth?
I am flexible. I adhere to the ones that are confirmed by reality and abandon those based on delusion.

Do you look for dates, companions, friends that share those 'old' values?
I look for her morals and values that are based on reality. I don't require them to be the same as mine but I do consider their validity.
I also look for her to consider not only the validity of her's but the validity of mine as well.

What are some examples of qualities you look for that are distinctly related to your age and how YOU were raised that are different from other generations?
First and foremost is respecting others as unique individuals.
Another is ownership of self.
Another is the ability to embrace reality over delusion.

How important is it to you to maintain the idealisms you grew up with?
The idealisms that I 'grew up with' are very different from the ones I adopted for raising my own children and are different now from then.
While the baseline is very different from how I was raised, the baseline now remains pretty much the same as when I was raising my family.


While I encourage the baselines I have adopted it is a suggestion not a command to my children. I allow my children to raise their families as they see fit, whether I agree with it or not, as long as the children are cared for in a healthy loving manner. My job as a parent now is that of an advisor, not a dictator. For the most part, I see a lot of me in my children in their core values and morals.

Can you accept the differences in ideals that other generations have?
Since I have learned to accept others as they are (I don't live behind their eyes), yes, I accept their ideals.
I also easily see where those ideals cause them stress and malcontent.
I offer considerations when I can to help them find contentment but I also know I can't make anyone change if they don't want to.

One example is mental, physical and sexual abuse victims.
Its alarming just how many people have based their ideals, values and morals on their history of abuse. Some perpetuate the abuse while others perpetuate the trauma of dealing with the abuse. The abuse, in one way or another, defines their baseline. It affects their ability to be honest, experience true enjoyment and sets an unfulfilling quest to be 'happy' all the time. For those people, true contentment is elusive and many can't identify it.

I'm active outgoing like meeting new people. I have values not willing to compromise on. Open minded and realize others have opinions that don't necessarily agree with mine.

Grew up in the 60's, can't say morals were high on the list.

I was born in 1961 and I started partying in 1968 and was a stoner till 1981 when I joined the service.
As a stoner, I was pretty mellow, low stress levels and not much got me worked up.
In the 80s, I switched to alcohol and the stress and drama shaped my morals.
In the late 80s I started a family and had to take a very hard look at my morals and how I wanted my children to grow up.
I chose responsibility and accepted the higher morals of family and community. Its those morals I adopted to raise my children that now define me, as a baseline.
Since my marriage ended, my moral attitude has switched from outward to inward.
I've learned to accept that other people are different and might have different moral standards than I. I still keep my basic morals but am more open to other people's moral standards, even when I don't agree with them.

I choose to surround myself with people that have moral standards in alignment with my own.
Those that don't align, I tend to ignore. To each their own an all that jazz.

Tom, you started partying when you were 7 years old?

Yeah, actually a bit younger than that but at 7 I was seeking out alcohol.
Used to go out drinking in my friend's brother's car.
I started smoking weed at 8 years old.
The first time I had what might be considered sex was at 5 years old with the neighbor girl under the porch.

Ok. I just think when people say they are partying, they're teenagers and a big group, drinking, dancing, no adults around and maybe some drugs.

As I was I was heading for prison or an early death.
I chose to change and now I can look back on that time, 50 years later, and shake my head.
I'm SO HAPPY my kids didn't go thru what I did and that is because I adopted new morals.

Grew up with a bottle of Seagram's7 in the fridge also next door was a bar. Remember standing on a chair to shoot pool. Didn't get into pot till later, I did do mothers little pills. also had a cousin lost a lot of those memories after an accident

that's nothin'...in 1954 as a 4 year old beatnik i began
mainlining heroin and pimped out my 7 year old sister...

A response I expected and you didn't dissappoint.
Thanx

Yeah, I teethed on dad's Seagram's. Mom used to put gin in my bottle to get me to take a nap.
I had a lot of "aunts and uncles" at all the local bars. Shuffle board was my childhood sport and pickled eggs was dinner. But hey, I got as much 'pop' as I could handle. What they didn't know is at least one or two of my "aunts and uncles" would come by and top it off for me with something better. Can't count the number of times I was awoken with a jolt to be rushed out cause mom or pop forgot I was with them. We didn't have speed dial or 911 back then but I knew all the bar phone numbers by heart.

My childhood morals consisted of do whatever it takes to stay alive.

Thing is, I like who I am now.
Despite how messed up my childhood was, if it didn't happen exactly as it did, I wouldn't be the person I am now.

I don't believe anyone here anymore.

I don't care if you believe me or not but consider this, why would I lie?
What benefit will I gain from it?
I expect no sympathy for my childhood because I have come to the understanding that my mistakes and my trials and tribulations in life made me who I am today and I like me. I would change nothing if I could.

What I have done is establish that I am better than I once was.
This is a benefit when considering that nobody here knows my history but it is a moot benefit because the likelihood of any connection that matters to my immediate life is not going to happen here. Still there is a chance.

The only reason why I share this information is because I am trying to allow y'all to understand me better so we can communicate on a better connection. If y'all can understand what makes me, me, it gives y'all a bit more insight to where I'm coming from when I comment on your topics.

My presence in these forums is an extension of my profile. I don't 'play' a persona, I am who I say I am. To the right woman, that cares to look, I think its pretty important so she has an accurate idea of who I am.

I don't believe you had sex at 5 years old.