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Topic: Recently widowed, does that turn you off?
snoopinaround's photo
Sat 04/01/17 09:58 AM


sorry, why i wrote that is;
i made a laughter at the beginning
and then i read the rest
and felt guilty and sorry.
..lol..all good.. just between you and me I don't think her husband died while making love... he probably killed over from carrying all the shoeboxes from the store

Hehehe. No comment.

IgorFrankensteen's photo
Sat 04/01/17 10:30 AM
I would put it this way.

When people try to build a relationship together that goes beyond simple friendships or business arrangements, they will always have to DISCOVER and follow paths of learning about themselves and each other, which are laid down by the experiences each of them brings to the situation.

Trying to become involved romantically with a widowed person will be involve different "paths" or learning concerns, than trying to become involved with a divorced person, and both will be different from the paths of learning that must be followed with someone who has never been in such a relationship before.

When anything is new to a person, they will be more likely to misunderstand, to make mistakes, or to bring along false assumptions. In turn, the other person in the pairing, might well "read" those mistakes as being proof that the two are inherently incompatible.

All a way to say that all unique factors about a person, makes their journey to find love more difficult for them. The only useful way to deal with that simple fact, is to accept the difficulties.

I could liken it to someone hoping to become an athlete, who has lost an appendage. They will only succeed, if they accept that they will have to work harder or at least differently, from someone who has not had such a loss.

Godsfriend10's photo
Sat 04/01/17 11:06 AM

it could be a problem , because people go by their past experiences and the mind naturally makes generalizatindividual d upon those experiences

if a person is willing to start new with you, however, and treat you as a new and unique individual, it may not be a hindrance to their getting to at least know you

Id say it just all depends upon the person, I have things like that, like someone in their late forties who was never married or had kids,,, is a turn off for me, only because I do not feel such a person is a match

someone who has never experienced loss, may not feel they could relate to what you are going through ,,,,



Msharmony,you deserve a million dollars for making the above points:thumbsup:
Most of the guys who have posted so far are just been emotional rather than logical.
She needs to mourn her late husband and get done with it. And treat whosoever she opens her heart to as a different individual from her ex husband.

esesheri's photo
Mon 04/03/17 02:22 AM
hi love, widowed too. it can get lonely at times. can understand what you are going through

no photo
Mon 04/03/17 06:01 AM
I would look for BOB battery operated boyfriend, you believed in sickness and health til death. Do not be in a hurry, and settle with casual sex, you can find a new husband who wants a one and only relationship. Sorry for your lost, love your loyalty, praying for you.

no photo
Mon 04/03/17 06:09 AM
IMO

Depends on what "recently" means, if it means a year.. or so, no it wouldn't matter to me.

If it means a week.. or so.. yes, it would matter to me.

sybariticguy's photo
Wed 04/05/17 01:48 PM
Lets also not forget how many spouses wish their former spouse were in fact dead too It was reported that even after 10 years 52 % of partners divorced were still mad at one another Talk about not moving on and letting go.....

DazzlingAsian's photo
Thu 04/06/17 02:02 AM
nope

ebutu1975's photo
Thu 04/06/17 10:28 AM
well it doesnt turn me off so if you dont mind i would love to write you

dude1125's photo
Thu 04/06/17 11:01 AM
If your just looking for some fun I think I could help you out in that department;)

BamaGal276's photo
Thu 04/06/17 05:09 PM
I became a widow 9 years ago, it's difficult , I know how you feel. I thought I was ready a few years back but like you I didn't know what I wanted. I've been on dates but only dated one guy in those 9 years. Take your time and people have to realize it's different losing a spouse to death and losing them in a divorce. You'll get there, figure out what you want and when you do you'll find what you need.

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