do you ever feel unmatchable?

I mean, in real life you get to know people and its easier to quickly sense how well you match.

On the internet, the only clues are self descriptions to help narrow tings down. So, if you are not an outdoors, walks on the beach, gym going, nature loving female,,

but you still love the conversation of an indoorsy, loves music and movies but still manages to be witty and masculine

how do you match up?



anyway, the topic is do YOU ever feel unmatchable?

I feel "unmatchable" most of the time. Because I know how weird I am.

Of course, what makes it extra tough online, is that it seems to be almost a rule, that women claim to want long walks on the beach (in Omaha?), and all sorts of other outdoors adventures.

I figure that's due to "profile-itis," which is the online disease, where you think you have to make your profile look like everyone else's.

I am VERY glad to see one thing: I'm not alone in periodically typing "ting" when I mean "thing." Wish I could find a spellcheck setting to mark CORRECTLY spelled, but wrong words, for checking.

I like the idea of a witty masculine homebody being appealing to SOME women out there at least.

I feel unmatchable here. I'm not one to be attracted to a photo and I'm not exactly a great conversationalist when it comes to messaging with a stranger.

I do read profiles and since most men list outdoor and athletic activities and appear to be searching for a woman that wants to go camping and motorcycle riding I just instantly think I'm not what he'd want.

You know what's really sad? So many of us are truly good decent people with so much to offer and yet it's impossible to know that from a few sentences in a profile.

I agree cinti, except pictures can help with what image a person seems to want to put out


and you notice that outdoorsy, sportsy trend too?

lol,, glad Im not the only one

I don't feel unmatchable at all because I believe I am a very flexible person and easy to get along with....finding a match online is not that easy at all to just do it with clicking buttons for it takes time to know one. I don't bother to check the matches at all, it maybe a help to some people to narrow down their choices or preferences but still it boils down to who is really interested to take a step to get to know one and make a real connection, only then you would know if you are both compatible with each other and willing to accept both your flaws or imperfections.

Trying to figure out who a person is with just a profile is almost impossible. Can be deceiving. I liked the chat rooms years ago where we would chat and then talk on the phone soon after. The forums are good as most people I think are pretty honest and you get a feel of who they are but it's a long process.

As for unmatchables, I was with my ex for 24 years and we couldn't be more different in so many ways but we got along great for many years until the last few.

Sometimes you may perceive someone as being completely unmatchable but isn't the case at all.

I seem to be unmatchable. I'm too old for the things I do, even among male peers, so finding a female so active as me is impossible. I don't fit the mold, or the usual demographics. I'm no oil painting, and not loaded, so younger active ladies aren't interested. I'm too old for many dating sites, but too young for over 50 groups, (full of real oldies). And then if I do find a 'match', she prefers tall men, so unmatchable again.
I did find a match once, someone I already admired from years before, and we had many good times, but she passed away; irreplaceable. Unmatchable again.

Unmatchability =
No. of nearby possibly acceptable matches /
(your fussiness X your attractiveness)

eg. Near me possibly acceptable matches = ~5
my fussiness = 6
my attractiveness = 1
5 / (6 x 1) = 0.833, so I have less than one chance of a match. Sounds about right, but I'm no mathematician. :)

Unmatchable. I like that term. Hopefully there is a match for everyone. That's why I like this site

always matchable, always willing to go that extra mile.
Found quite a few matches on here...went out on a few dates....talk with many.....yep, there is always a but.....but in the end, something is missing....yup....chemistry!!!just saying...

No.
Love and dates are easy if you stop fighting natural instinct and live as a slave to social training.


IMO not really.
In real life you get more informative feedback to know how much effort you'll have to put into it.

You don't really know how well you match until you start doing things together that test your compatibility.

And a lot of people seem to have a false idea of who they are compatible with.


On the internet all you have is who you think you are, who you think the other person is, who you want the other person to think you are, and who the other person is trying to get you to see them as.

There's very little of who you actually are, on the internet.


By getting over yourself and being around (ach!) strangers and interacting with a lot of people face to face, reality to reality, allowing who you really are to interact with the environment together.


No. People aren't unique or all that different.
To me it's kind of like dogs.
Online all you get to find out is if someone can shake hands, or roll over, and you ask "do you shake with your left hand or right? Do you roll over to the left, or right? OMG! To the left! Perv! Incompatible!!!!!"

What makes people compatible are the involuntary actions, the sneezes, of human behavior.
Did they tense up, feel uncomfortable and distant due to fear response because there are a bunch of black/white people at the next table, did their humor turn dark and kind of attacking because of it? They may have spent all day online talking about how open minded and progressive they are, how they don't care about interracial relationships, and everyone has the free will and choice to see who they want.

Did they start seeming distracted whenever a cute waitress comes up, or pretty girl walk by, or overcompensate with over friendliness and interaction? Look at little too hard at trying not to look at them? They may have spent hours online telling you how happy they are in life, how content being single, that is was their choice, while really they're desperately single and are responding to every attraction impulse that comes along.


There is no such thing as unmatchable.
There's only how much effort you are going to put into protecting the fake crap of who you think you are rather than accept what you really are and what's motivating you.

Potentially amusing observation:

the term "unmatchable" sounds a bit depressing and negative.

How about if we start calling ourselves Matchless in stead?

When they say that about movies or accomplishments, it's a GOOD thing.

Its not unmatchable. Too many just don't understand compromise. And its often one sided.

it may be due to the fact that I am a walking contradiction


on one hand I want a man with a brain, someone who is witty, intelligent

and might know his way around a wine list


of course, if he spouts of at the mouth

quotes from every book he has ever read? ya I am gonna throw the book at him

and if he is stuck up and snooty and too good for an occasional McD's on the road? or gas station coffee if ya have to?

I mean I am all for gourmet sometimes but who can afford to buy all those ingredients all the time??

I could give a rat's azz if my living room is Feng Shui

some of my stuff I inherited from Ma and Grandma so deal with it buster

so that means going other direction

the so-called manly man

the outdoorsman

the guy who knows how to wear flannel, hunt, fish and drive a truck


of course if he dribbles chew on my carpet I am gonna kill him

he can hunt all he wants to but I am not skinnin or gutting cause ewwww

great let's go eat at the Ma and Pa place up the road

but if the word " duh" comes outta your mouth while reading the menu??

I'm gone

I don't connect with anyone.

I haven't had much luck either, so I suppose I am matchless as well. It's not that I think I am unmatchable, I just haven't had much luck yet. I also think that some people put things on their profiles that they would like to do but don't really do. As for me, I put things on my profile that I actually do enjoy doing, but don't do all the time. That way a potential match has an idea of what we may want to do on a date.

And yes, I like taking walks along the beach, but it's only about 15 minutes away! LOL

Hmmmm. I'll pick Yes. As I have gotten older my requirements have increased dramatically.

I'm not going to list out all of my requirements because I quite frankly don't have that much time to do it.

But, as a young man, I assumed everybody was like me.

Then I found out most people are absolutely bat sheet crazy!

I can NOT stand drama. Many people can't live without it. I have been called "Boring" and "Predictable". I take that as a compliment. I enjoy many activities but they are always drama free.

So, essentially with my requirements, I have made myself "Un-Matchable."

I do find that I get along with most people though in a non-romantic way because I'm more tolerant of them.

Nobody is unmatchable....maybe your just not in the right place. I read often that people would have much better luck meeting at places of interest to them...I believe this and that there is somebody for everyone.

Unmatchable and undateable...

Yeah! I did meet one at my place of interest.....ah! when I was much much younger...I never asked, but she gave me her phone number...she was a go-go dancer, to be polite...and she only called when it was a slow day at work for her.....yep, I was a big tipper...lol...Needless to say, that did not last too long...lol...