Just did an "advanced search" on this site: where you put in the specs. for everything you want incl. religion/hair/kids: real detailed. 16 men came up in the results, using the 15 mile filter, out of the profiles of 5 that were physically attractive to me there were no interests/lifestyles in common. So, back to blocking scammers.

I also don't find any of my gf's husbands/boyfriends attractive at all, does that mean that all of these intelligent, successful women just settled based on personality traits over physical attraction? To hear them talk each of their guys has specific problems they deal with regularly as to behavior etc...so what was the point of settling if you can't say EVERYTHING about him is great except for one thing. Seems like if it's more than one thing then everyday will be a compromise with this person? (& yes I know that my friends may not be telling me the whole story but I'm basing this on what I do know about them).

Can it really be that hard to find someone that I will enjoy spending time with both dressed AND naked? Oh, BTW the second man I've met through this site (1st used a decade old photo & he didn't age well) intimated that I might enjoy going to a gun range (one of his hobbies NOT listed in his profile). Sighhhh...

Sounds like you had a great time

Not picky, maybe unrealistic though.
No one is perfect, issues will always emerge
when you get to know someone deeply.
It is called life.

You seem fond of the term 'settled' when your
friends actually married the men they wanted.
That is not settling.
That, is achieving the dream.

It is a shame you feel you cannot chat with
anyone who is not physically what you think
you want...many connections can come by getting
to know the inside rather than relying on
the outsides of people.

Seems your friends took the time.

^^^This...

And the problem with dating sites is that you have little else to go on than a picture, so you tend to solely focus on looks.
Maybe you remember the popular guys at school that everyone wanted? They weren't always the good-looking hunks, often a far cry from that, yet every girl was in love with 'em.. Same thing with girls..
Often someone who's not all that good-looking can be(come) very attractive just because of their personality, the way they carry themselves.
I mean, let's be honest here, 99% of the human race aren't exactly model material. Still most of them are attractive to at least 1 other person..
Beauty & being considered attractive is in the eye of the beholder..

And things you don't like... have you ever met someone that you liked 100%?
It just depends what it is you don't like about someone and if you can live with it or not. And that should be a careful consideration, cos yes, we can be -way too- fussy.

I still believe the best way to meet someone good is real life, not a dating site. Works for a mere handful, not for most, otherwise there wouldn't be a gazillion of singles anymore.

Adding to the past few posts, you may not realize the right person till you meet them. Many have visualizations of what they think the perfect person would be, only to fail in those types of relationships. You may seek strength when too much causes friction. You may seek physical attractiveness which leads you to narcissism. The type of intelligence you think you are attracted to may be better served by a completely different brain function. A highly developed sense of humor may steal your heart.

Yes, you need to be a little more open minded.

Just a little!

Hey! I saw what you wrote in the forum about not finding mr right.

This link below is a clip about a woman who was being very specific what she wanted,while everybody else said she was too picky.It may give you more inspiration on your search.I really recommend listening to the presentation, even i as a guy found it useful.And i hope you do to..

/ Jonas

https://www.ted.com/talks/amy_webb_how_i_hacked_online_dating

No one is perfect until you fall in love with them

yep.. way too picky.. Not many perfect men out there.. not many perfect women either.

Imperfections make a person who they are, especially physical.

You don't want a guy who feels he has to constantly live up to your standards as opposed to being himself... do you?

for to look beyond the skin and no eye will miss the the beauty of the soul.

peace

That is so true....

Wow...op.. someone is going to have to get used to ,the ideal of settling for just(( you)).. and all your imperfections..lol

I am the right combination

Hmmm. I think physical attraction is important, even if it's definitely not the main focus. The men here are being hypocritical when they talk about soul and looking beyond the skin. Males are fixated on the visual. Unfortunately, either the man is good looking but shallow/lacks character and dull, or intelligent and sweet but physically unappealing. It's difficult to find the right combination.

Did I forget to mention humble?

you mean the men YOU DATE.

i would be with ANY PERSON, WHOM DOES NOT RESTRICT THE FREE MIND OF ANOTHER, FAT, SKINNY, TALL, SHORT, UGLY, BEAUTIFUL!

Not the men I date. Men are known to be visual.

That was a great clip! Thanks for sharing that, very informative and a lot of fun to watch

women are known to be possessive and jealous...

women are know to be ho's...

huh...

such hogwashz...

how would those fine generalizations go over with you?

they wouldn't.

and neither do your's.

complete and total generalizations.

so totally not based upon EACH INDIVIDUAL.

it's like saying "all old people are know to be senile"...

total crapz untruth.

no different than saying all blacks are thugs...

or all whites are preps...

totally crapz shootz stereotypes, which will simply hide any good person from the lens of those who see through such small minded prejudiced thinking.

smiles