Can a person be too damaged from difficult pasts to form a relationship or is there always someone for everyone as they say?

.. well I know some pretty messed up people.... and there in relationships.
. so it is possible.. I guess it comes down to.. how much you want to work on your issues.. and how many of your issues you are willing to leave in the past.. forgiveness.. and letting things go.. goes a long ways...hmm

ABsoLUTEly people can be too damaged to form a *normal*, healthy relationship with others; they can also get over difficult pasts and become able to, OP.



People can be too damaged AND there will always be someone for them, too...*normally*, it'll be an equally-damaged soul, who's not the least bit interested in overcoming their hurtful pasts, either.

I found that when getting out of a long term relationship, almost 20 years, it took time to readjust to being on my own. Time to separate my mind and feelings that were so focused on my husband for so many years that I had lost part of me.

And it actually took my going through a couple more causal (non-sexual) relationships in the 2+ years since our divorce to get my feet back on solid ground and be happy with me again. Figuring out what I want and don't want for my future relationships was what I realized I was doing without consciously thinking about it.

Was it all easy and peachy? Heck no! I made some blunders, but learned quickly.

I hope this helps some...

Welcome to Mingle and the forums... enjoy your stay here..

You can carry baggage all of your life.
If you choose to.

. nothing for nothing.. but not the kind of relationship I want to be in..
two crazies don't make a right..
you should want to work on yourself.
before dragging someone else into your.. personal nightmare... sorry that wasn't for you..ok..

I agree

There is always someone out there... Just have to get out more where you are around others more... At times it just may take longer to find that one that there is a connection with... Then things seem to work themselves out....

You must first be the person you need to be for yourself...


The little bird said...

Yeah, they have.

Water will always seek its own level

I have strong faith, I don't believe there is anyone who is beyond repair or improvement. Some just will take a lot more work than others and not everyone is interested in doing that work upon themselves.

I've known folks who stay in this funk for what seems like an eternity. I'm talking about adults here, could affect any age. It's almost like watching someone carry a residual virus and shutting out the potential opportunities because of one instance. Things happen in your life, stuff doesn't work out, especially the things we can't have power over. No reason to stay in that madness.

Have you met some married couples out there? Hell, some of them should never have been allowed to procreate. So...I'm just saying...there is hope.

I believe there are reasons we attract and seek out certain types, Whether we realize it or not. I also believe that emotionally the healthier we are we will attract the same.

When you become a granny, there is a guy on here that will take you .... Yes, there is hope.

Thanks guys for your comments, funny and useful xxxx

we as humans have the ability to heal, both physical damage and emotional damage, but both require thr same commodity.....time.

just like when you break your arm, you dont try to use it the next day, instead you put it how it is supposed to be (this will hurt), and you put a cast on it and just wait.

people often forget that the same process is needed for emotional wounds, put yourself back they way you know is right for you (this may hurt) and just give it time.

but the biggest thing is if it is your heart that is damaged DON'T try to use it right away give it time, then just like any other injury slowly startito exercise it until it is back to full strength