This is pretty random...I am mom of two kids, one who has autism..I have been seperated for little while, divorce is almost done..I work two jobs and I go to school full time...I don't really have anyone I am really interested in right now who I would consider relationship material in fact I don't really ever see me getting back into a real relationship anyway...so is having a friend with benefits such a bad idea? considering the circumstances that is lol.

I love older woman.. like u!

wow i think ur marvolous to able to keep every thing going on ur own.a friend with benifits is the the least u should be looking for ya deserve a lot more

I completely agree with what is said here, keep looking for the right guy for you, you might have to kiss a few frogs but you will find the one for you.

Someone always will get hurt in a fwb situation. Think carefully before you do it, if you do.

it is up to you to decide what is the right thing for you to do. some people see no problem with it. Others say they end up feeling used. maybe it depends on how comfortable you are with the idea of sex without love and committment

Mmmmmmmm,a relationship takes work,and hard work to keep it-in which case,adding onto your load might break your back!
In reality,some women end up entangled in these fwbs and may end up falling for the guy(or vice versa)!!
If you feel you are emotionaly strong,can stand on your own and can take on a fwb,then go ahead and enjoy yourself!
Hopefuly,you wont feel the urge to offload on fwb or call ''just to talk''(complicating things)!

yes, I'm a firm believer that all women should give their guy friends as many benefits as they can...

If he's a friend wouldn't he also be someone that you confide in and talk to about your problems and all of that stuff anyway? As I understand it, a "friend with benefits" isn't somebody that you don't have any feelings for and just have sex with and that's why it can get complicated.

Anyway, sounds like you are on the rebound and there are loads of women out there just out of relationships saying this sort of thing and I personally avoid them but I'm sure that you will get plenty of offers from men that are also just looking for a fling.

Having Male friends for Sex, without love and committment is just Sex and that can never lead to a worthwhile friendship. What example would that be setting for your children even. When Children are involved, we should always think, What would be best for them too.

With the right girl it can be a blast, but its a slippery slope you know.

Summarizing the prior postings, I heard:
o You deserve a lot more,
o Wait until you find the right guy,
o You may feel used,
o You may feel feel guilty because it isn't "right",
o You may get entangled,
o If you can, go for it,
o Warning: Just sex will never lead to a worthwhile friendship,
o No! Think of the children!

Regarding the first argument that you "deserve" more, I don't buy it. It's like going hungry with your friends at the Dairy Queen because you "deserve" a steak. Beware, however, that there is an opportunity cost with having FWBs: If your social groups gain an awareness that this is a fixed part of being you, it will scare off more serious suitors. Stated another way, if you get the "rep", you're stuck with it.

Regarding the concern about your kids, I assume this would be on the down-low.

But I totally get that your busy life may not really have the time for tending to a real "relationship", and the question you have to ask yourself is if you're willing to be celibate for the next 10 years while things calm down. I think you decided, "no".

Best of luck to you. Hang in there. Keep us posted.

Humm in reality it only depends if you can handle the FWB issue.... Most the time women tend to let emotions get the best of them...

Life is tough raising two kids and when one needs special attention makes things a big harder....

I have been there done that it is not easy to make time for another but it can be done... My advise is hang on let things settle down a bit from the divorce and all. Once things does you will get in a new routine and if you find someone special you want to spend that time with you will find the time...

But then if FWB is for you go for it as long as you can handle the issues that stem from one...

My background is very Different (Won't get into how) but I found out the hard way, friends with Benefits is a good way to get into trouble; Big Time.

thats gud. Iwish to know u more

I recently got out of a bad, abusive marriage and have no desire for a real relationship now, so I'm going the fwb route. It's working great! Only problem is that its the best sex of my life and I know the day is coming that I have to let it go... If you choose it, you have to be able to keep your emotions for your friend separate from the sexual aspect. It's a fine line that really screws things up if crossed.

So is having a friend with benefits such a bad idea?

The answer to that question depends on several factors.

For example, does such a thing conflict with whatever faith/religion that you profess to believe in?

I had a good male friend who became a friend with benefits. Eventually, we progressed to an acknowledged relationship, although he had to kind of talk me into it, as I was actually trying to avoid relationships at the time due to some bad experiences I wanted to get over first, and I also had reservations about whether we were truly compatible enough to "go the distance" together for the long haul.

We wound up spending a decade together as a married couple. In the end, we discovered we really weren't made to be compatible for the long haul, and ended our marriage.

Through all of this, he is still one of my best friends. We don't sleep together anymore, though. The attraction just isn't there, and in fact the waning of that was one of the contributing factors in the demise of our marriage. (It was not the only one, however. And no, neither of us cheated. We simply grew apart.)

So no, not all FWB situations are necessarily a bad idea, nor do they preclude a good friendship or even the development of a deeper relationship. On the other hand, not all of them will include these things either. Your mileage will vary based on your own situation and that of the person you choose as your FWB.

as long as the two of u r ok with it let it roll

Ya gotta be pretty cold blooded to make a FWB relationship work.