I have always considered married and still attached people as off limits, but who knows what goes on behind closed doors, and it may be a nearly over marriage if he is looking for some extra marrital. It takes two to tango, so why should anyone criticize you for sleeping with a married man, whatever the term for it is.

I'm not married, so it wouldn't be my husband, which would mean it's none of my business.

Hi, singmesweet... if your affair is with a married man in an open marriage, I believe that "plaything" has a nice ring to it..

Ok, but again it's none of my business who someone else sleeps with. I'm not going to criticize the OP for it.

is this a concern about public opinion on actions after already committing the deed? or is this query about looking for permissions on a future act?? if it's the latter.. let your conscience be your guide..

but if you've already slept with him.. what's the point? what's done is done so.. as they say.. you'll have to live with the consequences of your own actions..

if it were my husband/partner? (although currently don't HAVE any) you could have him.. cuz I'd say good bye and good luck to the both of you! however.. I would consider the perpetrator a person of either low self esteem that can't find any single mates, so have to lure someone else's astray.. or one that cannot commit to a 'normal' relationship so finds solace in tempting others into a fling..

only of course, after the initial hurt and calling both every 'derogatory' word in the dictionary!

Uh Oh!! Someone is bored......

You guys may be thinking I am a big old 'ho but I had a live in boyfriend DURING my divorce. I did not cheat on my husband while we were under the same roof but my divorce was final in Sept. and I moved in my boyfriend just before then.

I know all you who know me well are going "Well, that's Terri". You are not shocked.

Oh and earlier this year, I did date a guy going through a divorce.

I am not saying it's ideal. I am just saying I would be the pot calling the kettle black to judge.

the only reason i posted this was because i talked about it elsewhere and was slammed with whore, slut, hoe, etc.
apparently most people think i'm a bad person if i knowingly sleep with someone who's married.
some people even stopped talking to me!

The nerve!!!

douches!

People are weird. I had people who wanted me to get back with my ex husband stop talking to me. Likely magically, they could will our marriage that was horrible to stay together.

thats the grey area

when I was younger, there was a whole eight years between the time my husband and I actually physically went seperate ways and the tie we legally 'divorced'

we obviously dated during that time, but neither of us was under the delusion that we were still part of a marriage anywhere but on paper, we didnt share a home, we didnt share a life,,,,,we just hadnt bothered with the expense of a divorce yet


now that I am older, and a second marriage ended(in 2009) my preference is to have a divorce before I move on, for my own conscience perhaps and because my second husband is delusional about our situation

sometimes people are only married on paper, but the individuals have agreed to move on with seperate lives,,, in which case I wouldnt consider those they dated in a bad light even though they are technically still adulterer/adultresses

it is those situations where people know the lover is going back HOME to a spouse who is sharing a life with them , that the lover is 'sneaking around' on someone else

that those people, in my eyes, are held in lower regard,,,,,(along with the cheating spouse of course)

I always feel ashamed then I admit it (and I should feel ashamed), but during an earlier time in my life, I made the mistake of having sex with a woman who was married to someone else (I was single at the time). My decision to do such a thing was the beginning of my personal downfall. Although I later repented of my sin and received God's forgiveness, I still had to endure the negative consequences of my actions.

To use an old expression, don't do the crime if you can't do the time. So, if you can't handle being called an immoral person, then don't commit adultery.

Conscience is an interesting thing isn't it?

absolutely, where would we be with out it?

Sad thing is, Some people are immoral and they just don't care if they are.

... what you sow is what you reap...

i'm immoral because i don't agree with your morals.
i think i'm perfectly fine.

this is the truest words spoken


you indeed reap it,,,those who steal will have something prized stolen from them eventually

I firmly believe it,,,

as far as I'm concerned.. live and let live.. but it doesn't mean I'll encourage the act NOR get involved if it has nothing to do with myself OR family/friends!

do I condone it? no.. only because my ex cheated on me and I didn't like how I was left to feel.. sadly there is always a victim and in my mind he had betrayed our vows AND our family unit.. what did I think of HER? truth be known.. I did call her several nasty derogatory words!

as my dad used to say.. "you have to look at yourself in the mirror and live with the consequences or any guilt you may feel".. that said.. I typically try to put myself in the others' shoes and if it's a situation I'd not feel comfortable in mySELF..? I refrain from acting further.. ultimately it IS your life to do with as you may!