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| Topic: We don't have the right? | |
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I think a lot of medical history needs to be out in the open too. I'd be plenty pissed if someone was HIV positive and didn't want to tell me about it. Ditto with other STD's and other transmissable diseases. Privacy is one thing, general honesty and public safety is another.
I also agree with the need to tell folks about transgender changes. I don't know how I would react, in a dating arraingement, though I personally have no problems with it. |
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I was surfing the web, and came across a discussion where someone asked how to tell if someone was transgender. Most of the responses were that the only way was to ask, but you don't have the right to ask. I disagree. I think we certainly do have the right to know such information about someone we are dating. What are your thoughts? Such the dilemma.... The fact that you doubt alone would be an answer i would imagine, unless you want it in writing i guess (insert appropriate shrug smiley) |
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I think a lot of medical history needs to be out in the open too. I'd be plenty pissed if someone was HIV positive and didn't want to tell me about it. Ditto with other STD's and other transmissable diseases. Privacy is one thing, general honesty and public safety is another. I also agree with the need to tell folks about transgender changes. I don't know how I would react, in a dating arraingement, though I personally have no problems with it. Good point. I wonder if they also feel that one with STDs has the right to with hold that information as well. That also is medical history, but I agree that it should be disclosed when dating. |
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I was surfing the web, and came across a discussion where someone asked how to tell if someone was transgender. Most of the responses were that the only way was to ask, but you don't have the right to ask. I disagree. I think we certainly do have the right to know such information about someone we are dating. What are your thoughts? Such the dilemma.... The fact that you doubt alone would be an answer i would imagine, unless you want it in writing i guess (insert appropriate shrug smiley) If I have any doubt about someone being who they say they are, I don't stick around long enough to ask questions. |
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There you go!...so why go through the drama of asking??
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It was something I came across online, and was just curious as to what others thought about it.
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Fair nuff
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That's a really messed-up policy. I suppose next you will call someone extreme if they're missing an eye and wearing a prosthesis. I have my own thoughts about that whole nature of gender, and why anyone feels the need for surgical correction, kind of thing. But they are who they are. You know, if everyone self-disclosed those parts of themselves that were problematic, I'd have never married and I wouldn't have dated 2/3rds of the guys I've dated because I'd have known ahead of time and could avoid them. You don't make people self-disclose here when they're cheaters, narcissists, sociopaths... But you'll pick on the transgendered. Well, guess which groups do more damage. Quit catering to people who are extremely in the closet (let's face it, otherwise they could just say "sorry, not interested" and move on) and get with the 21st century. Just saying. So you're saying my rights don't matter as long as we accept transgenders? |
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..i think if we would learn to accept each other for who we are rather than what we expect than acceptance would come a lot faster.. 
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..i think if we would learn to accept each other for who we are rather than what we expect than acceptance would come a lot faster..
We have the right not to date transgenders if we choose. If you choose to be transgender, then you should respect the rights of others, just as you expect others to respect your rights. |
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I asked two or three women on another dating site directly if they were men originally.
That site does encourage transgenders. The three women I asked, each individually and independently from each other, got extremely upset and rude with me. what do I mean? She is not feminine enough? What do I mean? She looks like a man? i tried to appease them, by saying that they are feminine, very much so, but so are some cross dressers. This did not appease them. Then I told them what it was that had made me suspicious (too large or strong-appearing hands, too large an Adam's Apple on the front of their neck, a strong jaw), and they reported me to the site owner, who shrugged his shoulders and asked them are you men, women, or both? So a direct question is not the best policy at best of times, because hell hath no fury like a woman thcorned. |
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"what one generation tollerates, the next generation will embrace." How I wish my parents and their generation tolerated having six to six hundred beautiful blonde women as loves to every stumpy little Jew like me. I haven't embraced a beautiful blonde for over a decade now, and it's mutual. Drat, and double drat. |
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We do not allow transgender, transvestites, cross dressers etc. This works against what we're trying to do here. This is an adult website, granted, but we do want to keep it more in the mainstream of dating. For those who are into that sort of lifestyle, there are sites geared towards that. While we certainly do not condemn anyone for their preferences, we do have a goal, and this type of lifestyle simply does not fit in with our commitment, of providing a nice atmosphere for our users. We are open to the gay community, sure, but extremists, no. I just found it interesting how offended people seemed by the one who posted the question. They said you don't have a right to know such information, because it's medical history. But, I disagree, because it changes ones identity, and we have the right to know a persons true identity, at least I would hope we still have that right. I think knowing a person's medicl history before you enter into a relationship is very important. Some medical conditions can effect future generations. |
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This is the second time in less than a week that I am in total shock at what I'm reading on Mingle.
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"what one generation tollerates, the next generation will embrace." How I wish my parents and their generation tolerated having six to six hundred beautiful blonde women as loves to every stumpy little Jew like me. I haven't embraced a beautiful blonde for over a decade now, and it's mutual. Drat, and double drat.  
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How would one know except for asking>
Remember Pat on SNL? I believe, it would be misleading for a transgender to withhold the info. That gives the other person freedom to choose. |
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Yeah, I think if you have to ask after like 3 years or so, then maybe there's bigger concerns with the relationship to worry about, but if you're just getting to know one another and just starting to date, I don't see anything wrong with asking, it's part of getting to know someone. Now, you got me to wondering, though...just how would one broach this subject? |
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I think a lot of medical history needs to be out in the open too. I'd be plenty pissed if someone was HIV positive and didn't want to tell me about it. Ditto with other STD's and other transmissable diseases. Privacy is one thing, general honesty and public safety is another. I also agree with the need to tell folks about transgender changes. I don't know how I would react, in a dating arraingement, though I personally have no problems with it. Good point. I wonder if they also feel that one with STDs has the right to with hold that information as well. That also is medical history, but I agree that it should be disclosed when dating. EXCELLENT Point! |
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i need to know cuz of reasons
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Edited by
willing2
on
Sun 05/20/12 11:59 AM
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Yeah, I think if you have to ask after like 3 years or so, then maybe there's bigger concerns with the relationship to worry about, but if you're just getting to know one another and just starting to date, I don't see anything wrong with asking, it's part of getting to know someone. Now, you got me to wondering, though...just how would one broach this subject? Hey, are you a woman who was born a man? I see it all the time on Jerry Springer. It could work out like this, http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wBG2mYBPwV0 or, like this, http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Nsdrcjelt1w |
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