ok so there is a girl I know and have been talking
to online for some time now, she seem very into me
although i am not in to the online relationship thing
especially at a distance.

Anyway we were talking and she asked for my number and
we talked for about 4 hours, I enjoyed talking to her
and we have a lot in common. now i am not thinking anything
major here but it's nice to have someone like that you know.

Here is my issue I have no trust for people online,
I am very popular a lot of places online on forums
and games. people have played jokes before trying
to make me look that fool or embarrasses me.

She says she is reclusive since an accident
a little over a year ago and normally hides
from people. has no photos online and uses
her aunts facebook when we talk there.

I asked for a pix and she provided one
and says she is kinda shy because she has scars
from the accident and does not have many pix.

She did cry a lot on the phone when we talked
of the accident so I do tend to believe it.

But i feel she is not being truthful and the girl
in the picture she did send is very beautiful.

Now i know she is holding things back but idk
what and feel that maybe that picture is not her
and that she might be scared to show me the real
her.

5 minutes ago I asked her to take a picture with
a sign with her saying hi mike it's ******.

Was this going to far and am I overly distrusting,
I searched the accident but can't find anything
but that means nothing as it's old and I may not
be searching properly.

She is more then willing to take the picture
which makes me wonder if i am an a$$ for making
this poor girl who likes to hide take pictures
of herself to please me.

She lives in the states so we will likely never
become anything more then close friends but you
never know and I am scared to open up even
on that low a level to someone I am not 100%
sure about.

am I wrong for being this way in this type of
situation, I have played online before for fun
on games and what not but nothing to this extent
with someone that was not close enough to go
visit.

(And to those who know me from certain games,
I beg you're discretion and ask that any issues
you may have with me from any online game you
please leave there)

just take ya time that all there no rush really when u know what you want u will know its hard when people are so far away just take it easy an be your self

I was always a distrusting person,
as i feel trust is earned not
gambled on. But if all she says
is true then I feel like an a$$
making her doing things that are
hard on er simply to prove herself.

if your uncomofortalbe just let her know how ya feel take it slow you still can be friends but all i can say is just go slow

I told her how I feel and she is very accommodating,
which makes me feel like more of a meanie. very very
slow is a good speed.

Cool, congrats.



Heard that. Some out there have my number.
But only a very select few.



lol, really? You got those kinda fans too?



..right. Heard that BS before.



..like visible scars or hypothetical emotional ones?



I'll take your word for it.



..they usually are. As for hiding something, don't we all?
In the end, everyone has different levels of trust; and on the same stone, each has their own levels of skepticism. She could be as honest as he able to be at this point, so far, or, she could be totally bs'ing. That'd be a judgement call.



Well, you could post it up here, and see if anyone recognizes her. I have a lot of experience with 'faked' pictures used for all varieties of things, like Facebook and Myspace for example. I believe there is still a website dedicated to the 'fakers'.

From what vibe I'm getting right now, I wouldn't say push her away to the extent of losing her; however, I will say proceed with caution.



..ugh, your name is Mike too?
Stupid popular names..



..going too far in this day and age? No.
I've done that before as well.
It's not a ridiculous request and is easy and free to accomplish.
Plus, it removes all doubt.
As for the incident, don't know what it was, and don't know if I could help you find it or not.
I'd need details.




..nah, she was burned, he should easily understand.
Besides, not like you asked her to flash you or nada.



..just take it low. Breathe.
You never know where life will take you..
..unless you are willing to walk down the paths..
..less traveled.



No, it's not wrong even in the slightest.
Trust is a hard thing in person..
..it's commonsense that it should be 20times tougher on the net.

She will likely read this as i am trying to
encourage her to join mingle, as I she like
many of us would benefit from the social interaction.

yup places you in the negatory in my mind

I am also shy & reclusive because of a scar and am very reluctant to let anyone see it - so it WILL take someone very special to get me back into bed....

but all pictures I have of myself are all me - unretouched - no doctoring

if I was your friend TBH - because u asked - I would tell u to go to ----- and would not care if u beleived me or not that my picture was me because all communication or hope of future contact would end with that request as u described it

sorry I do not mean any offense but u asked - and for me- I would break all contact & block u most likely

she is being far nicer than I would be in the same circumstance

you have pictures and she thinks me special
I can not move forward emotionally if I do not
know wit whom I am moving forward with.

I have been completely open and offered
her the same respect if she has any concerns.

I do feel a little mean if she is being
being truthful this time round but did not
think ti a defreinding offense. especially. if
considered special

it's between the 2 of you and I hope the best for you

I was simply sharing my reaction - not trying to say anything about u

in that case - with a man who could not move forward - I would say - Oh well



next...


my other thought that I wanted to add is that it sounds a little coercive anything even touching coercion I will not tolerate....so the whole coercive aspect would be a concern - seems like blackmail...emotional blackmail....and with someone who has suffered enough


shame

The whole she uses her aunt's facebook to chat with you is really odd. Why wouldn't she just create her on gmail/yahoo/aim/msn/whatever screen name to chat with?

Someone being afraid to send pictures puts me off a bit. I can understand being shy, but that goes a bit too far for me. I won't consider meeting people who are all weird about pictures.

So when guys want to know the real you, you toss them aside?

Maybe I missed something. What did he do to deserve being blocked?

if they try to coerce me in ANY way yes

I can understand peoples insecurities in
certain situations, like this one but
make's me a little uneasy as emotions
are involved and mine are fragile atm.

many things being a matter of perspective - it seems to me that HE is the one being weird about pictures jmho

I disagree. Asking to see a picture of someone (a recent picture at that) you're getting to know is definitely acceptable.

Hummm well I have seen many that have gotten played online. Over the last 6 years posting in forums on different sites. I have seen those that fell head over hills with others they thought they were being honest who they were. Sadly to say being online gives so many the opportunity to play with others feelings.

Not only have I seen it but have had it happened. The way I see it if a person goes off on me for asking for a picture as was asked for or at least on cam. Just long enough to see each other for a few moments to ease my mind. If they refused then I would wonder what the big issue is. Specially if the relationship is going farther then just friendship.

Now if only friends I could care less what picture they have up...

But I think it is a good idea to know more about the person your talking too. Specially if there is more then just friends developing.

I asked her not forced her,
she could have said no.

Simply told her that could
not be as close as she wanted
with out knowing for sure.

We could remain the friends we
have been all this time but she
has deeper feelings then that
and would like to get closer.

To be close to me I must be close
to her as well and to do that I
need to know who she is.

Scars don't bother me lying does.