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| Topic: Receiving Gifts | |
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Bottom line is I don't want gifts. My reasons don't matter. I should have the freedom on not accepting gifts without repercussions. Its my right to refuse them without people making me feel right. As was said its personal choice. I don't know why its so hard for people to respect a person's wishes? Without repercussions? You mean you are angry at the man who broke up with you because this. Doesn't he have the same right to his personal wishes? He wishes to give flowers and you rejected his gift. If it was me, I would understand that we were just not on the same page about an issue that was obviously very important to me and move on. There are many men who won't date me because our beliefs and/or lifestyle don't match up. I don't feel resentment towards them for not wanting to date me. I just accept that they are not the one for me and move on. I don't resent him. I wished him a happy life and hope he will find someone that wants to showered with gifts. I was irked that he gave me ulitmation but perhaps that is his way. I do hope the best for him and that he does find his true love. |
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Would it surprise you to know that my family and friends don't buy me gifts and this was their choice. And, there's the psychology behind this whole thing. Giving gifts is an expression of love. It has been from the beginning of time. It's got nothing to do with the monetary value of the gift. Picked flowers or a $100 boquet....it's all just an expression of how one feels. "It's the thought that counts". Ever heard of that? No, gifts can't replace things like time spent together or hugs. But, they can, and usually are, a wonderful addition and a great way to express your feelings. I give gifts to my friends and family. It's fun for everyone. When I don't have much money, they are simple homemade gifts or even just a card. When I do have money it may be more. No one I know has ever complained about the dollar value of a gift being too much or too little or accused me of trying to buy their love. You may want to spend more time examining your extreme reaction to gift giving than coming here and trying to defend it. Just a thought. Bottom line is I don't want gifts. My reasons are my own business. I should have the freedom to not accep gifts without repercussions. Its my right to refuse them and if a person truly cares for me; they will understand its just not my way. As was said its personal choice and why shouldn't my personal choice be considered. I could care less if this was done from the beginning of time; its not for me. I am an individual and if I don't want to go with the flow; it should be my right. I don't know why its so hard for people to respect a person's wishes? You have all the freedom in the world not to accept gifts from anyone. Just remember that some people will be hurt that you refuse anything they try to give you. And I would be equally hurt if they gave me gifts. |
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I don't resent him. I wished him a happy life and hope he will find someone that wants to showered with gifts. I was irked that he gave me ulitmation but perhaps that is his way. I do hope the best for him and that he does find his true love. Good for you. Move on and be happy. 
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Edited by
navygirl
on
Fri 07/16/10 09:08 AM
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I don't resent him. I wished him a happy life and hope he will find someone that wants to showered with gifts. I was irked that he gave me ulitmation but perhaps that is his way. I do hope the best for him and that he does find his true love. Good for you. Move on and be happy.
Thanks. I am happy. Life is too short and precious not to be. 
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I don't know, I think it depends. I'm old enough now that I don't either desire or need "things." I don't need bobbles, clothes, games or more movies - if I wanted them I'd of already bought them myself.
However, when my nieces and nephews make me a drawing it goes right on the fridge or wall. When my sister or brother send me photos of their children, they go right on the mantle. These are gifts and I'm glad to get them. I can't recall ever getting a gift of affection, flowers or such, so I just don't know how I'd react to something like that. I do know that the last person I went out with I gave her one of my "impulse cacti" (they were in the impulse items at Home Depot). I think I'd of been hurt if she wouldn't have accepted it, because it was something I grew myself. So I think it's more the intent of the gift that determines how I react to it. If it's a gift that's given because of societal pressure (i.e. Christmas or birthday), I don't want it. But if it's a gift that shows you were thinking about me and wanted me to have something to show as much (i.e. a seashell from a trip to the coast), I'm more receptive. |
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thinking I'm glad I can still return those bobbles I bought for RO.
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thinking I'm glad I can still return those bobbles I bought for RO.
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thinking I'm glad I can still return those bobbles I bought for RO.
You'll like them. There are several different colors.
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thinking I'm glad I can still return those bobbles I bought for RO.
You'll like them. There are several different colors.
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thinking I'm glad I can still return those bobbles I bought for RO.
You'll like them. There are several different colors.
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thinking I'm glad I can still return those bobbles I bought for RO.
You'll like them. There are several different colors.
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I don't know, I think it depends. I'm old enough now that I don't either desire or need "things." I don't need bobbles, clothes, games or more movies - if I wanted them I'd of already bought them myself. However, when my nieces and nephews make me a drawing it goes right on the fridge or wall. When my sister or brother send me photos of their children, they go right on the mantle. These are gifts and I'm glad to get them. I can't recall ever getting a gift of affection, flowers or such, so I just don't know how I'd react to something like that. I do know that the last person I went out with I gave her one of my "impulse cacti" (they were in the impulse items at Home Depot). I think I'd of been hurt if she wouldn't have accepted it, because it was something I grew myself. So I think it's more the intent of the gift that determines how I react to it. If it's a gift that's given because of societal pressure (i.e. Christmas or birthday), I don't want it. But if it's a gift that shows you were thinking about me and wanted me to have something to show as much (i.e. a seashell from a trip to the coast), I'm more receptive. I think whaever makes one comfortable then they should go with it. Yeah my friends don't like the pressure of gift giving at Christmas either. For birthdays, we just go out for dinner and trade old age jokes; so its all good. Guess I am glad I don't have a mantle. LOL. My house actually is quite spartan; my friends tease me that it doesn't looked lived in. Thanks for your opinion. |
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i feel bad that some people hassled you over this...oh well, welcome to mingle, i guess...
 
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Edited by
navygirl
on
Fri 07/16/10 10:10 AM
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i feel bad that some people hassled you over this...oh well, welcome to mingle, i guess...
Thats okay. I have a tough skin; spent 20 years in the military and after seeing so much despair and friends dying, a few nasty comments isn't going to bother me. Thanks for caring. Much appreciated. 
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Since when is disagreeing with someone who posts a thread topic harrassment????
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i disagreed with the way they were disagreeing
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Edited by
navygirl
on
Fri 07/16/10 10:24 AM
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Since when is disagreeing with someone who posts a thread topic harrassment???? Well I think mightymoe may be referring to the guy that called me a stuck up b*tch for an example. That might be considered a little more than just disagreeing. |
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Since when is disagreeing with someone who posts a thread topic harrassment???? Well I think mightymoe may be referring to the guy that called me a stuck up b*tch for an example. That might be considered a little more than disagreeing but to each his own opinion I guess. that would be 1, yes... |
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Since when is disagreeing with someone who posts a thread topic harrassment???? Well I think mightymoe may be referring to the guy that called me a stuck up b*tch for an example. That might be considered a little more than disagreeing but to each his own opinion I guess. that would be 1, yes... Well, I just consider the source its coming from and don't let it bother me. You are a kind man. |
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Well I think mightymoe may be referring to the guy that called me a stuck up b*tch for an example. That might be considered a little more than just disagreeing. Name calling is very rude. I agree. |
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