I guess I don't really consider flowers a gift... Flowers are just a way of saying I was out and you were still on my mind

You are too kind.

It's nice to see there's at least ONE other person in this world who sees the 'gift' thing the same way I do ...

Glad to see I am not alone in my thinking. Cheers.

As long as you and the person are happy with it; go for it. Cheers.

I think I love

You just think you love?

YOU

Honestly? Sounds like a control issue. You want to be in control, and that includes your demand/insistence for making someone give it to charity rather just allowing them to give something they thought of, that reminded them of you, to you.

Say thank you, put it out for a bit on display, then donate it. One would think the item would make you think of them fondly and smile. Kinda KISS.

I tend to randomly drop things in the mail to my close friends, even if it's as simple as a card with a short note. My friends usually do the same, and it's a sweet little thing.

Correct me if I am reading this wrong, but isn't giving to a charity a gift? Isnt that a double standard that you give and yet won't let someone give to you? Be it money or your time. How would you feel if your favorite charity sent back your check/money or declined to allow you give of your time? Would you feel insulted that millions of other people can give to the charity and you can not?

Personally I do not give gifts to buy anyones love or loyalty. A gift to me is a simple gesture that I thought of them when I saw the item. You may not have a need or want of that item, fine. Kindly tell the person that all gifts from now on will be donated to a local homeless shelter.

On the other hand, did you ever think that the gift giver was also insulted by the refusal of the gift? Because to him it was not a token or replacement of love but a simple jesture to show he was thinking of you and is glad you are in his life. A thank you for allowing him to be with you and spend time with you.

As I see it, the only person putting a price tag on ANYTHING, is you.
Do as you want, but I would suggest you let loose a little control of that which you can NEVER control. Ever heard of "ACCEPTANCE"

i dont see what the problem is... if shes happy not getting gifts, then why hassle her? she seems nice, and maybe she would rather have someone show her in other ways that they love her and/or are thinking of her. no double standards there, just be her friend... shes happy with it, i can be too.

Thank you for understanding what I was trying to say. Gifts aren't necessary for someone to show they care for me. I always decline graciously.

Yes I have heard of acceptance. Have you heard of RESPECT as in respecting one's wishes?

Its not a control issue; it is my wish not to recieve a gift. I don't demand anyone donate to charities but if a person insists of giving me a gift; I give them that alternative. They can do whatever they wish. What is wrong for not wanting someting for youself? If a person is thinking of me; pick up the damn phone, come over for a coffee, have a real conversation with me. I don't need nor want anything; its that simple.

When I give to charities; its so people can live. They need food, clothing, and shelter. I have all that so I don't want or need a gift. As I previously said, a gift to me is he accepted me in his life; that he loves me unconditionally; not something he bought at a store; and I don't need a gift gesture. If a person truly loved me, cared for me, or was really thinking of me; he would respect my wishes and not buy me a gift. I feel equally insulted if I am given a gift so it goes both ways. Anyways the point is moot. He gave me an ulitmation that either I accept his gift or he would end the relationship; so I said goodbye and wished him well. I won't be bullied into accepting gifts.

I wouldn't be bullied into NOT giving you a gift. And to be honest. The day that you told me that you would never want a gift gift from me. I would be insulted. Thinking that I am not good enough, or what I have to offer is not good enough for you. I would view you as a stuck up B**ch. I would say bye, bye. How RUDE of you not accepting a persons kind thinking of you gift. You sound like the type of woman that if you walked in the bathroom and found a sticky note on the mirror that said " I love you" You would yank it off the mirror, tear into a zillion pieces, do a fearandloathing on it( Burn it) and flush the ashes down the toilet.

I think she is saying that that is zactly the kind of gift she would appreciate, the note ....

I "RESPECT" you opinion & would hope you would do the same.

Giving is something I do from my heart, that is just me.

"Different strokes, different folks."

Live as you like.

I'd dump you, too, if you refused to accept flowers that I had bought for you.