to be compassionate, to love someone unconditionally, to be able to laugh together, cry together? to be there through the good and the bad. good men have vanished.

it takes a lot of patience and acceptance and, although it isn't something i'm capable of with everyone, somehow i've managed to love robin unconditionally all these years.

i truly love him without condition and have accepted and cherished every single moment that we've had together. there are no expectations on either of us, no demands on the relationship, we enjoy each day as it comes and don't look too far into the future, just the realization that, for today at least, we are in love with each other, and that we both imagine tomorrow will be no different.

i have no desire to change anything at all about him. sure, there are things that drive me crazy but if i tried to change that piece, somehow all the parts would get mixed and i might lose one of the components about him that i adore.

i just take him as he is and enjoy him while i have him. it's as difficult, and as simple, as that.

awww.....well i may be wrong (which i usually tend to be LOL) but there are "good" men out there, just many more cautious and reserved than others due to an underlying fear of vulnerability. just the way i see it

you are extremely lucky papersmile.. i cant wait to be able to say that. im sure there are alloguvnah i just cant seem to find them. im tired of living for broken promises.

i can understand that. went through some broken times myself from the others. the current one is by far the hardest though.
but i look at it like this. each one ended up just being a "dress rehearsal", so to speak, for the right one that i havnt met yet.
till then, life is sufficient to keep me satisfied.
shoot for the moon. ya might catch a wandering star every now and again, but eventually youll hit that moon

There are still good men out there but i guess It's like us guys asking where are the good women at

That is a general statement.....There are good men out there. You just have to knock down that wall that may be surounding you, and look over the other side. Never know what you will find over there.....Life is good enjoy it...It zooooooms by

obviously by the size and parameters of the single sites, harder than it seems.

how hard is it?

Alas. I love it when women ask me this!

Hate to git all serious.
To attract that what you is looking fer takes an internal voyage. You are what type of person you tend to attract.

If you wish to be attractive to someone who is compassionate, able to love someone unconditionally, to be able to laugh together, cry together, to be there through the good and the bad, you need to reprogram yourself. Not a bad thing and the change is freeing.

Might I suggest investigating some of the healing CDs put out by a beautiful woman. Dr. Clarissa Pinkola Estes

* Mother Night: Myths, Stories and Teachings for Learning to See in the Dark (6-week world-wide online event to be followed by MP3s and CDs - October 14, 2009. www.SoundsTrue.com)
* Warming the Stone Child: Myths & Stories About Abandonment and the Unmothered Child (Audio CDs - 1997)
* The Radiant Coat: Myths & Stories About the Crossing Between Life and Death (Audio CDs - May 1993)
* The Creative Fire: Myths and Stories About the Cycles of Creativity (Audio CDs - July 1993)
* In the House of the Riddle Mother: The Most Common Archetypal Motifs in Women's Dreams (Audio CDs - March 1997, 2005)
* Theatre of the Imagination (13 part live series, Vol I, Vol II; stories, poetry, commentaries; Audio CDs - October 1999, 2005)
* How To Love A Woman: Myths and Stories about Intimacy and The Erotic Lives of Women (Audio CDs 1996
* Bedtime Stories; For Crossing the Threshold Between Waking and Sleep (Audio CD 2002
* Beginner's Guide to Dream Analysis (Audio CD 2000
* The Gift of Story: A Wise Tale About What is Enough (Audio CD 1993
* The Faithful Gardener: A Wise Tale About that Which Can Never Die (Audio CD 1996
* "The Boy Who Married An Eagle: Myths and Stories About Men's Interior Lives" (Audio cassette 1995
* "The Red Shoes: On Torment and the Recovery of Soul Life" (Audio CD 1997, 2005
* "Women Who Run With the Wolves: Myths and Stories about the Wild Woman Archetype" (Audio cassette 1989 the underground bestseller published before the book found a publisher)

"Good men" is such a subjective term, though....

I'll say this -- there's little incentive to be THAT guy (the one you describe) when all it does is make your partners want to change you into someone completely different. Being the "good man" isn't enough -- they want you to morph into an entirely new (antithetical) person.

It just isn't worth the time, effort, or aggravation.

Mmm, maybe when it no longer took time, effort or
aggravation to be that man, he would think differently.

frankly, it is very difficult indeed...

$.02

awwwww is she awesome or what?

beauty AND brains!

that or you have a BIG d***..., perhaps all three are true!!



$.02

There are good guys left....I should know I am friends with several...too bad I was never smart enuf to date them.

it's not the size of the pencil but the flourishes with which you sign your name

Or if someone truly appreciated a legitimate desire "to be compassionate, to love someone unconditionally,
to be able to laugh together, cry together? to be
there through the good and the bad" -- without the need to attach impossible provisos to it....

It's one thing to wonder "Why can't I find ______?" It's another thing to, once having found it, make a conscious decision to want to alter it beyond comprehension.

How hard is it to find a "good man"?

For me personally?...I equate it in baseball terms to turning a triple play, hitting for the cycle, or tossing a no-hitter.

But then again, if you're at least in the game, it's always a possibility no matter how rare. And oh, what a feeling when it does happen.

Don't give up! The right guy is out there for you. Keep looking.

How hard is it? Touch it and see.

Nice Guvnah - you could also say:

Shoot for the moon, if you miss, at least you'll land among the stars.