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| Topic: yes men are shallow | |
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now where was that generalisation quote i had a shot at....hmmmm...LOL.... 
Well, I'm just talking about people in the area I'm living. Which, to be honest, isn't entirely fair since I don't know anybody here, but I'm basing my assessment on the random bits & pieces I do have to work with. I'm as anti-generalization as the next guy -- unless there's actually some truth behind it (I think referring to people as shallow, at least in the sense of the majority, is probably entirely legitimate, whether they'll admit it or not) -- but I've met one intellectually stimulating woman (in real life) in the last 10 years, so I do have some historical support here! Probably should put up a disclaimer though....it's a limited statistical sampling.... ONE intellectually stimulating woman in TEN YEARS??????.....you need to get out more methinks! as for generalisations - they exist because they serve a very real purpose - and can be a valuable tool in how we go about making sense of the world...and lets not forget that it stems from an innate instinct to survive....think about it...if ALL species didnt generalise none would be here...a deer meets meet one hungry lion and escapes...generalising that ALL lions are hungry and want to eat him is probably going to save that deers life... |
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This is funny because Lex is having a book signing at the Playboy mansion 
Only because Hef turned up in my Mutual Match.
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I'm a realist.. I know what men and women are about and that's attraction to our mate.. We're past the time of being married off or setup with a mate so it's all up to us... I really don't care if men want a pretty woman, looks are objective and some will find me attractive, others won't, it's their call.. If they don't they'll move on just as I will... I'm trying to understand what the big deal is but I can't... People are going to tell say all kinds of things all the time and they'll change it, be lying or any number of different things... The point is the one that is for you will love and care about you no matter how you look without makeup, may even prefer you without makeup.. What then? In the grand scheme of things does a shallow person really matter? They'll either find what they want or they won't and in the end it's their problem not yours or mine.. Exactly, we all want what we want, and it's all good! 
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 Monkey pictures work good
and your monkey picture is sooooo cute! |
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This is funny because Lex is having a book signing at the Playboy mansion
Only because Hef turned up in my Mutual Match.
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ONE intellectually stimulating woman in TEN YEARS??????.....you need to get out more methinks! I'm actually more or less a recluse at this point. as for generalisations - they exist because they serve a very real purpose - and can be a valuable tool in how we go about making sense of the world...and lets not forget that it stems from an innate instinct to survive....think about it...if ALL species didnt generalise none would be here...a deer meets meet one hungry lion and escapes...generalising that ALL lions are hungry and want to eat him is probably going to save that deers life... The danger is in going too far with it, though, and I know I have occasionally been guilty of that. It is relatively easy for me to say that I'm giving up on women entirely because it's clear that there is no one compatible out there. I've reached a point in my life where I've been through enough abominable relationships to see this as true. At the same time, perhaps this particular generalization is faulty. I don't know. Now, my generalization differs from yours in that yours is built on the concept of survival, which takes it to a much higher level. All I'm saying is that it may be possible that one misses out on something by overgeneralizing.... |
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ONE intellectually stimulating woman in TEN YEARS??????.....you need to get out more methinks! I'm actually more or less a recluse at this point. as for generalisations - they exist because they serve a very real purpose - and can be a valuable tool in how we go about making sense of the world...and lets not forget that it stems from an innate instinct to survive....think about it...if ALL species didnt generalise none would be here...a deer meets meet one hungry lion and escapes...generalising that ALL lions are hungry and want to eat him is probably going to save that deers life... The danger is in going too far with it, though, and I know I have occasionally been guilty of that. It is relatively easy for me to say that I'm giving up on women entirely because it's clear that there is no one compatible out there. I've reached a point in my life where I've been through enough abominable relationships to see this as true. At the same time, perhaps this particular generalization is faulty. I don't know. Now, my generalization differs from yours in that yours is built on the concept of survival, which takes it to a much higher level. All I'm saying is that it may be possible that one misses out on something by overgeneralizing.... there is always a chance that something might be missed ....lets take it down a level then...the way i see it generalisations are always a good starting point...the trick is to continue to pay attention and look for any information that proves/disproves that generalisation...and people do that automatically..we constantly refit/reshape/redefine our perceptions of people based on our last experiences with them...i would never ever assert that a generalisation is the be-all-end-all....to do that would be shallow in the extreme.... i just get annoyed with people who take a shot at the generalisation thing with a 'holier than thou' attitude....everyone does it - generalise that is - and THAT is a generalisation I will defend to the hilt..... it is a shame your glass is half empty....the only real failure a person can have in life is that that comes from giving up... |
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there is always a chance that something might be missed ....lets take it down a level then...the way i see it generalisations are always a good starting point...the trick is to continue to pay attention and look for any information that proves/disproves that generalisation...and people do that automatically..we constantly refit/reshape/redefine our perceptions of people based on our last experiences with them...i would never ever assert that a generalisation is the be-all-end-all....to do that would be shallow in the extreme.... I think it's human nature to categorize, to sort, to classify -- by similarities, etc. -- "grouping" is a tool, a convenient way to analyze and assess....it's just that some people have a tendency to see it as a one-way street, and thus ignore the things/circumstances that challenge the generalizations. i just get annoyed with people who take a shot at the generalisation thing with a 'holier than thou' attitude....everyone does it - generalise that is - and THAT is a generalisation I will defend to the hilt..... You will see some of that here, and I have been parodying this for ages now -- the "Why Do All Women Lie?" and "Why Are All Men Pigs?" threads -- my preferred response is "And just exactly HOW LONG did it take you to interview every man in the world in order to reach your conclusion?" To me, this is fun. it is a shame your glass is half empty....the only real failure a person can have in life is that that comes from giving up... One person's failure is another person's candid self-assessment -- accurate or otherwise.... |
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Men are attracted to beauty. Is that such a bad thing? Seriously, so are women. I'm just glad that I am one who is willing to give a "less than beautiful" man a chance. After all, we are born with what we've got. But, still, I insist, there HAS to be something attractive physically to initiate more than a friendship. And one person's definition of beauty is different from another's. Praise God. Exactly!!! I personally prefer the "ruggedly handsome" but loooooooooveeeeeeeeeeeeee looking at the pretty boys...  
I love touching the pretty boys... 
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Why are men shallow?
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am conducting a 'social experiment' if you will on another site after becoming incredibly suspicious that yes men just look at the pictures and no further.... the profile i have seems to be getting plenty of hits and have had lots of contact...then it came to the photos.... i have a choice of several photos - one taken at the end of a six year old birthday party after a week of working fourteen hour days - it is in black and white and i am wearing absolutely zip makeup - the photo i think is quite ok for an 'a la naturale' look and shouldnt scare anyone away the second photo is of course in colour - and i am wearing makeup - you can tell it is the same person but this is quite an attractive photo... the experiment? i alternate btw sending the black and white photo and the colour one no prizes for guessing which one gets the most responses what amuses me no end though is that all these men absolutely insist that 'looks' are not 'that important'....it is a brain they are looking for - someone with a sense of humour, an intelligent mind, who is caring and compassionate and who has their shite together blah blah blah.... oh and btw - it doesnt matter if they are 'ugly' men or 'good looking' men (if you subscribe to an aesthetic point of view' - they all go for the pretty photo... the next part of the experiment - i will make contact again with those that didnt respond to the plain photo by sending them the pretty one... lets just wait and see if they respond to that...if they do...it proves me correct...you really are a shallow species... |
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am conducting a 'social experiment' if you will on another site after becoming incredibly suspicious that yes men just look at the pictures and no further.... the profile i have seems to be getting plenty of hits and have had lots of contact...then it came to the photos.... i have a choice of several photos - one taken at the end of a six year old birthday party after a week of working fourteen hour days - it is in black and white and i am wearing absolutely zip makeup - the photo i think is quite ok for an 'a la naturale' look and shouldnt scare anyone away the second photo is of course in colour - and i am wearing makeup - you can tell it is the same person but this is quite an attractive photo... the experiment? i alternate btw sending the black and white photo and the colour one no prizes for guessing which one gets the most responses what amuses me no end though is that all these men absolutely insist that 'looks' are not 'that important'....it is a brain they are looking for - someone with a sense of humour, an intelligent mind, who is caring and compassionate and who has their shite together blah blah blah.... oh and btw - it doesnt matter if they are 'ugly' men or 'good looking' men (if you subscribe to an aesthetic point of view' - they all go for the pretty photo... the next part of the experiment - i will make contact again with those that didnt respond to the plain photo by sending them the pretty one... lets just wait and see if they respond to that...if they do...it proves me correct...you really are a shallow species... I've done the same thing, but I added an extra dimension to my experiment that I won't mention here. At any rate, the results were what I expected. People are shallow, visual, whatever you want to call it, not much you can do about it, if you're not what they're into. Just wait for the next guy who will be into you.
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Its like this. I realize money doesnt buy happiness and I am not materialistic. However, if you give me the CHOICE between a million dollars (attractive person) and a half mill (not as attractive), my PREFERENCE will be the million dollars. Its just a matter of choosing whats the MOST ideal. I look at pictures too because I would like to be with someone I enjoy looking at, but after the picture , I still look at the interests to see if its worth the time and effort.
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The funny thing is....were all gonna be old and wrinkley and butt fuggly one day. I want the one with the gleam in his eye when he sees me!!
 
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The funny thing is....were all gonna be old and wrinkley and butt fuggly one day. I want the one with the gleam in his eye when he sees me!!
well, some people age better than others. But those who dont, will be aging TOGETHER so its still all good. |
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I am just looking for the woman that makes me have that gleam in my eye.
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The funny thing is....were all gonna be old and wrinkley and butt fuggly one day. I want the one with the gleam in his eye when he sees me!!
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I wanna be that gleam in someone's eye too...hohum...
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I just want what I want. End of story.
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I just want what I want. End of story.
yeah that too! |
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