Not as a means of obtaining a divorce, she throws it up in his face which upsets him.

Having an emotional relation and having sex is to different things, how many couples lived together without having sex, sex is just a small portion of a relation not the relation itself.

If you rather be with your friend on a dinner date then with your partner then you either have the wrong partner or like you friend a lot.

I think both my friend and his freind should stop trying to pull the wool over other people's eyes and go for it if it is what they both want.To hang on to a friendship that I view as destructive does no one any good.......... After all, they are both adults.

Bein a tomboy an enjoyin many 'male' activities I naturally gravitate towards male friends rather than female. I've got some male friends that I've had for years an neither of us wanted to go jumpin into bed with one another. I've dated some men that have had a problem with this an I've flat out told em, they were here before u an they will remain here, get over it or move on.

Pfft let them HAVE eachother.. your not stupid, and your better than that.

You know why it upsets him after having this "friend" for years?

because hes emotionally tied.

Id say: BYE DUDE!! get ya act together.

Or a case of neither being grown up, not care who they upset (due to them satisyfing their own needs for whatever reason) or the lack of confidence on both their behalf that they gravitate towards each other whenever they split from their respsective partners.Man/woman relationships can and have been proven to be healthy,but in this case I beg to differ.......

I had the same problem with my ex boyfriend. We were together a year and a half, we never, ever gave me any of his attention unless he was bored! I would catch him all the time texting and talking on the phone to his "best friend", which is female. They both him and her would go out to eat on a weekly basis, He would tell her everything about the stuff that happened between him and I and she would do the same for her life. She is now pregnant by a crackhead that she chose to be wtih for 3 years and my ex wanted to step up to the plate and start helping her buy stuff for her unborn baby, even spent a whole 5 hours with her one day. They went shopping, out to eat and then they spent some time at her house. I even came out and suggested that she is probably in love with him. I saw a birthday card from her to him in July and in it she expressed how much she cares about him and if he was not there for her she doesn't know where she would be and she even said, "love" at the end. He did not tell me about that letter...It was sitting on his desk. And - He never could come out and tell me that he loved me, he always bragged about good great his best friend was, but the reason that he wasn't with her was because she like an "amazon woman"...very tall and quite big.

Mmm..I came out and said, "i know she loves you" and he said, "if she loved me then why did she stay with her boyfriend?" Which lead me to believe that he does have feelings for her. One of the reasons I left. I felt like I was taking away the love of his life and with my son and I out of his life he can be happy.


OH GRRRR ....I don't think thats normal for a man to spend so much time like that with a "friend".....That definitely hurts the other person trying to win their heart.

Hmmmm not sure Bonny. Based on your info I'd say it's fishy. I would Never let a new b/f get in the way of my friendships! BUT, if my spouse had problems with someone of the opposite sex that I was friends with, I'd at the very least cool down the friendship, if not stop it altogether. I guess it depends on which was the most important relationship to him???

Here in Florida one can get a divorce just because.
These are the two legal grounds for divorce here:
1.the marriage is irretrievably broken, or
2.one of the parties is mentally incompetent.

I am sorry to hear of your plight, I hope your situation has improved.

I think in this case they both are.

I think something does not bode too well here,it just seems he is making too much of the friendship with this woman.

I have a particular male friend ( have been friends with him for over eight years) yet, we do not call each other every day, nor do we go for dinner on a weekly basis.However, we are there for each other.We come together for prayers, and general problem solving (if and when needed) he is married, our friendship caused a bit of a stir with his wife, we both felt that I should meet his wife (which I did) she is now very much aware of me and sometimes phone me for the odd chin wag.

Well, see your situation is vastly different. You've met her and she liked you. But for one reason or another these two x wives got a funny vibe from his lady friend. I think they should trust that.

If it had turned out that my long term friend's wife did not like me I would have backed off, it is not fair to have him go through upsets at home just to keep our friendship alive. I care enough about him and want him to be happy and if it meant letting go of our friendship, then it has to be so.

What I cannot get is this, between marriages they never made any attempts to become a couple...... yet, she always seems to be in the middle of everything he does. Now that he is seperated you would have thought they would go for it.

See...YOU are a wise woman!!!

Last guy I dated prior to now, had an X Live in g/f that called him ALL the time crying over how this or that wasn't working out...where she lived, who she'd tried to date, etc. She'd call when I was there and when he'd tell her that, she'd say OKAY, call me when she's gone. Meeting for lunch etc, calls continued until I said okay...this needs to slow wayyyyyyyyyyy down. He sent me an email that she had sent to him saying she Hoped she'd always be in his life and how much she loves him and she Hopes he doesn't feel the need to choose, blah blah.. Needless to say I walked.

By the same token though...most people can remain friends with someone even when they find new love, marry etc. I think it's all in the "threat level" or perceived threat level that they present.

Maybe it is me, but I have to ask, HAS THE WORLD GONE MAD?!!! Your ex is your ex for a number of reasons!!

I know friends (true friends) will always be for you when a relationship breaks down, but; you have to draw a line as to how much you allow friendships to disrupt your relationships. Yes?

Well that was my line of thinking! I even said those exact words about Ex's being Ex's for a reason. He said QUOTE "GET OVER IT!" I said okay I won't be the one to make you choose, and left. Best decision I ever made.


Now, I'm certainly not speaking about people who have children together and therefore are in each other's lives as they co-parent.