I do not accept this phenomenon.

If you go onto a dating site with the intention of actually *finding* a date, why on earth wouldn't you put a picture of yourself in your profile? If you do not have that ability--for some inexplicable reason--that almost makes it understandable. Otherwise, this retention strikes me as purely irrational.

Why this is a problem: If you do not have a picture and, as one would expect, begin looking at others' profiles, what will those people automatically assume when they see said viewer (let's call him "Simon") picture-less?

One (or all) of three possibilities:
1, Simon is ashamed of his appearance.
2, Simon lacks the mental capacity to take and upload a picture of himself successfully.
and/or 3, Simon is a creeper (perhaps a voyeurist or, even worse, a predator) wandering the internets to get his jollies (vicariously) from random people.

Shyness is not an accuse. I would like an explanation, particularly from those guilty of this faux pas.

Couldn't the same thing be said about people that have nothing but pictures of... I dunno.. Woodland creatures in their profiles?

^^^^This guy makes to much sense.

He has a point there.

I started and was here quite a while with no pic

But now that I have one up life on the site is very very diff. (!!!!!!!!!)

My site friends who got to know me before the pic really took the time to get to know me and we have become close on-line friends

Since the pic only a few really want to get to really know me. Now it's looks. Looks looks which dismays me cause I'm so very much more than that. They will fade with time but my heart. My soul and my personality will remain there

Enough babbling!

i just don't want the feds finding me...

'things that make you go hmmmmm'

i never posted a photo when i first joined these types of sites.

i spent a lot of years with someone who placed a huge amount of value on physical attractiveness, even in the process of losing and sacrificing far more important traits.

there wasn't going to be anyone who was prejudging me based on how i looked, whether they thought i was pretty, ugly, or somewhere in between. i wanted a man to write to me because he thought i had something interesting to say, or sparked his curiousity, or made him laugh, or for any other reason than because of the way that i looked.

it didn't last long. i figured that part of the attraction WAS a physical one and that i was smart enough to separate the men from the boys and would inherently know which ones were shallow and which ones were sincerely interested in me as a whole.

besides, if you legitimately want to date, a photoless profile doesn't get you near the amount of email than one with a picture does.

The rabid squirrel has a good point!!

This is a rational reason you may never have considered. I personally do not like the idea of my image being proliferated over the internet to be exploited by every search engine known to man.

I come here to this site more for the valuable friendships then for dating in reality. I have been on and off in this and other as you call them dating sites for many years even prior to JSH which is now known to some of you exclusively as Mingle2.

I also believe that if a person is seeking more then just dating perhaps they are seeking true love. The requirement to know what a person looks like is completely irrelevant. You may look like at goddess at the age of 23 but you will not look the same way at age 80. Love is something that comes from within. If you were to fall in love with a person you should fall in love with them for how they think and perceive life. You need to fall in love with their sole, their actual being and they need to fall in love with yours. That is the only way to experience true love.

I think that there are far too many people out here that are concerned only with the material things in life. I have seen people say they would not talk to me if they could not see a picture of me. I have seen people accuse me of not being real as I do not have a picture up. I can tell you or them I may be one of the most real people you will ever know.

The fact of the matter is that the people that typically have an issue with my not having a picture up are more likely then not too closed minded or material minded to be compatible with me in the first place as anything more then friends.

I think I am a good example of the type of person you asked to respond to this as my screen name was derived from an item I have pictured in my profile. I do not currently have any images of my person in my profile.

And yet again...the rabid squirrel null and voids its own point...

Yes, no pics of faces, everyone please put a bag over your heads immediately.

they are the international minglers of MYSTERY oooo oooo ooooo....

This is really me.Honestly! w/ crossed claws & the hope that I'm never flattened by a garbage tuck.

It has been my biggest complaint since going cyber.

When I had no pic...I couldn't get the time of day. Now, I can talk to anyone.

Just me, I automatically assume that there is something physically screwed up with people who won't show a pic.....arm growing out of thier back, third nipple on thier forehead, mullet...etc.

I won't do the "Just go look at my profile"...cause half the time it turns out that it is a dude.....

If you go onto a dating site with the intention of actually *finding* a date, why on earth wouldn't you put a picture of yourself in your profile?



Your assumption regarding someone's intention is faulty.

I agree. However, I find it odd that the person who posted this has no pictures of herself.

I would not go meet someone who refused to post a picture of them self. Much less go on a date with someone who didn't have any pictures. If you're here just to chat, that's a different story.

i could not have said it better myself. I (like Tammy) did not have a pic for the longest time. And like Tammy, I attracted attention by use of my writing skills,as did Tammy. A pic is nice,but it is not the be all and end all. You can tell a lot more about a person by reading their words as opposed (SP?) to looking at their pics. Of course,there will always be shallow people in the world who judge everyone on looks. be seeing you

"Looks fade"?

but, I get better lookin each day! hehehehehehe (sorry, I tried to stop myself)

Looks don't fade.....apathy sets in....there is a difference.

It doesn't necessarily have to do with being shallow and judging by looks. I share pictures, so I expect anyone I might meet to do the same thing. I don't talk to people in person if they're wearing a bag over their head. Why should it be any different here?