If being you ain't working.....be a different you.

Prolly fur d same reezun u thank writing ain't impotent....until you have to submit a resume'.

By the time you realize something matters...it's too late.

Y'all are trying too hard.

Take off your pants....lets try this again....

Seriously....take off your pants.

I am all about classy....I cry when I masturbate....I gotta use two tissues.

Sadly though...I am very much in love...I am afraid you are gonna have to rely on our huge population of African and Indian chick magnets to get your freak on with.

They will go ape schitt over you.

She is like Rambo....But as sexier....and sweatier....with no guns

My woman is freaking AWESOME.

Don't steal her from me you nasty *****.

Making my life what I choose it to be brother....

I choose a happy fun life.

I got a good woman.

I got a good dog.

I got a good job at a good casino.

Man...I love this life!

Wish you were here my good man!

Cause he is a douche.....next question.

We are all adults here....wish all you want....nothing will change here or anywhere.

Shy people will be shy.
Loud people will be loud.

Pretending like a full grown adult can change its personality is just a dream...we are who we are.

Be happy being a mouse....That is what life gave you...wanting to be a tiger when you got the soul of a mouse changes nothing...

Allow me to point out a fact....

If I invite you out to karaoke tomorrow....Will you stand up in front of a room of strangers and embarrass yourself?

My guess is no.....If you got religion...then I laugh in your face and point out that for however tough you think you are....You are total *******.

Those who will...do.

Those who talk a lot.....just talk.

If you gotta quote a scientific study on the effect of laughter towards a relationship....You may as well be explaining Klingon to a dog.....

Sure,you may mean it....But it is doomed to fail.

Laughter is easy and natural....You got it or you don't....explaining how people should think you are witty is three steps backwards....

Elvis never called himself the king....everyone else did.

Probably for the same reason old Texas boys don't go announcing that they got crazy exes...missing teeth...No life insurance...a big part of the budget goes to internet and alcoholism....yet still got the misguided notion that women should be lining up to jump on your penis in a trailer park.

Just my take on it....If you a 're a man like me pushing 50 years and still ain't got a woman.....women ain't the problem. Thank God I figured it out....love respect and compromise....schitt you will NEVER understand. You have had over 50 years to get your game together....sad....and embarrassing.

Be mad if you want....But nothing I said ain't true....there is one common denominator to you not having a woman after all of your decades.....You.

Stop trying to be cool....You ain't no good at it.

Just be a good man....women eat that Schmitt up.

But...I bet my virginity...You will NEVER treat a woman like you want to be treated.

No pretty mama...this is all a joke.

Seriously...guys couldn't possibly care less if a woman orgasms...she is in the same boat as the guy...once the pants come off...you got two or maybe three minutes to get your cookie....after that...you are on your own...cause the dude will be snoozing in an orgasm induced coma.

So...if you ladies want an orgasm without faking it.....you better work fast.

Not like I actually care...I am perfectly content with women faking orgasms...as long as I get mine....I could care less what the rest of you do.

Buenos noches mi bella femme fatalle..

Grrrrrr Baby....very grrrrrrr

:)

Yowzahhhh!!!!

Yes...your butt does make you look fat.

No...it ain't the jeans..it is your tiny little head that makes your butt look big.

Your family is a bunch of freak show psychopaths...you are almost normal compared to them.

I can love you...when you aren't a total fc up.

Oh please...you people want honesty less than I do.

I know very well I got faults..

Do I want my girl clearly spelling out all my faults?....no

You people who are pretending to take the righteous path...keep on telling yourself you want nothing but honesty...I call bullschitt.

If you guys really got it dialed in and know how it is...why is it that I got a good woman...and the people with no lover's got all the opinions on how things are?

You people go on with absolute honesty that keeps you single.

I am more realistic.,.I lie to myself and tell me I am still the best she has ever had.

I am good with the lie.

Be truthful...tell your lover that he /she ain't that hot and that you had better at a BonJovi concert in 1983....see exactly how far real honesty goes.

Do yourself a real favor...do what you gotta do for love...put aside all the dumb ideas that lonely Internet hand humpers have to say...if their ideas are that good...we should all go hump them...but we don't ...why?

Cause they got no clue what it takes to make a relationship work. Ask all thier exes about all that honesty.

What?

That is definitely some Euro stuff...cause I got no clue what tHat is about.

It's ok....we will still accept you...even when we got no clue about what you are saying.

This is when it helps to be a fine looking lady....

No offence.

Stop trying so hard....it's embarrassing.

Just love...That is good enough.

If it ain't....You are in love with some screwed up b!tch.

No offence brother....it is what it is.

It's a good hobby!

:)

Great!

I noticed that your fine and hot self didn't deny being dirty...

It's ok...that's why we love you nasty monkeys.

Sure you are nasty...But...dang if you ladies ain't sexy!!!!

It is a totally bulllschittt and worthless question.

Show me the man who says he hasn't lied in 10 years...and I will point to him and show you one lying s.o.b.

Truly weak

First off...weak lines like "why do women"...is only gonna hurt your chances...

Do you really want them to come back at us men with crap like "my ex did me wrong"?

We ain't their ex. You ain't their ex.

Today is a new day and holding anyone to the standards of the past should get you a big game of "go outside and play hide and go fk yourself"

This people ain't your past...they are a new and fresh start...If that is hard to accept...and you think old baggage is something a new love is supposed to just accept....

Then you will be really lonely...for a long time.

No one should put up with other people's crap...

OooohhhhhOooohhhhh....those people are dirty.

Sure you can clean it up with a shot of penicillin....

Oops , Sorry....off topic.

Nasty Europeans and why we love them...

The cheesy aftertaste.

Oh man! Been there..done that!

Nice people but,you can't scrape their body funk off of your tongue with a chisel and a 12 pound sledgehammer.

Perhaps I have said too much.

:)