This always hits a nerve... even some of my friends today do this.

You can see them online (AIM, yahoo, etc.) but they dont ever initiate messaging.

For my buds... I dont need anything from em, but if I saw somebody I know, I'd atleast say hi.

How come all the girls I meet tell me I'm interesting and have really good conversations... excited to talk again, but doesnt unless I message first (which I dont care messaging first, but it'd be nice to actually see somebody wanting to talk rather than feeling obligated to respond). Maybe this is something you women do, 'playing hard to get' or some dumb ****, but the only message that I see is you are trying to be nice, but really dont care to put up with me. Even hints and references are very easily blurred. I (and probably most men) would rather you be blunt and possibly rude rather than try to let us down softly.

"What are your thoughts, Hobbson?"

They might be busy doing something else

They might not really be online.

Maybe they just cant be bothered.

Who cares? I dont worry about it. Im probably gonna be the one doing the ignoring anyway.

It feels good to be desired, so i guess it applies to IM to

Always better to be the one sought after then doing the seeking.

My name's Chrissy not Hobbson but my thoughts are this. Maybe they are afraid of being too forward or maybe they are afraid of their interest not being returned. Or maybe they are playing hard to get.

I dunno, I rarely instant message my friends.


I have this friend in Sweden Ive been ignoring for over a month.

Every SINGLE time I am in my yahoo mail, it would show me as online, and every SINGLE time he would im me, and try to talk.


It got SO OLD I now go online invisible, as to avoid him, and I dont know if I ever wanna talk to him again.

He so needy, and it irritates the hell out of me. Sometimes I dont want to talk about my personal life.

My email allows people to instant message me inside my email.

erg!

I cant remember the last time i used IM.

When i did i had all my friends blocked, and just unblocked anyone i wanted to talk at the time.

Some people are boring, and sometimes i didnt want to talk even to the more interesting ones.

i purposely make myself invisible to all my contacts because i don't want to have any of them IM me at any, and every, opportunity.

i'd much rather arrange to 'meet' a friend on yahoo on a specific date, or at a given time, and then have our discussion.

if i ever do get any pop-up conversation boxes, i almost always ignore them and prefer to leave an offline reply.

Yeah I definitely understand that, and thats what gets me so upset... I dont want to be that guy, and i try not too. Half the time I wait atleast 10 minutes before saying anything. Sometimes I dont have time to talk, i say 'hi i'm busy jus seeing how your doin'
I dont even get responses, even if its just a quick hello.
And my point being, mr dan, is they are available, they are online and not busy. I dont need a 20min convo, it'd just be nice to say hi, or even simply respond to my Hi.
I would wish to be said, 'SHUT THE **** UP AND LEAVE ME ALONE.' That... i understand. well, it can be said any which way... 'hi, busy, ttyl' 'i dont really think we should talk..' something.

Is there something wrong with people's ability to communicate? I know the ability to open-mind for understanding takes people a while, but is it really so hard to be honest and considerate?

Damn.... maybe its just because I dont have many people that talk to me. Maybe cuz I dont have a lot of friends because everyone who was close to me were liars, cheaters, selfish and arrogant. I understand going invisible, or returning the message later... but not even acknowledging the message or the sender at some point is some real dirty ****.

Oh, and there's a difference between 'playing hard to get' and 'being impossible to understand' or rather not giving a chance to understand.

Whats the point in an IM convo that goes..

person 1:hi
person 2:hi
Person 1:how are ya?
Person 2:good. you?
Person 1:yeah good. ok see ya.
Person 2:bye

If i had all the people i knew from online on my IM list, there would be a couple of hundred at least. Some people do have massive lists of people, you gotta ignore some of them.

This is why I never IM. I cannot deal with the annoyance and hurt feelings. You didn't mention when you actually are IMMING with someone and heaven forbid you take longer than thirty seconds to respond. You get either "Seems like your busy" or "Guess you don't really want to talk" or some stupid waiting smiley.

haha, well if I leave a quicky mssg, i dont expect nothin back. Its just me showin my respects. I am just flabbergasted nobody else does that! I wouldnt wanna do no hello-goodbye scenario for sure. If somebody doesnt respond, i just do something else, i dont get hung up on it or i just continue to say rediculous **** until they sign off or laugh. It's not ruining my day, believe me when I say I have enough BS to last a lifetime... I just dont understand such self-protecting habits so many have formed i guess...

I guess I think about others more than myself which is unfortunately quite uncommon.

Mitch, you know people SO well! I stay invisible too. I could really just uninstall it altogether.

But mainly because I'm so tired of Dan hurting my feelings!!

You sound a little hung up on it. You made this thread..

I have just the oppisite problem. I get men that claim they are interested, but I have to make the first move.
Sometimes the men will answer back, but if I do not keep sending them stuff they never send anything even when they claim to want to meet up.

So what is the problem with the men????????????

I myself will let you know if I am interested in you.
Good luck in your search.

Yeah... no **** Sherlock. I thought I made that obvious in my first sentence, first post. I'm not busting a ball over here, I am simply elaborating the issue for purpose of my understanding along with any other who has the ability and care to see what I'm saying. Thankfully, YOU are not in my life

His name is Dan not Sherlock. I'm not sure how you can get those two names confused.

Well now i can understand why people might not want to talk to you.

Considering my bad day, I am quite gentle. I give to others what they give me back, so when you, for instance, start talking about how people are boring and you know too many people... making assumptions bout somebody, you're just being *******, so I'mma treat you the way you treat me.

Peace

I never spoke about anyone personally, certainly not yourself as i dont know you and you arent on my IM list(which doesnt exist either).

Now im just going to ignore you like everyone else does.