You should have posted that when this thread started, then it could have been closed and over with.

He's a really good guy but he's just unaware of my secret fondness for romanticism.I don't want to come out because i'll feel cheesy and like a dork.

Normally with my group of friends i'm very anti-love, I don't believe in the concept of it(it just being chemicals) other then self-love, etc.

I hate chick flicks,songs, or anything that deals with what I refer to as the "L" word.
"love" is the only curse word in my book that always gives me a nasty shiver.

But I secretly like some degree of romance. It's just very contradicting to who I am or my "image". So it's kinda complicated.

LOL..sorry... I'm usually slow at things.

Just because he's a good guy doesn't mean he's the one for you. But in his defense if you aren't open to what you like then he won't know that you like it. He's not a mind reader. Maybe he's not showing any romantic gestures because he thinks it will go against the image he portrays or that you won't appreciate it since you give off some anti-romance/anti-love vibe.

Once again it's easy for everyone else to say "dump him."

If the two of you have something good going, give him a chance. Guys don't always think "romantically". TALK to him, don't just drop "hints", be prepared to give him examples of what YOU think is romantic. Also be prepared to offer a trade, maybe dressing in lingerie, something HE finds romantic.

If he still doesn't come up with anything, then you need to ask yourself if you can live with it. If you can, DO IT. If you can't, then it's time to look for someone who can give you what you want/need.

If the relationship is worth having and keeping, be prepared to put a lot of work into yourself.

Just my two cents.

good point

You can't. Either he is or he isn't. You need to decide how important it is to you.

It's true...but why the heck can't anyone talk to each other anymore? I swear, communication is the downfall of so many relationships. If you don't communicate, crap happens.

let him see u with another one then he would become jealous and more romantic

Believe me, I know exactly what you mean, but it's really not as complicated as you think. I am also someone who has always been serious and logical and felt that "love" is more than some corny feeling in a movie. We don't have the same exact situation, but I know it can be hard to be vulnerable.

From my experience, you should just take the "leap of faith" so to speak. If he's really worth it and you really want to make the relationship work, you have to be willing to be a cheesy dork with him. It feels totally awkward at first, but then you realize when you open up and are honest it draws people toward you.

From what you say, you are making it very hard for him to know you want romance. In fact, you might be giving him the impression that if he offers you romance, you will think he is silly.

The bottom line here is you need to actually be real with him. Like others have said, don't "drop hints," actually tell him what would make you happy. It doesn't have to be a deep, serious conversation, but you do need to be honest. Say something like, "Hey babe, how bout you take me out on the town and show me a good time? I could really use some fun, and you're the just the person to make my day better." Or maybe, "I'm pretty hungry. Did you hear about that great new place down the street? Or maybe you know of somewhere good you'd like to take me." Even, "I really like spending time with you, and you know how much I like fooling around... Sometimes it would be nice if we put on some corny music, lit a bunch of candles, and really took our time."

Only you know what feels comfortable and natural in your conversations with him, but no matter how you do it, you need to let him know.

yeah, me

I am still waiting for a girl who I can have a bubble bath ready with rose pedals in the water,and lit candles when she comes home.Someone I can lay down in the grass and stroke her face and tell her how beautiful she is.Someone I can kiss for hours and still not get bored.Where is my hunny bunny?

Just talk to him about it. Maybe get him to talk to other guys, friends or such that you have heard of doing romantic things to give him ideas.

I think the key to your dilemma is written in the above 2 sentences, you use the word "secretly" twice. You are not being honest with him about your own wants, needs and desires. How can he know if you don't tell him. Maybe, just maybe, he would like to be a little more romantic but feels you'll think HE'S the dork? If you can't be honest with the person you're with, is this relationship worth having? You're not being fair, either to yourself or your boyfriend.

You are right about this.

You sound like such a sweet woman...he just may not be geared that way. Or he may not understand. Men are simple creatures, and often times our unintentional actions are misundertood as intentional actions.

Romance is a spirit, a way a person thinks and who they are. You either have it or you don't.

It sounds as though you started dating this guy without romance, and now you are upset because he is the SAME person you started dating and now want him to change? That makes no sense. The ways things start out is usually the way they remain.

If you want romantic gestures, tell him. But know that when you get them, they are being given only because that is what you want, not who he is.

Pffffft.

Another thought to ponder. Romance is not all the fairy tale stuff of flowers, candy, moonlit picnics on the beach, etc. Romance simply means that the other person is thinking of you and wants to do something nice for you, because they can. My boyfriend is not "Prince Charming" in the fairy tale sense, but he's incredibly thoughtful. He makes dinner when I don't feel like it, he knows I hate to vacuum so he does that most of the time for me, he cleans my car out, he gives me control of the remote, calls or texts just to say hi, lets me know if he's gonna be late or whatever so I don't worry, stuff like that. To me, that's the most romantic thing ever. He cares and he shows it every day in so many little ways that mean way more than a bunch of flowers because he thinks that's what he SHOULD do. Those little things he does come from his heart and say way more than anything.

Suzin, rock on. What a great post!

Being romantic is a skill that can be learned. Just tell him what you need. Your not a psychic so don't expect it from him either.