Community > Dating & Relationships

Topic: girls and image issues
Peekinin Joined Mon 03/17/08 Posts: 4970	Mon 05/19/08 09:46 AM Edited by Peekinin on Mon 05/19/08 09:48 AM
Ahhhhh, walking the fine line between honesty and balance,,, Think about the scenrio. She's interested in you, probably KNOWS when she produces the pic, she's gonna get dissed, but theres hope in her core. From her perspective, she's all that and a slice of bread. If only she could catch a break and meet someone who looks past the external. If your not it, you can only be honest BUT She desserves CREDIT for being honest too Something like, " I know this may appear superficial of me, but I am not attracted to bigger females. but, after talking to you for a while, your a great person and I hope we can keep in touch." Win/win,,, You BOTH move on with dignaty and respect and JMO = Just My Humble Opinion

elsathebloody Joined Tue 03/11/08 Posts: 2107	Mon 05/19/08 09:47 AM
The running or walking 6 miles was a little much. It was judgmental and assuming. However, if you said she wasn't your type, she should have respected that. By the way, I love your name. Is your real name Alexander? Cause Xander's such a cool nickname nope i just started using it as an alias awhile back when xXx came out (vin diesel played "xander") my real name is actually Jonathon, pretty generic huh? A little bit. But not bad.

ElaineSeekingJerry Joined Thu 05/01/08 Posts: 978	Mon 05/19/08 09:47 AM Edited by ElaineSeekingJerry on Mon 05/19/08 09:48 AM
you probably couldnt WALK 6 miles if you had the WHOLE DAY." I am surprised you are admitting you were this horrible to another human being, this judgmental, this callous and shallow and superficial. But then again, you are admitting it. So at least you're honest you are all those things. Thanks for letting us know. You're absolutely right in that you (like all of us) are entitled to find the partner that best suits our tastes, preferences, lifestyle, etc. Your approach may have been a little insensitive and unnecessarily harsh, that's all I think people are getting at. Women/body image is a very, very touchy subject ... the insecurities for women can run so deep that you have to use extreme caution when judging someone based on their appearance (esp. a photo). i suppose so, but i'm very athletic and smart + i will be a marine in a couple months from now so i think i have a right to be picky

writer_gurl Joined Sat 03/01/08 Posts: 7673	Mon 05/19/08 09:48 AM
I know what you shouldn't say....Never use the phrase You're not my type!!Just be polite about it and turn her down...gently I have to ask,what exactly is ur type? slender to slighty "thick" dark hair funny smart supportive trustworthy Hahaha,were you talking about me? Kidding!!

mzrightkris Joined Sun 05/11/08 Posts: 433	Mon 05/19/08 09:50 AM
I wouldn't have waited that long to find out your not attracted to someone... you should find out up front so you don't turn out to be an a**

debbie1980 Joined Sun 09/09/07 Posts: 20487	Mon 05/19/08 09:51 AM
you probably couldnt WALK 6 miles if you had the WHOLE DAY." I am surprised you are admitting you were this horrible to another human being, this judgmental, this callous and shallow and superficial. But then again, you are admitting it. So at least you're honest you are all those things. Thanks for letting us know. i suppose so, but i'm very athletic and smart + i will be a marine in a couple months from now so i think i have a right to be picky why do you have the right to be picky?? because you will be a marine?

xander29 Joined Fri 12/07/07 Posts: 353	Mon 05/19/08 09:51 AM
you probably couldnt WALK 6 miles if you had the WHOLE DAY." I am surprised you are admitting you were this horrible to another human being, this judgmental, this callous and shallow and superficial. But then again, you are admitting it. So at least you're honest you are all those things. Thanks for letting us know. i suppose so, but i'm very athletic and smart + i will be a marine in a couple months from now so i think i have a right to be picky why do you have the right to be picky?? because you will be a marine? quite simply, yes

debbie1980 Joined Sun 09/09/07 Posts: 20487	Mon 05/19/08 09:52 AM
you probably couldnt WALK 6 miles if you had the WHOLE DAY." I am surprised you are admitting you were this horrible to another human being, this judgmental, this callous and shallow and superficial. But then again, you are admitting it. So at least you're honest you are all those things. Thanks for letting us know. i suppose so, but i'm very athletic and smart + i will be a marine in a couple months from now so i think i have a right to be picky why do you have the right to be picky?? because you will be a marine? quite simply, yes you dont have to be a marine to be picky, is what im saying.

hikerchick Joined Sat 12/22/07 Posts: 13206	Mon 05/19/08 09:53 AM
you probably couldnt WALK 6 miles if you had the WHOLE DAY." I am surprised you are admitting you were this horrible to another human being, this judgmental, this callous and shallow and superficial. But then again, you are admitting it. So at least you're honest you are all those things. Thanks for letting us know. i suppose so, but i'm very athletic and smart + i will be a marine in a couple months from now so i think i have a right to be picky why do you have the right to be picky?? because you will be a marine? quite simply, yes Oh, I see. You are better than other people.

xander29 Joined Fri 12/07/07 Posts: 353	Mon 05/19/08 09:54 AM
I wouldn't have waited that long to find out your not attracted to someone... you should find out up front so you don't turn out to be an a** i agree that will be my policy from now on, i dont like being mean and i see from everyones comments and mails what i should have said. something like "You have really pretty eyes but im just not interested in a relationship with a larger woman" still not probably the best thing i could say but most certianly better

Peekinin Joined Mon 03/17/08 Posts: 4970	Mon 05/19/08 09:55 AM
I wouldn't have waited that long to find out your not attracted to someone... you should find out up front so you don't turn out to be an a** i agree that will be my policy from now on, i dont like being mean and i see from everyones comments and mails what i should have said. something like "You have really pretty eyes but im just not interested in a relationship with a larger woman" still not probably the best thing i could say but most certianly better not bad for a marine Just kiddin,,,thank you for defending our freedom

writer_gurl Joined Sat 03/01/08 Posts: 7673	Mon 05/19/08 09:55 AM
You shouldn't judge people. I walked a marathon at 230 pounds. Wow!!Good for u it was an ultramarathon..6 miles the first day, 27 miles the next, and 20 the next. You just can't judge people. I agree with you there...I am proud you did that.Many people can't, like myself

naturalstyle Joined Sat 04/26/08 Posts: 405	Mon 05/19/08 09:56 AM
You think that's bad, try getting told that you were liked before posting your pic. lmao

hikerchick Joined Sat 12/22/07 Posts: 13206	Mon 05/19/08 09:57 AM
you probably couldnt WALK 6 miles if you had the WHOLE DAY." I am surprised you are admitting you were this horrible to another human being, this judgmental, this callous and shallow and superficial. But then again, you are admitting it. So at least you're honest you are all those things. Thanks for letting us know. i suppose so, but i'm very athletic and smart + i will be a marine in a couple months from now so i think i have a right to be picky why do you have the right to be picky?? because you will be a marine? quite simply, yes Oh, I see. You are better than other people. you said it not me, but if you think marines are not held to a higher standard than anyone else on this planet, I think we all have a right to be picky,

xander29 Joined Fri 12/07/07 Posts: 353	Mon 05/19/08 09:57 AM
You think that's bad, try getting told that you were liked before posting your pic. lmao ouch

Gypsy41 Joined Tue 05/15/07 Posts: 123359	Mon 05/19/08 09:57 AM
To the op......you can like what you like but you have a lesson to learn in tact!!!

auburngirl Joined Fri 04/27/07 Posts: 18811	Mon 05/19/08 09:57 AM
Yeah,

msskarly Joined Thu 05/01/08 Posts: 357	Mon 05/19/08 09:57 AM
i suppose so, but i'm very athletic and smart + i will be a marine in a couple months from now so i think i have a right to be picky Smart.... hmmm.. Everyone has the right to be picky. You do NOT have the right to be arrogant, cruel, and insulting. She did nothing to you but finally open up, and you slammed her. Totally agree with you! Sorry its fine to not want to date her ... but to be that mean and insulting is terrible! Nobody deserves to be treated like that!

writer_gurl Joined Sat 03/01/08 Posts: 7673	Mon 05/19/08 09:58 AM
Wow,ur getting in ALOT of trouble with the women on here!!

missy51970 Joined Fri 11/02/07 Posts: 12712	Mon 05/19/08 09:58 AM
I find it seriously stereotypical that you talked to this girl for awhile and LIKED her UNTIL you saw she was overweight!!!! Shallow is not a good quality.. Im not saying you dont have the right to be picky about who youre with, Its the shallow part that needs to go away.... Its never nice to hurt someones feelings!!