Morning Firehead They are the jokes you sent me figured we would share the laughter

Morning Water, Firehead, Chrissy and to everyone else

Well they seem to be very far in between these days everyone wants to be serious I'm one who is not very serious so figured I would start some funny threads so my smartazz won't get into trouble lol

A sixteen year-old boy came home with a new Chevrolet Avalanche and his parents began to yell and scream, 'Where did you get that truck???!!!' He calmly told them, 'I bought it today.'

'With what money?' demanded his parents. They knew what a Chevrolet Avalanche cost.

'Well,' said the boy, 'this one cost me just fifteen dollars.' So the parents began to yell even louder. 'Who would sell a truck like that for fifteen dollars?' they said.

'It was the lady up the street,' said the boy. I don't know her name - they just moved in. She saw me ride past on my bike and asked me if I wanted to buy a Chevrolet Avalanche for fifteen dollars.'

'Oh my Goodness!,' moaned the mother, 'she must be a child abuser. Who knows what she will do next? John, you go right up there and see what's going on.' So the boy's father walked up the street to the house where the lady lived and found her out in the yard calmly planting petunias!

He introduced himself as the father of the boy to whom she had sold a new Chevrolet Avalanche for fifteen dollars and demanded to know why she did it.

'Well,' she said, 'this morning I got a phone call from my husband. (I thought he was on a business trip, but learned from a friend he had ran off to Hawaii with his mistress and really doesn't intend to come back).

He claimed he was stranded and needed cash, and asked me to sell his new Chevrolet Avalanche and send him the money.

So I did.'

A man is in the locker room of a golf club. When a cell phone rings, he engages the hands-free speaker function and begins to talk....

MAN: "Hello"

WOMAN: "Honey, it's me. Are you at the club?"

MAN: "Yes."

WOMAN: I am at the mall and found a beautiful leather coat. It's $1,000. Can I buy it?"

MAN: "OK, go ahead if you like it that much."

WOMAN: I also stopped by the Mercedes dealership and saw the 2002 models. I saw one I really liked."

MAN: How much?"

WOMAN: $60,000.

MAN: "For that price I want it with all the options."

WOMAN: "Great! One more thing. ... The house we wanted last year is back on the market. They're only asking $450,000."

MAN: "Well, then go ahead and buy it but just offer $420,000."

WOMAN: "OK. This is surely my luckiest day. I love you! Honey"

MAN: "Bye, I love you too."

When he just hangs up, another man enters the locker room and asks the first man, "Have you seen my cell phone?"

Three men were traveling and happened to meet at a bar in New Jersey. One man was from Tennessee, one from North Carolina and one from Kentucky. They got acquainted and started talking about their problems with their wives.

The guy from Tennessee began by saying: "I told my wife in no uncertain terms that from now on she would have to do her own cooking! Well the first day after I told her, I saw nothing. The second day I saw nothing. But on the third day when I came home from work, the table was set, a wonderful dinner was prepared , with wine and even dessert.

Then the man from North Carolina spoke up: "I sat my wife down and told her, that from now on she would have to do her own shopping, and also do the cleaning! The first day I saw nothing. The second day I saw nothing. But on the third day when I came home, the whole house was spotless, and in the pantry shelves were filled with groceries.

The fellow from Kentucky was married to a woman from Harlan County. He sat up straight on the bar stool and said: "I gave my wife a stern look and told her, that from now on she would have to do the cooking, shopping and housecleaning! Well the first day I saw nothing. The second day I still saw nothing. But on the third day, I could see a little bit out of my left eye..."

Glad to hear it

Your very welcome B I have another place called evil's house of laughter only funny post in there go on in and visit and your wecome to add to it

Morning OC I'm a little gloomy because of the rain other than that I'm good... How are you doing?

Morning to all

Morning everyone ..

At least you are trying heck I haven't been out in umm well hmm I forget

Better luck next time

On somethings yes on others no

Oh please just read the instructions

opps blue boxers

hi everyone

It might be better for me to come there the weather sucks here damn

nature boots

bartender