Buenos dias, Zero, How are you this fine day?

VANCHAU, it would probably be nice to have a activation date of the
person on their profile, like you have when they post a response on a
thread.
And a "last visiting date" or date they last logged on in the preference
search.... it seems that many of my searches (people) get on the site
and don't visit as often as one would like....and why would one
correspond with someone who is hardly ever on the site to talk with.
Also, a vast majority leave the "About Me" blank. How is one to get an
idea of the personality of that person if there is no information about
them?

Buenos dias, America. Is everyone leaving?

Hey, Sluggo, if that's your dream girl, she's being unfaithful to you
with granda! Settle for grandma?

We were them in at a point in time. Just grew up to a cruel world. What
would happen if we DID NOT LOSE THOSE CARING EMOTIONS..... AND TOOK THEM
WITH US EVERY DAY?

Hell of a way to spell Mississippi.....
Very funny!!!!!

This is the message that the Pacific Palisades High
School(California) staff voted unanimously to record
on their school telephone answering machine. This is
the actual answering machine message for the school.
This came about because they implemented a
policy-requiring students and parents to be responsible
for their children's absences and missing homework.
The school and teachers are being sued by-parents who
want their children's failing grades changed to
passing grades - even though those children were
absent 15-30 times during the semester and did not
complete enough schoolwork to pass their classes.

The outgoing message:

_____________________________________________________________

"Hello! You have reached the automated answering
service of your school. In order to assist you in
connecting to the right staff member, please listen to
all the options before making a selection:

* To lie about why your child is absent - Press 1

* To make excuses for why your child did not do his
work- Press 2

* To complain about what we do - Press 3

* To swear at staff members - Press 4

* To ask why you didn't get information that was
already enclosed in your newsletter and several flyers
mailed to you - Press 5

* If you want us to raise your child - Press 6

* If you want to reach out and touch, slap or hit
someone -Press 7

* To request another teacher, for the third time this
year -Press 8

* To complain about bus transportation - Press 9

* To complain about school lunches - Press 0

* If you realize this is the real world and your child
must be accountable and responsible for his/her own
behavior, class work, homework and that it's not the
teachers' fault for your child's lack of effort:

Hang up and have a nice day!

* If you want this in Spanish, you must be in the wrong
country.

Well, kevin, seem al lot of people here have found a way to deal with
this old age issue. Just join in and have fun, make friends; and if by
some coincidence you find a special someone someday, you'll know how to
deal with it then.

Although,I can see, that if you've become infatuated with this person
and he/she is not the person you thought. But then, some said it:
"he/she will not want to go farther and be uncovered as a fake".

WATER

It has been scientifically proven that if we drink 1 liter of water each
day, at the end of the year we would have absorbed more than 1 kilo of
E-coli bacteria found in feces, in other words, we are consuming 1 kilo
of poop.

WINE

We do not run that risk when drinking wine (or rum, whiskey, vodka, beer
or other liquors) because alcohol has to go through a distillation
process of boiling, filtering and fermenting.


WATER = Poop
WINE = HEALTH


FREE YOURSELF OF POOP ... DRINK WINE

It is better to drink wine and talk **** than it is to drink water and
be full of ****. There is no need to thank me for this valuable
information, I am doing it as a public service and because I have a kind
heart.

Not really mine, but was sent to me through an email.

Well, half the morning is gone and I must do a few things, so catch you
all later.

Buenos dias, CCP. Sleep tight?

Long ways off. How about Cooperas Cove - where Fort Hood is at?
My younger brother lives there.

Weather report said it would be be tween 72 and 82 all week, but rainy
also, 60% chance very day.

Hey, TXS, I spent some childhood in El Paso. My father was in the Amry
and they stationed him at Fort Bliss. It was a wonderful experience for
me.

Today is Saturday and the weather here is not so good. How you all on
the weather, heard some place are being hit by another snow storm.

There were Five country churches in a small TEXAS town:
The Presbyterian Church , the Baptist Church , the Methodist Church ,
the Catholic Church and the Jewish Synagogue.

Each church was overrun with pesky squirrels .

One day, the Presbyterian Church called a meeting to decide what to do
about the squirrels. After much prayer and consideration they Determined
that the squirrels were predestined to be there and they shouldn't
interfere with God's divine will..

In The BAPTIST CHURCH the squirrels had taken up habitation in the
baptistery. The deacons met and decided to put a cover on the baptistery
and drown the squirrels in it. The squirrels escaped somehow and there
were twice as many there the next week.


The Methodist Church got together and decided that they were not in a
position to harm any of God's creation. So, they humanely trapped the
Squirrels and set them free a few miles outside of town. Three days
later, the squirrels were back.


But -- The Catholic CHURCH came up with the best and most effective
solution. They baptized the squirrels and registered them as members of
the church. Now they only see them on Christmas and Easter


Not much was heard about the Jewish Synagogue, but they took one
squirrel and had a short service with him called circumcision and they
haven't seen a squirrel on the property since.

An honest man was being tailgated by a stressed-out woman on a busy
boulevard. Suddenly, the light turned yellow, just in front of him.

He did the right thing, stopping at the crosswalk, even though he could
have beaten the red light by accelerating through the intersection.

The tailgating woman hit the roof--and the horn--screaming in
frustration as she missed her chance to get through the intersection. As
she was still in mid-rant , she heard a tap on her window and looked up
into the face of a very serious police officer. The officer ordered her
to exit her car with her hands up. He took her to the police station
where she was searched, finger printed, photographed and placed in a
holding cell.

After a couple of hours, a policeman approached the cell and opened the
door. She was escorted back to the booking desk where the arresting
officer was waiting with her personal effects.

He said, "I'm very sorry for this mistake. You see, I pulled up behind
your car while you were blowing your horn, flipping off the guy in front
of you, and cussing a blue streak at him. I noticed the 'Choose Life'
license plate holder, the 'What Would Jesus Do' bumper sticker, the
'Follow Me to Sunday School' bumper sticker, and the chrome-plated
Christian fish emblem on the trunk. Naturally, I assumed you had stolen
the car."

Buenos dias, America!
Looks like the urn haunted him into returning it! Creepy...

Funny and true indeed and it makes you wonder "What are we doing on this
site trying to find our other half!"

I know it's early but is the bar still open?
If so give me a "cuba libre"