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Topic:
Dying without a relationship
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I was looking for a spot to write this and I think maybe I found it...Ihave been married twice...22 years and 16..first ended in divorce...he was an abusive alcoholic....and the second ended just about 2 years ago through death...he had lung and bone cancer...now I am used to being married....love the partnership...I had with my second husband..I like to share and have someone to laugh and talk with and of course miss the intimacy..my 3 closest girlfriends have all passed..all young...so I am very alone....I lost my middle daughter 15 years ago...have two grown daughter and two grandchildren..they all have their own lives and we spend as much time together as possible....but I WANT MY OWN LIFE>...I have done what I should do..I have grieved, gone to support groups, taken classes, volunteered(thought I was lucky to retire at 54) ....so I feel I have a good life..all that's missing is that special someone to share with....I have met 16 men in a period of 8 months....all with issues...trust, commitment, work 90 hours a week....spend every weekend with their kids....why they are on dating sites advertising that they want to be in a relationship is beyond me...I have met liars, drunks, creeps.....each of them tells me I am prettier in person a nd look ten years younger....have a great personality (not shy, not hard to talk to)....and have a fantastic sense of humor....so what is the problem..that I cannot meet an honest man...online....in my state ...around my age...I should throw all that in..I have many men who want to fall in love online from CA ...I'm in PA...that doesn't work for me...what to do...what to do.. Yeah, it's much harder to actually maintain a relationship than to advertise for one. Welcome and good luck--it sounds like you have your priorities straight, and I honestly think that with a little luck you could find another who can be come "the one." |
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Topic:
Dominance
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Film: Scene 256: Man: Jane, I'm going to get around the bad characters, and check them from behind. You stay here. (Editor's note: see how he controls. "You stay here." She ain't his dog, she does what she wants.) Woman: No, Jack, I want to come with you. (Woman pleades and starts to negotiate; sign of call for equality). Man: No. Just stay here. I'll be back. (Ibid.) Woman: Okay. (giving in to control.) Scenes 257 to 292 (play out, no significance to the question at hand). Scene 292 to 213, summary: woman did not stay there, she went out of the spot, into another spot, where she could shoot the person who was just about going to finish off Man for sure. Happy end, every good person survives, all bad people perish. --------------------- Reality Version one: Man: Jane, you stay here. (Notice dominance.) Woman: Okay, Jack. (Notice acceptance of submissive role.) Eventuality: their enemies first finish off Man, then finish off Woman. --------------------- Reality Version two: Man: Jane, you stay here. Woman: No. Please stop trying to push me around. Man: What do you mean, "push you around". We are in a life-and-death situation. Woman: I know. I am not convinced that your plan will work. You havn't even told me your plan. Why do you think I'll stay here just because you ordered me to? Man: Quiet, for chrissakes. We are in enemy territory. So please stay quiet, stay here, and I come back later to pick you up. Woman: Typical, Jack, typical. You think I can do nothing to save us, can't contribute, you want to come back and screw me (pick me up). You won't have that, no sir. Man: JANE!! I am telling you. If they find us, they kill us both. Woman: That's exactly what I am trying to tell you, you AZZOLE!! WHAT MAKES YOU THINK YOU ARE SO MUCH BETTER THAN I AT DEFENDING THE TWO OF US? YOU DON'T KNOW DIC% S&IT, YOU JUST WANT TO GO AHEAD WITH THIS, (even louder) because you are a blockhead!! Man: YOU SHUT UP, YOU BRAZEN HUSSIE!! YOU'LL GET US BOTH KILLED! Woman: And you? You, Mr. Saviour? You don't even know how many there are, what their weapnos are, how well trained they are in close-range firepower combat, you are a COMPLETE NINCOMPOOP!! I wish you will get killed, you egotistical narcissistic boron!! Or moron, I am sorry. I meant to say moron. Man: Might as well, because I don't ever want to see you again or talk to yo... (Might as well, as both are blown to pieces or shot into sieves by enemy fire, since enemy had a child's play locating them and surrounding them surreptitiously, going by their argumentative and loud voices alone.) AAAAAhahahahahaha. Spot on, I must say. |
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Topic:
Dominance
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I will do for you because I want to. I would hope that you would do the same for me. There will be no "suppose to" in my relationship. I am suppose to take care of myself and you are suppose to take care of yourself and hopefully out of love we care for each other. THERE you go. |
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Topic:
ego and pride
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. . . i feel as though i wont be happy with myself and she wouldnt be happy with me if i do not be come rich and famous.
 Unless your desire is to become a sugar daddy for a sycophant leech, don't worry about becoming rich and famous. Just do what you enjoy doing.
Agreed. You really think being rich and famous will make even YOU happy? Read the news more closely. All it will do is make it easier for you to get addicted to drugs and otherwise have your head turn into a pickled turnip. And any woman who is only happy with a rich and famous man isn't worth your time. Get outdoors, watch a few sunsets, build something with your own hands. Learn to cook. Then see who's around when you're doing those things. They're the worthwhile people. |
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There are people here in America that do not believe crap like that goes on in Afghanistan! If I understand right, he's talking about Nigeria. Welcome to Mingle2, uche9aa, and I'm glad you made it. |
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Are there any shows these days that don't have canned laughter? Even the ones with live audiences do, is what I heard.
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Topic:
Dominance
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It's my opinion that someone must lead and the other must follow. But, that doesn't mean they don't switch places if that's what's needed. However, I also think most women want to be lead to some extent. They want a man to sit at the head of the table. A man that can take charge. A man that doesn't cower when she becomes emotional. Too much generalization. Not useful in actually living life. |
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I hunt butterflies, does that count?
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These "statements of essence" are too simplistic. Both Dems and Reps believe in a more efficient Govt. So do Libs. They all just have different policy agendas. Better to go with the party platforms...or possibly outlaw all political parties altogether and force everyone to run purely as individuals. Now that would be interesting!
I know they're too simplistic, but I was curious whether party faithfuls on both sides felt they were true as far as they went. It does seem to me that the parties have deep differences in what the role of government should be. To me, saying both want more efficient government doesn't get at the root of the difference. The Founding Fathers thought political parties were a horrible idea, but even they ran for office as representatives of the parties of their time. Washington was the only one who could be considered an exception. |
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I like the one that just has a lightning flash on it.
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Topic:
Dominance
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Gaaaah. Dominant, submissive, such role playing. It's the kind of thing that destroys relationships, at least in my experience. I refuse to be put in either of those boxes. Maybe you're too young to remember the way women had to fight to get out of those prescribed roles. If you actually like them, I suppose no harm but geez, so limiting. I can only be myself in a true partnership (which is why I'm alone, of course).
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Topic:
Sigh...
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Do you have a strong desire to help people?
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Topic:
Teach me something, anything
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Animal Training 101.
1. Have a clear, simple thing that you want to teach the animal. Make sure it is something they can actually do. 2. Break the goal down into individual steps if necessary (and it usually is). 3. Use a clear, simple command and always exactly the same. Teach your dog to sit with the word Sit, not sometimes Sit, sometimes Siddown, and sometimes Hey! And not Sit, Sit, SIT DAMMIT. 4. Be prepared to position them physically if necessary. 5. Be patient but persistent. NEVER lose your temper. 6. Set up the animal for success by training in a quiet area without distractions. 7. Praise liberally when the animal achieves success. The animal should be looking at you happily. If praise isn't getting you that result, use treats or a short bit of playtime. 8. Keep sessions under 15 minutes and no more than once a day. 9. Create the atmosphere of a game or partnership in training, not submissive drudgery. There you go. You asked for it. Some resources: http://www.dogchannel.com/dog-training/dog-training-topiclist.aspx http://www.clickertraining.com/ http://positively.com/ |
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Edited by
Bravalady
on
Sat 10/27/12 10:46 PM
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I recently saw something on Salon that tried to boil down the two parties to their essences. Namely, Republicans believe that government "can't ever do anything right" and is basically not a good thing. Democrats believe that "good governance can improve our society."
For those who identify themselves with one of these parties, do you agree with your party's description? Dumping on the other party won't help your argument. I know there are a lot of Libertarians here. How would you put your party's beliefs into 25 words or less? Personally, as a Democrat, I agree with the description of the Democratic belief. |
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You know, Sheldon is a perfect (although exaggerated) example of an adult with Asperger syndrome. My 20 year old son has it. I probably have it too, but I haven't diagnosed. Ever since I first heard of Asperger's I've thought it would explain a lot about me. Pretty sure I wouldn't be diagnosed with it, but tend toward that end of the spectrum, for sure. Are you overfocused and obsessed? I do have a very strong need for closure and can get irritable if I'm interrupted at what I'm doing. Have taught myself to let that go. I did have trichotillomania for a while as a preteen, but realized what was happening and forced myself to stop. But no, I don't go to that extreme which is why I wouldn't be diagnosed as Asperger's. But the social awkwardness and oversensitivity to certain sensations are familiar. |
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Topic:
True Blood
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Who has seen this show and what's your opinion of it? I had to read a Charlaine Harris book for my book club this month. Had never heard of her or this show, but apparently it's popular? I wasn't impressed by the book. I don't enjoy vampires/horror/typical fantasy. Lord of the Rings, The Last Unicorn, and Alice in Wonderland are all the exceptions I can think of. Well, and Fantasia.
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You know, Sheldon is a perfect (although exaggerated) example of an adult with Asperger syndrome. My 20 year old son has it. I probably have it too, but I haven't diagnosed. Ever since I first heard of Asperger's I've thought it would explain a lot about me. Pretty sure I wouldn't be diagnosed with it, but tend toward that end of the spectrum, for sure. |
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Topic:
Being single is good?
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It's neither good nor bad, my little grasshopper. It just is.
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Topic:
Im just wondering??!!
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Actually I'm uncomfortable with people who are a lot richer than me, which is most people. Also with people who are totally penniless. Offensively middle class of me, I know.
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Topic:
Alternate Profession
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Animal trainer, magazine editor, gardener, paralegal, scientific researcher. The one job opportunity I ever regretted losing was as a legal researcher for an environmental company.
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