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Community > Posts By > 42BlackBBW
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Topic:
Obvious instant dislike?
Edited by
42BlackBBW
on
Sun 09/09/12 03:22 AM
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What do you do to deal with someone who has an obvious dislike of you? Do you meet it head on? What if someone says/does things that have an underlying bite? It would depend on how they were 'voicing' their dislike of me. Like you, I'm not confrontational but sometimes these types of people/bullies perceive no action as being weak and won't leave you alone. In those cases, I'm left with no other course of action and I have to meet it head on. I definitely would not go out of my way to avoid her. |
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Topic:
Just need a little advice...
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girl, i hope i am missing something. please tell me that your world does not revolve around your boyfriend. please tell me that your happiness is not totally dependent on him. please tell me that you have other friends and family that you can turn to for support i get that your boyfriend is your main focus in your world, but don't you have other people in your life? i'm not making excuses for him (he seems to have plenty of his own) but don't you think relying only on him is limiting yourself? be happy with him when he is there, think about him when he's not, but live your life during both times unless your boyfriend is a medical professional, i think whatever he could have done to comfort you any other available person could have done (cook, clean, cater to your needs, etc.) i hope you feel better and get the opportunity to talk to your boyfriend about how he made you feel, and listen to how he feels. godspeed, bulldog I'm with you on this one Ese. I know that I can geta little needy when I'm feeling like crap but that's where my family comes in. I couldn't be that vulnerable with someone that I've only known for a few months. Like your man, I would probably be backing away a little as well. |
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didn't want you for myself, kinda upset that you found someone else...time to grow up methinks
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Topic:
How Old Is too Old
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I've always had a 5-7 years either side rule but I recently went on a date with someone 20 years old and although he didn't look his age, his attitude/mannerisms highlighted our age gap so I'm back to sticking with my 'rule'. Yeah; it does show through immediately doesn't it. Me; I am also just not attracted to younger guys. There is something very sexy about a man with a few lines on his face; and I love the salt and pepper hair. That's what attracts me; not the boyish/babyface looks. Yeah, it did show through immediately. It also didn't help when I tried to visualise a 63yr old man playing football with my 6yr old. I won't totally rule out guys significantly older or younger as I do believe that it depends on the person but my preference will always be for someone closer to my own age. |
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Topic:
How Old Is too Old
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I've always had a 5-7 years either side rule but I recently went on a date with someone 20 years old and although he didn't look his age, his attitude/mannerisms highlighted our age gap so I'm back to sticking with my 'rule'.
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Topic:
interracial dating
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I have always dated interracially probably always will.
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Topic:
Dining out
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I'm always polite and say thank you to restaurant staff but that's just the way I am. I always acknowledge when someone goes that extra mile..when it's not just a job. I'm not even particularly bothered when it's fake as long as the service is good and the staff are attentive.
In most cases, I always leave a tip for good service. |
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Topic:
Fear of Love
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Past experiences are hard to overcome. You can't do anything to help someone overcome their fears. They have to do that themselves. I agree. Change doesn't always come easy to a lot of people and allowing someone into your life is one of the biggies. |
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I wouldn’t date someone noticeably shorter. An inch or two shorter wouldn’t be a problem
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who knew I would enjoy playback theatre. Have to this was my most unusal date to date.
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Topic:
2nd Amendment and Dating
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It's a little different in the UK as not a lot of people have firearms permits...so I would find it very weird. What's your point tractor? 
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Topic:
Krupa's Journey Begins..
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He arrived last Thursday, all happy, like me :-) 
He took this through the window, at our table at the Surftides Restaurant, having brunch this afternoon :-) That's great and what a great view. |
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Topic:
Ethics question?
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So ,I have trouble with this one. What do you do when someone who hasnt seen you in a while pays you a compliment about your appearance, but they dont look so good themself? I always feel the 'proper' response when someone says something nice is a 'you too' or 'so do you' and I think most people are expecting that response but what if its not true? do you say it anyway? if you dont or if you pay a different type of compliment is that offensive? I guess a simple 'thanx' is fine, but then they may be offended if there is no compliment in return,,,, this isnt really an issue, Im just tired, and I was wondering...lol I would probably just say thanks then if you didn't want to return the compliment, change the subject and say 'how are you?' which would be valid if you hadn't seen them in a while. |
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Topic:
SINGLE or TAKEN? - part 22
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Single
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Topic:
Krupa's Journey Begins..
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Is he there yet? I got up to page nine. loved the pics.
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Topic:
Kids
Edited by
42BlackBBW
on
Mon 09/03/12 12:18 PM
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Despite having a children myself, yes it did.
I no longer feel that way although it would depend on the number (and ages) of children he had. |
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Topic:
Fear of Intimacy
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I lost my virginity in my late 20s.I worried a lot about sex not only because i was a bit shy but the fear of being rubbish in bed.I bottled the courage and lost my virginity.I then fell in love with a woman i wanted to be with forever and we really hit it off.I never thought we could ever split and i would have sex with any other woman.I grew to enjoy sex very very much that was after we went 3 months without sex when we first met.It was a confidence thing when i knew she was really enjoying intercourse i got very confident and it helped me a lot.Sometimes a person who is in fear of intimacy just needs to take things at their own pace and be supported by having nice things said to them after intimacy.When 2 people are both enjoying intimacy it is the best feeling in the whole world.If i'm being too honest about my experiences then i'm sorry but we are all adults. I agree, there can be confidence issues when it comes to having sex (which differs from being intimate with someone IMO), when having sex with new people as there can be a tendency to over think things and I’m definitely an over-thinker  .
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Topic:
Would you date a.....
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Unlikely. I'm agnostic and 'struggle' with those that wear their religious beliefs on their sleeves.
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Topic:
Are you "unfair?"
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Do you hold your "new date" compared to what you used to have? Isn't that being a bit unfair as everyone is different? I try not to do comparisons.... I don't compare the people, I do compare their behaviour. |
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Topic:
Fear of Intimacy
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In one of the (fictional) books that I read over the weekend, there was this bit in one that the author referred to as the fear of intimacy (sex). Simply put, women of a certain age (over 40’s) that have been single (i.e. not had sex) for two years or more develop this fear of intimacy. The longer they go without sex get, the more they look for reasons (valid or invalid) not to have sex and ergo the circle begins...woman meets man, man not quite right for whatever reason, equals no sex. Agree or disagree regardless of gender. Just to note, this is not based on any scientific data, just an observation by the author and my interpretation of what I read. My personal opinion is this line of thinking is HOGWASH! Adults make choices in their lives about many things because it is in their best interest not because they have some kind of mental phobia. IMHO The choice to have or not have sex is generally a case by case basis not a sweeping decision that goes by a calender. Not everyone has the consistent personal time, opportunity, health, or financial where with all, or privacy to name only a few of the variables that come into play before or after moral boundries to have a social life that would develope to an intimate relationship. Sometimes focusing on survival of self, or the survival of a love one, makes any and all non-essentials (and sexual intimacy while a positive in many ways) is not required for survival of either sex. If you consider the average 40 to 50 year old man or woman is part of the sandwich generation where they are not only helping raise children AND care for at least one senior family member besides their own chronic health issues and employment it is not fear of anything and just plain fatigue. Wow..that's pretty deep and insightful...definitely food for thought. |
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