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Community > Posts By > Mikentexas101
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Topic:
Miss Perfect
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in order to do that you first need to find "Miss Imperfect", that what you'll have something to use as guide... 
Its not worth it find mis perfect first LOL just kidding The perfect person can only be for that person. |
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Topic:
wrinkles
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A husband walks into Victoria's Secret to purchase a sheer negligee for
>> his wife. He is shown several possibilities that range from $250 to $500 in >> price -- the more sheer, the higher the price. Naturally, he opts for the most >> sheer item, pays the $500, and takes it home. He presents it to his wife and >> asks her to go upstairs, put it on, and model it for him. >> >> Upstairs the wife thinks (she's no dummy-), "I have an idea. It's so >> sheer that it might as well be nothing. I won't put it on, but I'll do the >> modeling naked, return it tomorrow, and keep the $500 refund for myself." >> >> She appears naked on the balcony and strikes a pose. >> >> The husband says, "Good Grief! You'd think for $500, they'd at least >> iron it!" >> >> He never heard the shot. >> >> Funeral on Thursday at Noon. Closed coffin. |
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Topic:
A goose and a bucket
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A farmer stopped by the local mechanic shop to have his truck
fixed. They couldn't do it while he waited, so he said he didn't live far and would just walk home. On the way home he stopped at the hardware store and bought a bucket and a gallon of paint. He then stopped by the feed store and picked up a couple of chickens and a goose. However, struggling outside the store he now had a problem - how to carry all of his purchases home. While he was scratching his head he was approached by a little old lady who told him she was lost. She asked, "Can you tell me how to get to 1603 Mockingbird Lane ?" The farmer said, "Well, as a matter of fact, my farm is very close to that house. I would walk you there but I can't carry this lot." The old lady suggested, "Put the can of paint in the bucket. Carry the bucket in one hand, put a chicken under each arm and carry the goose in your other hand." "Why thank you very much." he said and proceeded to walk the old girl home. On the way he says "Let's take my short cut and go down this alley. We'll be there in no time." The little old lady looked him over cautiously then said, "I am a lonely widow without a husband to defend me. How do I know that when we get in the alley you won't hold me up against the wall, pull up my skirt, and have your way with me?" The farmer said, "Holy smokes lady! I'm carrying a bucket, a gallon of paint, two chickens, and a goose. How in the world could I possibly hold you up against the wall and do that?" The old lady replied, "Set the goose down, cover him with the bucket, put the paint on top of the bucket, and I'll hold the chickens." |
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Topic:
teacher issues
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As much as I belive in the freedom of speech and all of that. If we allow our teachers to spout thier beliefs in classrooms instead of teaching our children what is next. This teacher feels the right to tell what she belives next is it going to be religion how offended would some of you be if your kids teacher started telling your kids that christianity or what ever belief you hold is wrong.
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Topic:
Ready for a beating
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 one for each of you thanks for the nice words and your time to look at it.
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Topic:
Ready for a beating
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Take a look at my profile and tell me what you think please.
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Topic:
Has anyone ever accused you
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all the time just ask my staff
It's true..she is a slave driver!  
but the whip is the best part lol 
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Topic:
Hi everyone.
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Welcome to JSH hope you find what you are looking for.
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Topic:
SINGLE or TAKEN? - part 5
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Single
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Topic:
can you help me?
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 ok here is the thing i have started to fall head over heals for a guy but he has a girlfriend and i really dont want to break them up and be that mean Which if you know what i mean i just dont know what to do the more i talk to him the more i fall for him. please help!
Is he cheating on his girlfriend with you??? If hes cheating on her....you'll be next AMEN Brother preach it. |
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Topic:
Would Love Your Thoughts!
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Make sure its not worth that much before you screw with the original finish. You could actually De-value the piece
There is a postal sticker on it that says from Toronto 1967. But that is it. There is no other markings on it that says who made it, where it was made or anything. It looks like it could be pretty old and maybe worth something I would have someone check it out before you painted it |
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Topic:
Have You Ever....
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I do not like guessing games! Is there anybody that will share who? thats part of the fun keep people guessing Could it be me 
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I have a co-worker who is anti-hygene. Yes I mean exactly that. She does not shower and has prolonged body oder. At her work area she will have a 4 course meal and be eating and using the computer and phone. The other day I had to restrain myself from telling her off because she sprayed strong tacky perfume all over herself. I am not allergic to perfume but I have been sick with a chest cold and when I breathe it, it gave me major coughing fit. I had to bring it up in a meeting to address her perfume and eating habits without naming names. How do you bring up "hey how about taking a shower once in a while? preferably once a week?" 
 Just leave a bar of soap and deodrant by her phone
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Topic:
I Just Do Not Understand
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i see it all the time......guys are ****s....... well not all of them but there are a lot of them that just leave and don't want anything to do with there own kids. it really does suck on the kids cause they usally grow up wondering what it was they did wrong and it never is about them but you can never really explain that to them I hate to hear this because I am a single dad raising 4 wonderful boys. It makes me sooo mad to hear about how some guys can be that way. i agree.....i have a couple of friends with kids and the way that they say the father treats the kids makes me sick... tell them you will be there and never show up...what kind of father does that......... I think the term you are looking for is sperm donor. |
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Topic:
I Just Do Not Understand
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i see it all the time......guys are ****s....... well not all of them but there are a lot of them that just leave and don't want anything to do with there own kids. it really does suck on the kids cause they usally grow up wondering what it was they did wrong and it never is about them but you can never really explain that to them I hate to hear this because I am a single dad raising 4 wonderful boys. It makes me sooo mad to hear about how some guys can be that way. |
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Topic:
I Just Do Not Understand
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I mean look at that face! He is priceless. How can his father NOT give a crap about him? My little boy has NEVER done anything wrong. My ex is an a$$hole. How can he be so cold hearted? 
I feel your pain I have 2 boys that couldnt pick their mom from a line up. We havent heard from her in 12 years. The only thing I can tell you is that he will remember all you have done for him and he will also remember what he (the A$$hole dad) has done. |
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Topic:
A pity date
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nope not you LOL just a statement from history that i would much rather forget lol
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Topic:
A pity date
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I've taken one for the team yes....
Ive had to run from that "one " UH, what?????????? the short explination is the other person took it for much more than it was and became a borderline stalker. |
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Topic:
A pity date
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I've taken one for the team yes....
Ive had to run from that "one " |
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Topic:
A pity date
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Does that count "taking one for the team?" If so yes
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