^

Nice

Beautiful! Especially the last stanza..WILL

What you think you thought you were
Is what you will not be
What you think you thought you saw
Is what you will not see
What you think you thought you heard
Is not what you will say
What you think that you believe
Is getting in the way
How you think you look inside
Has got you looking out
The little voice inside of you
Has turned into a shout
The need to get it right has grown
Larger then the wrongs
A life no longer fairytale to be
heralded in songs
What you think will lift you up
May serve to bring you down
This is only my best guess
For I am Out of town

SWEET..SWEET>> SWEET!

I lay in the darkness of the tent with her..
Outside I could hear the early spring winds blowing the afternoon away.
There is never enough time..
I moved my hand slowly around from where I was behind her, close, feeling the awesome Godlike warmth of her back against my chest and stomach. Feeding me like no other meal before..
I found her right wrist and held it in my hand in the canvas darkness like a jewel soon to be stolen by some unknown force I have yet to understand fully.
She slept, the rhythm of her breathing as calming as the sea to a lifetime sailor.
My right forefinger found her pulse and with the right pressure I became aware of her lifes blood flowing, becoming my lifes blood..Becoming my life..
Behind my closed eyes I could feel the loss ahead.
This moment would soon be over , as all minutes perish one by one as though they were leemmings drwn inexoribly over the cliff time and time again.
No turning back now..
Her pulse was as steady as her breathing against me. Mountains of granite were never this solid on my heart..
Would any moment ever be this perfect again?
Would any moment bear the grace of love so eloquently for me??
Dark thoughts this night in NC..
Looking back is always infinitely clearer than looking ahead..
I am not so sure in this case that seeing clearly
is such a Godsent blessing on this of all occasions.
The anniversary of nothing...

I stood at the foot of the cathedral, waiting...
The clouds overhead loomed ominously threatening the storm to come.
My eye was drawn to the cross, the one true symbol of fruitless suffering...
They baptized Jeffrey leaving everyone safe to enter heaven.
Still I feel like I won't make it..
There are no baptismal waters deep enough for me.
My head shall unfortunately remain dry.
No last minute personally contrived reprieves for this pilgrim.
I worhip at the altar of logistical silence.
I sacrifice faithful hope to the gods of what I see to be true.
Observational certainty can fill the soul too..
Just how much does it take to fill a soul??
Can you quantify spiritual fulfillment?
Is there an equation for heaven??
The wind blew gently across my face lighting the nerve endings of my skin like neon stained glass bearing the full weight of the suns rays.
Raindrops fell from on high.
Covering me...Soaking my hair and shoulders to the bone.
I thought to myself..."This is my undeclared baptism."
What do I do NOW????

Useless fools growing old
Never doing what they are told
Desperate to undo all the wrongs
Even though it causes harm
Respect is lonely and fades away
Saying she'll be back one day
Taking with her all her things
As she leaves she sadly sings
Now I watch her move ahead
Deeply lonley I make my bed

We all float in the same water
So I can hear you breath
A world away
I feel the ripples
When you move
to the left
or to the right
I feel the warmth
when you love
The cold when you bleed
The currents run strong
In this ocean of us
But which way?
I have no reference
No star to guide my way
But I know you are there
Reading, assessing rejecting
My words
Mean nothing
When the water is all we see
We all eat from the same plate
When you starve
I see my ribs through
thin skin
When you thirst
I sing with parched lips
Wishing you a drink
From the lips of God
And when you are empty
The vacuum becomes me
I know you are there
Innocent guilty and disaffected
Trying desperately to be
Unware of my breathing beside you
The currents bringing you my warmth
My need
I feel you...em leef ouY
But it is not what you think..

Burn, turn, civilization live and learn
Wheel spins wages and sin
Machines create industrial hate
in the ever present glow of neon blood
God is in the details
Dotted I's and crossed T's
Paper work ocean never filled
We are reduced
Dislodged from what we were
What we could be
Surely you feel this
As surely as the winter makes
you shiver
High def distractions make us
FORGET
To wake up
Remember our souls
Realign with our purpose again
What can I buy to make me
Feel better
What can I take to erase this
Pointless day and
Ease the empty night alone
Nothing is ever enough as
Eddie screams for me to rise up
I lay down
To rest

Shelter me
From storms I can't control
Provide me
The warmth of your soul
Hold me close to your heart
And make me believe
Miracles do exist
Keep me
From sinking
Into the quicksands of pain
That abound in this realm of
Intolerance and mediocrity
Lay a foundation of kindness
For this house of love
I need
Haven
I need amnesty
From the pouring rain
Safe passage to greener shores

The rope was lashed with loving care
Just right to stretch the neck of love
I was gonna' hang 'er this time and
Be done with it for good
I had chased her across endless deserts
Beneath starry cloudy and rainy skies
Always losing her in the seemingly endless
night
I would ocassionaly trap her in a canyon
Or box her in against cliff face
My back to the river hers with sheer
rock rising behind
Now her hands bound her own horse
providing her last lifes mount
The rope is my friend
It will finally removed from my reach
A goal no longer to be chased
coveted called and failed again
Every time I thought I had her
She would manage to escape
Or did I let her go?
It is all hazy now through the eyes of
starved and thirsty bittersweet victory
The limb seemed gnarled and old
But I was convinced that it would hold
her meager weight
At least long enough for it to be over
She had no gun no weapons of any kind
Had never fired a single shot in anger
But I hated her nonetheless
Hated her as a man hates the cancer that
Takes his only hope to the grave with him
As the beautiful hate the first gray haired
wrinkles to appear on their jeweled faces
Who was it that said true beauty only comes
through suffering?
Well, ... I will just set her mare runnin'
with on good shot from my colt
The limb holds
And thats it
Over Done
I won't even bother burying the body
Too much trouble after all she has put me
through
What had she put me through?
My mind was shutting down along with my
Heart
I raised the gun(uncertainly?)
prepared to fire at the mare
She stared ahead eyes empty
refusing to see me raising the gun
My finger tensed on the trigger
The coming shot a memory to be born
of sound
I pulled
It seems the rope is her friend too....

^

Beth Hart, Widespread panic, Black Rebel Motorcycle Club, Son Volt, Johnny Cash, Shooter Jennings, and so on

Present and accounted for...Well...maybe not present..Oh well, maybe not accounted for either..

A bruised man in a broken mirror..

Nice.. WILL

I never have the money or time.. I miss you Bonnaroo..I miss you bad..

Headed for a future break
Heart it hurts and bones they ache
Almost more than I can take
Headed for a future break
Longing for a lively love
One that comes from up above
Always lost through push and shove
Waiting for a lively love
Hanging by a single thread
Full of hope but feeling dread
All these thoughts ran through my head
Hanging by this SINGLE thread
As (lonely alone) As I can be
Only you can set me free
Holding on for dear life
Looking for the coming night...WILL