Thank Waterloosunset , now that makes sense , it doesn't matter what I think as a man , it's what they think ,their comfort level matters .

I had to Just play it down like something silly yet an ice breaker just to get people to open up, that all , the disconnect in my overall theme was intentional , unfortunately I thought it would be precived as non-threatening and cool to some degree ( definitely not by my standards). As when I was me , I had to explain my self to some .
I though the nonchalant humorous approach was playing it safe.

Point noted , shall factor em in.

Trust me , I have no trouble in meeting people is real life , I enjoy a fair degree of success , it's just that I've out grown the people I know and I looking for some fresh prespective .

Back to square one , Rate My Profile

Thank you Yellowrose for your honesty , I respect that

My reasoning has nothing to do with establishing what right or wrong and and I make no such attempts to get your or others to agree with me , and if ever I have address my statement as you , I was trying to personify it as a society and not individual . And my endeavor are directed in finding raw and rational answers on questions I seek some clarity on for me and myself only .

This is no attempt on my part for being liked or winning any popularity votes and or propogate what I think.and as a fellow mingled "Waterloosunset" correctly pointed out , who gives a rats azz , and all in good humor .

My attempt was very simple , I wanted to know what's the reason for lack of traction when I engage with people in here in general and you guy and pointed a possible aspect what might attribute to it .

My finding are Married men are to be confined and their rights to acquaint with other of the opposit sex should be observed under strict supervision and regulated . Once your married your are technically exiled and live out you natural existance under the aforementioned system. Ok that just messing with you all ........ have a laugh

Thank you guys , I did not yet receive a satisfactory answers ,so my quest continues . Appreciate your efforts and your time

I get what your saying , but considering this being a hypnotical situation

what must I do to actually make that difference .

Please feel free to suggest what you truly feel by bringing out your big guns and going to town on this , Don't have to employ a constrained demenour , I don't get offended and I don't judge, I might only reason .

I want raw opinion , no holding back , if you condone such an approach , please say so . If you think it's harmless as I do please advice me my you will consider it .

May be Iam missing the point from where I stand . I need to know

I don't mean to offend or direct my statement on or to anyone , it to the society as a whole
Don't take it personally , as I seek an answers

Your are right In what you say , I respect that .

We all see the world we live in differently , and that the best part. there is always something still
That can get us by surprise in a good way.


David thanks for stating your opinion , this is not directed to what you said , it just me rashionalizing things

Coming back to davids point , declaring being married , makes me rather undesirable as a person in a strange way

So my personality as a living person , who I am , what Iam capable of what makes me a joy or a bane to indulge with and all of which that defines only me as a person , can and will be overlooked because I chose to be responsible in upholding a promise , this is also to say that my life status is a systemic isolation practiced by the society that we are members of .

So the conundrum is ,are we to hide fact to be accepted ,is this the norm now , the. I must be a oblivious idealist or is being transparent still a currency that hold value .

What do I do to connect to people what wanna make a difference

It about cherishing life , and not self glorification

Yellow rose , may I ask you if you find the company of some of Married male friends meningful , some of them you may have grown up with or went to school with in a more innocent time . When do we define such type of relations as and involvement and breaks it down to details of correctness . Yes there is no agenda attached and yet you have their support , what wrong in that.

We just Indulge in some of our common interest , probably like a gym buddy or a country cross training partner . In this case activ-buddies. Or a sponsor or mentor in rehab or selfhelp , where you are not related yet are involved deeply in aspects of the others life only because you care about

We are all mature people , fully aware of the lucrative don't , and fully capable to respect and be respected .

If I respect and honor my vow explicit , what wrong in apprecting others people for who they are .

I see your point David , Iam available as a person to have a non sexual relationship , as a friend as an activity partner and some one like what we are doing now , bouncing our doubts and thoughts with , what wrong with that .
What wrong with a being a Buddy and not Hubby

From this what I gather is the only thing that is not on the table (intimate companionship) is the most important thing what mostly everybody is missing intheir lives . Rest seem simply like garnish for the picking . I feel sorry , I truly do , wish people don't see glass half empty even it is .

Dadjr916
This is just my opinion , it needn't be it, but ponder on it for what it's worth .

A relationship is an exercise of trust , in our courting and honeymoon phase of finding someone we are elated and exibit who we can be at our best , it not faking it roleplaying , putting out our best performance. It changes as soon as it is acknowledge and thing move forward with realities of life , at least as a man I know it did for me and we will never be aware of it ,I am dead certain of it.

But for a woman they are emotionally evolved and more advanced that us guys , they know with experience, about the inevitable disappoint that awaits them after the initial euphoric phase , and they just hope to God it does not happen

But hey trust a man to do a good job at not making emotional sense .

To her again it is an inevitable truth and sometime not strong enough to Be tested time and again which naturally ware anyone down , don't hold it against them , they are emotionally more superior .

Let just say you guys are serious now and moving to the next phase . The effort to keep up with the honeymoon is technically over for you , but have you ensured she has had her fill on feeling good . If not the only way to prove it to her is to continue to do what and what ever it takes till she is satisfied and feel secure inside . That what being a Man is all about . Sometime a boyfriend , sometime a son , some time a father , sometime a husband and all of this to the same woman , If your successful in this , I can promise you you will not have to ask her to stop , she will as you wish

Hope you both find peace

Rgds
Al

Ok for those of you who gonna get smart with me on my laps of wording in my initial msg , better be warned , I mean it , I will find you , come on you page , pick the nudge option and select the Kick the Bum button . You know who you are , so lay em down and walk away so nobody gets kicked .

I don't understand people , they claim to look for qualities like honesty , straightforward , chivalry , spontaneity , being witty , yet with the ability to laugh to make em laugh etc etc, and inspite of checking boxes in all these qualities and making attempt to get people out of their shell by breaking the ice , I still come out empty , why is that?

I tried being my intellectual , simply funny , inspirational and made so many more positive attempts with my other attributes and I just have peekers who would amuse themselves with what I have to say and just go back to being their sorry self still wanting to be rescued . I just don't get it ?

Before , you judge me by saying I come out needy in my profile I must add in my own defence that being confident in the face of other insecurities ,in reality is not accept as charming . I've been myself and it just didn't help.
Nobody get threatened by the underdog . Hence it is what it is

What I'm I doing so right that is wrong
Rgds
Al