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Topic: Is there something I could do??
no photo
Sun 02/10/08 06:41 PM
My ex and I broke up a week ago.......he decided to end it officially things seemed to end on not so good terms...although he wants me to leave him alone so he can try to "get over me" at the moment before we consider any friendship, I'd still like him to know I care and that even though he doesn't want the relationship i'd be very happy to have him in my life just as my friend....is sending a valentines day card or maybe a flower to out of line......

is there another gesture (not on valentines day) besides talking to him at the moment perhaps again a card or something just to let him know I care.....

im not trying to chase after him and get him back, we just have a certain history that I just feel I still want him in my life even just being friends would mean alot!

Jill298's photo
Sun 02/10/08 06:42 PM
I wouldn't send him a card...

misty_57's photo
Sun 02/10/08 06:43 PM
I totally know what you are saying....

I sent a "funny" home made valentine to my ex. I know his son is leaving for boot camp, so I felt I needed to cheer him up a bit...flowerforyou

PATSFAN's photo
Sun 02/10/08 06:43 PM
Wow, you broke up a week ago & your already on a dating site!!

QwicherBytchin's photo
Sun 02/10/08 06:43 PM
I wouldn't send him anything. At this point, you pursuing any type of relationship with him is just going to push him further away. You need to step back and leave him alone. No matter who ended the relationship, if hurts both parties and you both need to mend. If he chooses not to have you in his life at all, you need to respect that.

Jill298's photo
Sun 02/10/08 06:44 PM

Wow, you broke up a week ago & your already on a dating site!!
LOL cut her some slack... she's looking for advice

Derekkye's photo
Sun 02/10/08 06:44 PM
just hold back for a bit - let the emotions clear - you'll be in a better position to see things objectively then - the things people do shortly after breaking up seem to ruin chances of re-uniting

chell_t2001's photo
Sun 02/10/08 06:46 PM
well, he said that he wanted you to leave him alone right?...maybe that is what he wants and that is the best gesture you can do for him. it sounds to me like you want him back and never wanted it to end. i think that you have false hope that sending him the card is gonna somehow "touch" him and make him realize that he wants you. trust me....it's not gonna happen. give him his space and let him think. besides....if you don't pay him any attention...it's gonna make him curious and he'll call you if he gives a ****. if he don't then just take it as he's moved on.

lcjw's photo
Sun 02/10/08 06:47 PM

I wouldn't send him anything. At this point, you pursuing any type of relationship with him is just going to push him further away. You need to step back and leave him alone. No matter who ended the relationship, if hurts both parties and you both need to mend. If he chooses not to have you in his life at all, you need to respect that.


What a wise advice...

beccalee1980's photo
Sun 02/10/08 06:48 PM
yeah i agree with derek...i would hold back as well...right now, there are too many emotions still involved because the break up was so recent...giving yourself a little time will allow you to see the situation a little differently. just give him space and give yourself time to heal. best of luck to you!
Beccaflowerforyou

no photo
Sun 02/10/08 06:49 PM

My ex and I broke up a week ago.......he decided to end it officially things seemed to end on not so good terms...although he wants me to leave him alone so he can try to "get over me" at the moment before we consider any friendship, I'd still like him to know I care and that even though he doesn't want the relationship i'd be very happy to have him in my life just as my friend....is sending a valentines day card or maybe a flower to out of line......

is there another gesture (not on valentines day) besides talking to him at the moment perhaps again a card or something just to let him know I care.....

im not trying to chase after him and get him back, we just have a certain history that I just feel I still want him in my life even just being friends would mean alot!

Sent me the card instead.:wink:

KennethP5206's photo
Sun 02/10/08 06:51 PM

My ex and I broke up a week ago.......he decided to end it officially things seemed to end on not so good terms...although he wants me to leave him alone so he can try to "get over me" at the moment before we consider any friendship, I'd still like him to know I care and that even though he doesn't want the relationship i'd be very happy to have him in my life just as my friend....is sending a valentines day card or maybe a flower to out of line......

is there another gesture (not on valentines day) besides talking to him at the moment perhaps again a card or something just to let him know I care.....

im not trying to chase after him and get him back, we just have a certain history that I just feel I still want him in my life even just being friends would mean alot!


There is nothing wrong with sending him a card, and in the card tell him how you feel

Wolfshado's photo
Sun 02/10/08 06:51 PM
sometimes you just have to stand back and let them get over you... to try to make up in ANY way could be seen as an attempt to rekindle whether its real or not...


sorry, but sometimes the truth hurts
brokenheart

backdock1's photo
Sun 02/10/08 06:53 PM
I agree with the room. Don't send the card, give him his space, if he wants you he will contact you, otherwise, make new friends and move on.

AllSmilesInTulsa's photo
Sun 02/10/08 06:54 PM
If he asked you to leave him alone, then that is what you should do. By not respecting his wishes you might be perceived as the Ex from H3LL (stalker).

Give him his space. If you are meant to remain friends, it will happen in time.

no photo
Sun 02/10/08 07:05 PM
He didn't technically say to me "leave me alone" i had asked him wether or not he wanted to see me at all even if it was just as friends and he said not right now i need to seperate myself..he said he doesnt want to lead me on in any way for me to think that there will be a future for us relationship wise...so i took that as a leave me alone for now comment...this whole breaking up thing isnt the first time its happened with this guy although he seems so definate and sure about himself this time

QwicherBytchin's photo
Sun 02/10/08 07:13 PM
You asked for advice...you got plenty...but it seems you're not happy with it. In the end, you're gonna do whatever you want to do.

no photo
Sun 02/10/08 07:13 PM

He didn't technically say to me "leave me alone" i had asked him wether or not he wanted to see me at all even if it was just as friends and he said not right now i need to seperate myself..he said he doesnt want to lead me on in any way for me to think that there will be a future for us relationship wise...so i took that as a leave me alone for now comment...this whole breaking up thing isnt the first time its happened with this guy although he seems so definate and sure about himself this time

Six of one, half a dozen of the other

Kaseynej's photo
Sun 02/10/08 07:16 PM
If he said said not right now even, I wouldn't do anything. You'd be not respecting his wishes, and that may just reinforce whatever he's currently feeling about you. Though it's hard when you care about someone and they just cut you out. So show that you care by doing what he asks and then later on down the road you can randomly say hi and take it from there.

longhairbiker's photo
Sun 02/10/08 07:17 PM
Good luck sheila. Oydt bit of a mess ya got there. Best let him be a bit. Aye give him a walkabout. Let him clear he's head.

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